November 14, 2012 at 8:47 pm #91122
AnonymousInactiveNovember 14, 2012 at 8:47 pmPost count: 14413
A lot of passing comments on here seem to jive with me..
many people touclh on the aspects of emotional circles, patterns, ect, that affect their lives.
What main books is everyone talking about?
I didn’t realize that messiness and procrastination were general indicator of ADD..what a relief! My mom has always claimed it’s how I “get back” at my father. Which doesn’t make any sense at this point.. i just hate cleaning/am frustrated by lack of space/don’t even notice it until it’s a big problem…REPORT ABUSENovember 15, 2012 at 12:09 am #117084
shutterbug55ParticipantNovember 15, 2012 at 12:09 amPost count: 430
I don’t know about messiness and procrastination are indicators of ADD. I am NOT messy. I am VERY neat. Of course I have many trained OCD rituals I use to cope.
You Mean I’m Not Lazy, Stupid or Crazy?! by Kate Kelly, Peggy Ramundo and Edward M. M.D.
Delivered from Distraction by Edward M. Hallowell and John J. Ratey
A Guide for the Newly Diagnosed by Stephanie Moulton Sarkis PhD and Particia Quinn MD
Your Life Can Be Better (strategies) by Douglas A. Puryear (This one falls under the heading of, if I could do all of that, I wouldn’t have ADD)
The ADHD Effect on Marriage: Understand and Rebuild Your Relationship in Six Steps by Melissa Orlov (returned a week after purchase) Always avoid “XYZ steps to a better you” books
Taking Charge of Adult ADHD by Russell A. Barkley
There was one I was reading, and ended up returning, called The Gift of ADD or something like that. I am one of those that does not consider ADD a gift at any level. There are times (fleeting moments) that I can use ADD to my advantage, but generally it is a complete PITA. Most of the books above are written by experts and some even seem to understand what it is like to have ADD. I read the books with my wife and we figure out together, if what they are talking about applies or can be applied to me and how I live.
Look for white papers and Psych studies on ADD/ADHD in a university Library. I am fortunate enough to have the University of Washington available to me and they have an online catalog.
Hope this helps.
Is It You, Me, or Adult A.D.D.? by Gina Pera and Russell Barkley (my wife’s bible)REPORT ABUSENovember 15, 2012 at 1:02 pm #117085
ScattybirdParticipantNovember 15, 2012 at 1:02 pmPost count: 1096
I am messy and I procrastinate and I have ADD. However, sometimes I can be very precise and organised – but the mental effort is huge!
Interestingly when I read the title to the thread I didn’t even think about an ADHD book. I am reading (or rather listening to) ‘The Casual Vacancy’ by J.K. Rowling. I never got into Harry Potter books but I loved the films. This is I believe her first ‘adult’ book. At first I thought it a bit slow but it’s really growing on me. Her attention to detail in terms of people’s behaviour and thoughts and attiitudes is brilliant.
So for once my mind didn’t dwell on ADHD – I see this as maybe finally I am accepting it’s who I am. Or maybe I just forgot and didn’t focus.
But for ADHD books I like:
Kolberg and Nadeau – ADD-friendly ways to organise your life.
Barkley – Taking charge of adult ADHD
If you’re new to ADHD and unsure of the symptoms then the DVD in the shop here – ADD and Loving It – is worth watching. Or just check out all the videos here on the site.REPORT ABUSENovember 15, 2012 at 8:12 pm #117086
allan wallaceMemberNovember 15, 2012 at 8:12 pmPost count: 478
Hmm, I’m mesy and I procrastinate! Before I was married and had kids I was a bit of a clean freak though…before I sat down to watch a movie, sport, or read a book the room had to be ‘perfect’ or else I couldn’t sufficiently relax to enjoy whatever it was that I was doing…
Now, as for books, I have two on the go at the moment: ‘Confessions’ by Rousseau, and ‘Heart of Midlothian’ by Sir Walter Scott. I haven’t read an ADHD book before…..REPORT ABUSENovember 15, 2012 at 9:27 pm #117087
sdwaParticipantNovember 15, 2012 at 9:27 pmPost count: 363
In my opinion and experience, it is often the case that someone will perceive ADHD related behavior as indicative of a bad attitude – such as being selfish, self-centered, passive-aggressive, lazy, crazy, stupid, etc. What I have learned is that the better I know my ADHD, the better able I am to understand myself, and as a result, not take other people’s inaccurate interpretations so much to heart. I’ve learned to avoid situations where I know I have a low chance of success.
My life is total chaos. There is always a giant pile of laundry, dishes, unopened bills, stacks of papers, little notes and lists of ideas and things that need to get done, journal full of ramblings that seem to repeat from one year to the next, heaps of real broken junk, and closets stuffed full of old clothes, books, shoes, busted lamp shades, boxes of papers I thought I might need some day, etc. No matter how hard I try, even with a weekly routine of kitchen cleaning and laundry, the stuff piles back up almost immediately. It’s like it breeds on its own. My guess, although I certainly haven’t been able to muster the will to test this theory, is that it’s better for people with ADHD to avoid having possessions whenever possible.
The tendency to procrastinate is usually associated with my level of interest. According to Russell Barkley, this makes sense, because most of us have a certain stimulation threshold below which very little gets done, and above which we go completely nuts – the plateau of effectiveness tends to be pretty narrow. The trick is to start to notice what gets you into that ideal range of being able to focus and engage.
Two books I highly recommend are not ADHD books, but I have found them both illuminating. The author is Robert Fritz. I don’t agree with everything he says about everything, but his general themes helped me clarify what matters most in my life. One of his books is a rather dense read and takes time to get through, but I think is the superior volume: The Path of Least Resistance. The other book is much more accessible, and is called Your Life As Art. Both address the creative process.
Having been an art student and involved in graphic design and creative writing, his discussion of what goes into an act of creating resonated for me. Fritz takes the creative process and suggests that we can apply it to all aspects of our lives. It’s a way of functioning not limited to painting a picture or knitting a hat or writing a story. If you do anything like that, you already know how to visualize what you want, assemble your materials, organize the steps, and recognize how close you are to completing a project. But the most important feature is that you have to love something enough to want to see it exist. Artists make stuff for its own sake, not as a means to an end, but as an end in itself. I have found that identifying those things I care about for themselves, rather than for what they might do for me, helps me focus my energy.
For me, his ideas speak to a kind of existential fog that has dominated much of my life – the “why are we here and what does it all mean” kinds of questions – complicated by what Gabor Mate wrote in his book “Scattered” about how ADHD can affect one’s ability to differentiate emotionally and develop a strong sense of self. “Scattered” is also on my highly recommended list because it’s very insightful and talks about the emotional impact and reverberations of ADHD which most books ignore. He seems to think ADHD has a genetic component but is not directly caused by genetics, which for some people might make him controversial. Personally, I don’t care where ADHD comes from – I just care about how to manage it.
Along similar lines, the Sari Solden tome “Journeys through ADDulthood” is pretty comprehensive in terms of looking at multiple aspects of one’s life.
Ari Tuckman’s big old encyclopedic volume is good, but for getting results, it might be easier to check out his new work book. I’ve been going through it and like it. I forget what it’s called, but something pretty straightforward like “ADHD work book.” You can find it.
If you have issues with “emotional disregulation” – meaning, you get upset and lose hours of your life to fulminating and obsessing (something I am prone to) there is an excellent book on Dialectical Behavior Therapy, another work book…it has a green cover…and guides you through a therapeutic approach that ignores the typical cognitive-behavior method of re-writing thoughts and goes straight to how to manage emotions in more physical, sensory-oriented ways, including developing an emergency resource kit, and assertiveness training exercises.
I like Russell Barkley’s bright yellow book on adult ADHD, but find that I can’t make much actual use of his exercises. The information is great – the workbook stuff, not so much.
In my experience, books that try to be all happy and superficial and provide formulas for organizing stuff or being on time etc….those approaches leave me cold, and just don’t work, because they often miss the point: overall motivation.
There’s this independent ADHDer who is not a “trained professional” but nevertheless came up with what I think is a quite snappy and helpful video called “ADD Crusher.” You can find segments of this for free on YouTube.REPORT ABUSENovember 15, 2012 at 10:24 pm #117088
What are you all reading??2012-11-14T20:47:17+00:00
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