What was time like growing up?

[msnow81]

I’m 29 and I was wandering what time felt like growing up for adults who had add growing up?

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[shutterbug55]

funny you should ask. My councilor asked me a similar question today. For me time went by FAST. I spent most of my childhood alone. I liked it that way, because I wasn’t getting teased and tormented by my “friends”. My favorite activity? Talking to people half way around the world on the HAM radio. Watching my fish swimming around in their tank. Playing with a microscope my parents got me for Christmas one year.

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[msnow81]

Thank you for replying. I was asked a similar question and the two things that came to mind was how fast time went by without realizing it and in some ways liked being alone.

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[Curlymoe115]

I was diagnosed when I was 4. I always had my family and my books. My interactions with my peers were nightmarish so I invented a life that was to my liking. I was “the blue bullet” or “a super sleuth” or whatever other things caught my attention. My day started at 4 or 5 in the morning and I was usually dead to the world by 8 or 9 at night. I was sickly and caught every virus or cold and spent a lot of time at home reading books. My friendships lasted really short times and then they usually became an enemy. Anything that I thought went straight from brain to mouth with no filter so I got beat up a lot. For me time in summer dragged and a day lasted for weeks but looking back everything seems to have passed in a blur.

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[Anonymous]

I’m 28, just learned about my adhd about 2 months ago.

How was it like? That’s an interesting question!

I remember being friends with pretty much everyone at school but didn’t really have a best friend and out of school was pretty lonely, I usually didn’t go very far in the relationships that I had, I was a great icebreaker but had problems afterwards…I wouldn’t hang out with friends after school usually, I was a daydreamer in childhood and adolescence….I would usually have a piece of paper around where i would jot down whatever went through my head at that time usually while I was in class. I always felt kinda different but not necessarly in a bad way, i saw things differently. At school I was capable of the best and worst….I could fail an exam big time and come back after and get a great grade….my grades where always up and down, usually I was in between the good students and the slackers so usually in the mid 70 percentile. I remember spending a lot of time at home, I would always have trouble getting started on something and also finishing. I was generally a happy kid but kinda felt like I always underachieved. I remember highschool graduation where they were handing out awards for pretty much everything: best student ; best in sports ; goofiest student etc….and I remember almost everyone had an award but me….that was pretty much the story of my childhood.

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[billd]

LOL – I was trouble in school. Oh, I knew the material, but was “disruptive”. So much so, my parents and teacher called in the school psychologist. I took some tests, then there was a meeting. The psychologist turned to my mother and said “doesn’t it scare you”, my mother, being totally lost on that comment asked what the heck he meant.

He said “having a child with such a high IQ. He’s this way simply because he’s bored and ahead of the material.

That was my official diagnosis back in the 60s.

I didn’t have many friends, didn’t mind being alone with my “stuff” – microscope, telescope, train sets, and so on.

I didn’t have bad grades for the most part except for English (and back then did well in spelling, now my spelling sucks) but did better in college when I was totally engrossed and interested in what I was taking, again, except for English!

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[Anonymous]

I was the girl who would be one of the guys. Very few pepole I could call friends.

Was the tallest student, even taller the the pirncable for a few years.

Was tooth pick.

My mom made the school hold be back in 1st grade. Which would be wore for me if didn’t.

Whitch made me even older, My birthday is in Dec., then repeating 1 grade made me 2 years older then my co-students.

Was in speical ED classses. all my classes. Except my Histoy teacher, He gave me a C, When I shoud have gotton E, He know I was Trying. some teacher in Jr. & High school.

Home work for me that took all your classes in 3Hr., it took me 3 hr. to do one class.

In jr. high I thought I had a best friend, then i dated her brother, that all changed are relasionship.

Was called names, in my 30 someone remberded me by the girl who could not get her pants off & wet herself. ):

Was to tall, to skinny, to dume, to unpredicable.

Was sick alote, but do not know if I had the chichinpox, remeber bing around the as a child and when my kids had them, still never had them as far as I know.

From Jr. High Iwent to a scool farther away from home, Where they went to the they caould walk to.

I have some contec with the old friends on face book. But I will go off on one of my I don;t care. Then they will back off.

Had no dad at home, or one that wanted to see me,

(My dad still comes across as My new wife & kids come 1st, We are all adults now)

Had a step dad that would chace me around the, thought he would hit me.

Was in a melt abuse relationship.

Had to kids, That was the only thing good that came out of the relationship.

Finsh high school at a collage & finsh a cabinet shop class Hr.

Then I met my husband, found out how a women is supose to be treated.

I met My husband the 1st time when I was 13. difftern story.

Will name it close to the above statement.

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[Anonymous]

Always had major depression and anger problems, more depression then anger when I was young. Very difficult time with any male friends. I got along better with girls. Could not read or write by grade 2 so I repeated that year. I never felt like I fit into any kind of group ( I was a loner ) I made friends with other people like me but I didn’t know why…we got into tons of trouble,,( @15) some pretty bad stuff too. Like stealing peoples cars etc. I forgot at 13 I was hospitalized for gastric intestinal, never found out what that was about. I only got to grade 9 if I would go to summer school for reading. Funny because it was the first time I almost finished a book. All though high school I was in remedial English. I had a detention pretty much everyday because of being late. I decided to just skip fist class to try to avoid the detentions. By grade 11 I was seeing a psychiatrist. Long story short I was put into the psychiatric ward out patient for 6 months. I was on all kids of anti-depressants, they did nothing. I met a girl in there. Sex was a pretty good distraction, I felt better. Depression got the better of me again and I ended up back at the hospital, (26 after 4 years of serve depression) I didn’t like it so I didn’t stay ( no girls lol ). Things have been all over the place for me and this is just a small summary of when I was young. Things never got better, they just changed. Couldn’t keep friends, I got bored of them fast and I didn’t fit into there life style ( they were too mature ). Life has been a puzzle for me that I could never understand. Now at 49 I feel that I’m on the brink of a positive change….. I hope… at least I got my grade 12 just recently. I hope this answers you request.

John

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[Anonymous]

Hi, i’m 31 and 5/12th years old, I was diagnosed in January of this year. I always thought that my childhood was a normal one. When I found out I have ADHD and started learning so much about it I found that my childhood was not typical, I supposse on the forum here i’m just another part of the average.

Socially I spent most of my of my time alone. I’ve always felt like an outsider and being an orphan didnt help. My adopted parents are great, I never knew my birth parents and i’m sure there is some psycological things going on there. My mothers side of the family was/is great. My fathers side being from the south had a nice outlook on anyone not from the south and not white. My father would always tease my sister and I about how we were our grandparents and uncle’s favorites despite being Korean. Not so funny now huh? Maybe too much information? Even some of my earliest memories are of me playing alone, or being alone. I had 2 step-brothers and a sister, I had some friends but always felt like an outsider in the group. Due to chronic academic failures throughout my entire childhood I stayed in a state of perpetual trouble at home and at school, (nice segway into the academic part huh?) School was always horrible for me. One of my earliest memories from school would have to be not being able to sleep at night because of stress, (how in the world at age 5-6 does that happen?) getting into trouble for going over my ABC’s and not being in bed. In 1rst grade, I got my first F that I can remember. My mother told me that when i was even younger than whatever age i was in 1rst grade that I would refuse to do my homework. I’d cry and throw a fit and would scribble on the paper in the same place until I would wear a hole through the paper (I didnt tear it, It wore through). Moving on, I was labled the “class clown” in 4th grade. This carried over into 5th grade which resulted in being held back a year. Around this time the school that I attended wanted me to see a counceler and suggested to my parents that i may have a “Learning Disability”. I understood quite well what that meant for my future and did not allow testing. I told the counceler what he wanted to hear and slipped through the system. 6th grade was my best year of school I think. My teacher was known for being mean and scared the “…..” out of me. I still continued to struggle but out of fear did what i needed to apease her and my parents. Jr. High didnt go so well and the pattern stayed about the same academiclly speaking. In social terms this is about the time I started smoking ciggerettes, I had my first real drink of booze and taste of marijuana which continued for the year. This was also the first time I got into actual trouble with the law. Well it happend a couple of times actually. My freshman year of Highschool was the worst. How could a hyperactive, immature minority in a small town school system get along? I was back into the class of being an outcast with some other friends of mine who in retrospect may have had ADHD.

Highschool I got along fine but continued to slip through the cracks, Throughout highschool my experimenting with other drugs continued and my drinking became really bad. My Senior year I had 1 class left over from my freshman year of highschool (U.S. History). I had 2 F’s with 6 weeks of school left, and I had to pass. I was pushed through; my son had been born in Febuary of my graduating year in 1998. I think the teachers collectivly thought my head was in parenting and not in school so thats how that went.

My over feeling is that it happened way too fast. I’m remorsful that i didnt take the advantage I had in 5th grade (the second time around) when the school wanted to test me for an LD. At the time though LD was thrown around a lot and was a generic term used for anyone with any kind of mental health isue. I didnt (at the time) want to be classified by the system and my peers as “retraded or stupid”. Obviously this is not true and we all know better.

Sorry this is such a long reply, it seems like I may have some stuff to get off my chest.

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[laddybug3]

What was it like when I was growing up? Part of me was waiting for me or my peers to grow-up. Fourth grade I lost most of my friends and became an outcast over night. Fourth through eighth grade, I became a loner.

In high school, I did so many clubs, that I had one everyday. Made the honor roll, like three times. My senior year I was student of the month. It was hard to seeing my picture and the breakfast. I did not want to be talked about and many teachers, even the dean thought I should have been student of the month by then. I liked English, History, and band. Band was my escape, other then the clubs. I was at least president for three years in a row. Many, times I wanted to run away. Too much pressure on me, and I had to go to a few extra meeting for presidents of clubs. One teacher was surprised at my time management. Then one day I lost my assignment note pad and I totally was freaking out.

Most of the time I felt like I somehow, was older then I was and found myself waiting for my age to catch up; other times I felt like I was behind. I am still feel this way, and that sounds really sad.

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[msnow81]

It is a huge weight lifted to know there are others who had the same childhood

as I did. Thank you for responding.

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[Rocky]

I often lost focus in school and talked alot.

I rushed through things like homework and eating just to get it over with. I felt like those things were a waste of time, I just wanted to cut to the chase and do some fun stuff. If I had an orange with seeds, I didn’t want it because I didn’t want to take the time to think about the seeds that I had to spit out.

My handwriting was sloppy and sometimes I left parts of an assignment incomplete. I also felt very bored sitting in church, I felt like I wanted to bounce off the ceiling because I couldn’t wait until lunch time so I could play with the other kids.

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[Anonymous]

I think your question was about time………….everything seemed to last forever…..summmer was years long. A was in school public and high school for ever!!!! It seemed adulthood and all it brings was soooooooooo…….far off in the distance. Even days seemed to last a long time…….now at 62 it slips by so damn fast, 10 years go by in the blink of an eye……and it’s picking up speed. I’m not complaining….it’s been a super trip so far….but that is/was time for me.

Toofat

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[Misswho23]

Just recently joined this site and what a relief! It’s been great reading all the posts and finally being part of the norm. The norm of Adders.

I was diagnosed last January. I’m in my forties now (yikes!) so later diagnosis. Talk about time going fast!

School and growing up was just one chaotic big mess for me. But surprisingly when I look back I also had some pretty good successes. They just got over shadowed by all the other stuff. Before 5 I remember being happy but always the little girl who would talk too much couldn’t sit still. Well that’s what I was told. I just thought hey I’m having lots of fun what’s the problem?

There were times when I got a long with friends and then times I didn’t. Times I could be outgoing and then all of a sudden shy and withdrawn. I think it was about in the second grade that real school problems started. I was not being included on groups didn’t do well in sports activities during recess so other kids didn’t want me playing with them. So I withdrew. Then coupled with that I also fell behind with school work. I would feel that I understood the material but just couldn’t present it back. Or would hear part of instructions but then get lost in them. It was like a blip in my brain. So try being in the second grade and explaining this to adults. The response was I needed to apply myself more. Yeah right, my brain was already fatigued from all the “trying”. So learned to throw a major temper tantrum to get the frustration and pent up energy out and also to avoid doing my work.

But on the flip side I had a creative streak that I could really tap into. I excelled believe it or not at reading, history, social studies, music, pretty much anything art related. I could all of a sudden out of nowhere produce some really good work related to that. For example in 4th grade I drew a pencil drawing and my teacher finally noticed me and suggested I enter the county art show. It was a first attempt at a realistic drawing. I won a blue ribbon. But my self esteem was out of whack. It was supposed to look like the mouse Stuart Little and my proportions where a bit off and it looked more like a rat. So I developed a sense if being a fraud who won a prize for something other than what it should have been. This also happened with music. I could read the music and play well but just couldn’t figure out how to count and the timing. So I would find a way to have the teacher play it or fake playing while I listened to other students play and then I could mimic what I hear. So it was another secret to bear. God forbid if I was asked to play something before I heard it first.

In Jr. high I did a little better. there was an 8th grade class called Law and Free Society that you had to have a higher GPA and maintain to get into. So in 7th grade that was my incentive. To get into the class that all the smart kids were into and I really was interested in the class. You go to do extracurricular things and leave school to go watch government in session. I did get the GPA needed and a little higher than the cut off. So with a reward that I was interested in I could actually apply myself. If I didn’t care then I just wouldn’t do the work. Math is an area I always struggled with and the mere mention of it give me hives. But I found a way to pass.

High school was the worst. Even though I had been doing better in Jr. High the social pressure and anxiety was really taking a toll. I still had problems fitting in and kept trying on different personas. Like Lady of Comedy also referred to as class clown. The bookworm. The outcast raging against society. And my favorite “skits” I would do at school around friends or in class. Accents like being english were one of my favorites and teachers could not stand for it. I dreamed of being on Saturday Night Live. I just couldn’t find a way to be myself. As a result I developed agoraphobia. I diagnosed my self in a high school psychology class assignment. This was after being dragged to a ton of shrinks trying to figure me out. The got sidetracked with all the depression, anxiety and getting into alcohol and smoking pot.

But also found a way to gout out of the agoraphobia once I got a book on it and studied about it. Research is another thing I love to do.

Just noticed this post is turing into a novel. Hello monologue! So to wrap up. Dropped out of school, got married way to young, got divorced no kids out of that one. thank god. Did graduate later and attended college. College is another post in hyper focus. I graduated in Graphic Design and have been doing that for 12 years or so. Successful but was discharged from my job of 11 years and have been looking for work for the last year.

These are some of the things I used to compensate for what I know now was ADD. For time it either went by really fast or agonizingly slow. Reeeeeaaally slow. Still does. Hope this helps for anyone reading this as it does me. Just know other have gone through it. And we never give ourselves enough credit for any success and surviving it all. And I’m not alone in this.

Misswho

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[Tiddler]

time was and is totally meaningless to me. I don’t understand it. I think weeks have passed since an event and it’s been a year, or I think it’s been months and 10 years have gone past. I just can’t get to grips with how long ago my memories are unless I can root them in the time frame of a bigger event that I know happened at a certain point.

It’s not just my past that confuses me. Now is an issue too. I have a conversation with my hsuband and I think an hour has passed and it’s been 10 minutes or I think I’ve been working on something for an hour and it’s been 10 minutes.

Once, when our eldest child was young, we decided to have a go at ‘controlled crying’ to help him learn how to sleep. We said we’d wait 5 minutes before going to him. We sat and waited when he began crying. I listened to him and began thinking about whether I was doing the right thing, what he was feeling with no-one going to him, his cry began to really get to me and I eventually stood up and said I just couldn’t do it. It was FAR too long for me to sit listening to that.

My husband told me a whole 7 seconds had passed.

Nope. Time and I are not good friends.

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