when is it too late to do start therapy for ADD??

[bedelia]

I attended a convention on learning disabilities recently, because I am involved with a literacy council–as a tutor, and also on its board of directors. Rick Green made his incredible presentation, which was simply overwhelming for me. Thank you so much, Rick, for opening up this whole can of worms for me. I recognized all the symptoms as he was speaking, and promptly bought his DVD–ADD and liking it?! I have watched it three times, and have visited the website and am just realizing how much info is there for me. I took two tests from your site, and both indicated that I probably had a pretty heavy case of ADD.

I won’t go into all my indications, but I can say that it is getting worse. My whole adult life has been a turmoil, but I have also accomplished quite a bit. Now I seem to be on a wild goose chase all the time, accomplishing very little. I am surrounded by unfinished projects. My To Do list grows longer and longer. My phone rings constantly. I am panic stricken when I stop to look at that list or answer the calls.

This week, because it is “holiday” time, and I do not have a schedule, I am running around like a wet hen all day–I haven’t even got dressed today–I stay up all night reading, and sleep all morning–forget to do the essential things, and find so many other fascinating things to start. I had to force myself to get back to this website, (“go to totallyadd.com” has been on my to do list for a month) because I feel my answers are here somewhere. It helps already, knowing that this is my problem. I thought it might be Alzheiners.

I should mention that I am a recovering alcoholic, sober for 31 years, and have always wondered why it is taking me so long to become perfect . . . my character defects get worse in some incidences. My father was the same. Quite a few others who are recovering alcholics seem to have the same symptoms. I hired a personal organizer for a while, but eventually I could not afford her. But I have explained to her that probably many of her clients have this disability, and she would be wise to visit your website and buy the DVD, too.

My big problem is, I am 75 years old!! Maybe it’s too late. Do I want to spend hours with therapists? Can I take the medication at this late point in my life? And where will I find someone who can help me–way out in the boonies where I live. As I have been telling people for ages–I am a very busy person! I am doing volunteer work for four diffferent organizations–taking a leading role in most of them. And I am not doing a great job at any of them now because of the time and energy problems! Do I want to spend the rest of my life, whether it be twenty years, or two, running in circles accumulating more and more stuff and never having a moment’s peace. I would like to learn how to retire.

Not sure what tags are, so I’ll leave that alone. I hope this ends up somewhere where there are some people who know what I’m talking about, and can offer some suggestions. Thanks again, Rick and Patrick and everyone else who cares.

Cheers,

Bedelia

So it would interest me to know whether there are other “elderly” ADDers, and how they are coping. What can I do? I will start by watching all those videos and reading the articles. What next?

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[Anonymous]

It’s never too late I say. Talk with a Doctor and see what would be a good fit for you.

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[Anonymous]

I just turned 70 and because of my 11 year old grandughter I looked at myself. We are very much the same except she is much brighter and can spell!!! I have learned so much from her and her parents. I also wonder if it is late for me to start this process. I am moving again to be near my family….lost another husband to divorce. I just can’t seem to get connected to people other than one of my sons and his family. Depression and anxiety are almost always there. I am also a recovering alcoholic,27 years.It is 3pm…still in my pj’s and dreading getting dressed to go out tonight! I have done many things in my life and done them well but never stick with anything…..I get the need to move on to something new.

My question too, is it too late for help and what would that look like?

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[Anonymous]

Me too.

I’m 50 going on 20. A dr. told me 10 years ago I had ADHD and suggested medication… But why in the world would I want to do that?

If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it… I was on top of the world! I never came up against anything I couldn’t conquer! There was absolutely nothing I couldn’t do if I put my mind to it……. There you have it….. put my mind to it….. I had been successful in every career path (not “job”) I chose, till I mastered it and became the best in my group or area… Then loosing interest, getting bored and just not showing up emotionally and eventually physically, jump right into my next adventure….

Yes life was GRAND and I had no intentions of changing a thing about myself…. So I had been married 5 times, my husbands were all idiots and didn’t understand me… (could I be wrong?)

Now for the last 18 months, I’ve been stuck. I’ve run through some muddy patches before but never this deep or wide or seemingly impassable. Last month I decided to remove all the clutter from my life. I boxed up items from my home, garage and shop and carried them to my pasture and deposited them in a huge pile. Now for the month of December, it is an every day event for me to think of an item in the giant pile at night while I don’t sleep and dwell on all the possibilities of this particular item. The next day, there I am out digging through the pile searching for a thimble with the Texas state flag stamped on the side….

I’m unable to make up my mind on practically anything anymore and if I do I change my mind before the decision has a chance to take effect…

medication 10 years ago may have been the best decision but I can tell you for sure, I don’t want to spend any more of my life like I am now!!!

I had completely dismissed and forgotten my Dr.’s diagnosis 10 years ago, then I caught their ADD and loving it on public TV today.

Maybe there is a light at the end of the tunnel?

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[bedelia]

Well, Always Moving, we sound like twins! I think I have stopped moving, and have given up on marriage or even living with another human being. I have 2 dogs and 2 cats who appreciate me and forgive me when I get the crazies. We’re all going to sit in front of the TV tonight and drink ginger ale, and then get to bed at a decent hour. I’m hoping someone who reads this forum will come up with some good idea to help me (us) change–fast, because I don’t have much time to lose! Does that sound like ADD or not! Shane G. who commented on my share suggested I go to my doctor and ask for help. I’m afraid she will just laugh! But maybe that’s what I need to do–ask to be referred to a therapist who can help. I live way out in the country and we don’t have many specialists here, but I am willing to go to the city if I have to.

I am really happy to meet some others like me. It is encouraging. I am still amazed at what I have discovered. It never crossed my mind that I might have ADD but now it all makes so much sense–I keep remembering things that I did years ago, that shsould have been a warning.

Can someone explain to me what are tags? I’m not much of a tecky.

Happy New Year everyone–let’s hope for a haappy, healthy 2011.

Bedelia

Bedelia

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[Anonymous]

I would say that it’s never too late to begin. I’m 25 but I’ve have ADHD my entire life and I’m in and out of my own personal therapy from time to time. I use my therapy time to come to terms with the effect of ADHD on my life and my beliefs/feelings in dealing with it. I’ve found that most of the “practical tips” that the therapist has given me has been of little use because I’ve learned to cope with a lot of my behaviors over the years in my own way. So in my, admittedly brief, experience I’ve found that therapy can help you begin to deal with the emotions of ADHD in a relatively brief amount of time. Hours upon hours of intensive therapy may not be in need at all because the main ingredient for positive growth is in the individual themselves. I would suggest contacting local mental health organizations or your family physician and see what their opinion is.

P.S.

I believe the “tag” system is where you put a variety of words (adhd, age, getting help, etc) that briefly sum up your post. This way the site is more effective for searching. Key words i guess.

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[Anonymous]

I agree with adam it is never too late

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[Anonymous]

I am 53. Everyone in my family got divorced. I am on a roll but had many times when inside I wanted to not be married, I just wanted to be alone and wallow in loneliness for some reason, it was a regular thing for me. I am usually positive and….well if you are reading this you know. Then I discovered that I got all of the answers correct and got a 100% on every ADD and ADHD test I took. Great, another thing to put on my resume of things I do well….I think. I love my wife sooo much and we have been together for so long (21years) that it was the only thing in my entire life that I stuck with, though it is addmittedly not easy sometimes but I can actually now say it was me not her. But I wanted to finish up to the “until death do us part” part. I believe that the intervention I have to stay with her is totally handled by God and always has been. I’m no biblethumper but I can’t handle all of the things in my life. I felt as if I was coming to the end of the internet and was reading some of the last pages and was losing interest in many things, see my journey from Seattle and follow and please comment so we can all heal. I thought it was too late but I have to put it behind me somehow. I AM ALSO INTERESTED IN HEARING FROM PEOPLE THAT HAVE GREAT HEARING BUT HAVE DIRECTIONAL HEARING DIFFICULTIES HEARING ANY PEOPLE TALK CLEARLY. I CAN HEAR THE QUIET CEILING FAN BUT MY WIFE SOUNDS LIKE SHE TALKS TOO FAST AND MUMBLES, SHE DOESN’T DO THAT IN REALITY. I HAVE ALWAYS BEEN TOLD THAT I TALK TOO LOUD BUT HAVE TROUBLE HEARING MY OWN VOICE IN MY HEAD. WENT AND GOT TOTAL HEARING DIAGNOSES AND THEY FOUND A MILD DROP IN THE FREQUENCIES THAT CARRY HUMAN VOICE, WAS TOLD THAT HEARING IS ESSENTIALLY FANTASTIC BUT TO ME IT IS NOT WORKING QUITE RIGHT. I CAN’T STOP TALKING ON THIS SITE, SOMEONE MEDICATE ME QUICKLY PLEASE.

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[Anonymous]

I am 68 and wondered the same thing: is it too late. But I have decided I have to get some help because I, too, am getting worse. Earlier in my life, I functioned pretty well because my “plate was full” raising six kids and then later, teaching. I had to do what I had to do. It took me much longer than other people to prepare lessons etc, but I managed.

However, now that I have more free time, I’m a total disaster!!! My house is beginning to look like something off “Hoarders” and, as much as I try, I can’t seem to make any headway cleaning it up.

Is my family doctor where I should go first. I live in a rural area with no psychiatrist within 50 miles and even then, there are only 3 half time psychiatrists in that small city. My doctor and I have disagreed about a lot of things lately and I’m not sure he will take me seriously. Any advice for me?

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[billd]

Wow, someone else who feels it’s getting worse for them!

ME TOO! 54, fed up, had it, can’t get good help, takes weeks or months, then they want you to wait for an appointment to see ANOTHER one down the line. They said that the last appointment was to decide and start meds – now they’ve changed their tune. There’s even argument over diagnosis, even though the “family doctor” said yes and tried a med, then took me off it, then the next person said yes, was supposed to prescribe a med, but the sleep doctor beat her to it, so the ADHD person wouldn’t prescribe, now the sleep doc has taken me off meds – and the aDHD person still won’t directly deal with it…………….and all i get is a NURSE when I try to call and get things straightened out, and she tells me a different story.

The medical profession down here is in shambles, and getting worse now.

No one in the states knows squat about ADULT ADHD. (stress the adult part)

Ya know what my doctor asked me of all things ? “you’ve lived with it this long all these years, why bother with it now”

I wanted to slug the insensitive jerk!

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[Anonymous]

I have a cut-to-the-chase solution that may be illuminating for those who are reasonably certain they have ADD or ADHD and can’t get the treatment they need. This solution is for someone who wants to try medication. It took me almost eight years after I first suspected I had ADD to request medication. I regret every minute I waited. When I got to the point of requesting medication, I was so exhausted with ADD that I could barely get up in the morning. I simply could not cope anymore.

1. Take responsibility for both the diagnosis and the outcome. I do not recommend self-diagnosis, but I had no other option at the time.

2. Try Dr. Jain’s virtual diagnosis and/or the 100 questions in Dr. Hallowell’s book Driven to Distraction. Both are excellent. I like Dr. Jain’s a little better as he pins down the “restless” part of ADD which I have to an extreme and never noticed as I am not hyperactive; my tells are the tapping foot, twitchiness waiting in line, impatience while driving and so on.

3. If the results of either or both are conclusive to your mind, go to your family doctor with your reasoning well thought out. Please be very respectful of your doctor throughout this process.

4. Here is where you need to be sure of yourself: request medication to test out your theory. I used the following reasons:

– By the diagnostic tests I was certain I had ADD (I repeat, I know self-diagnosis is not ideal, it’s just that there is no one expert who can diagnose it in my community!)

– I asked my doctor if trying Wellbutrin was medically feasible for me. This is your doctor’s decision! Be very careful not to step on toes here. Fortunately my doctor was compassionate and respected me.

– I wanted to try Wellbutrin before Ritalin as Wellbutrin is slow release, does not affect your sleep habits and quite stable throughout the day (i.e. It doesn’t wear off the way Ritalin does). I recommend requesting Wellbutrin first; Ritalin is a street drug and your request may be taken the wrong way if your doctor does not agree with your self-diagnosis.

– My doctor did not agree that I had ADD; she felt that I was too successful in life and had no learning disabilities which so often go with ADD (B.A., held down jobs successfully for long term, no evident hyperactivity).

– I was able to articulate why I was successful in coping so far with ADD: I used a form of mental “Red alert!” to focus myself. It brought up my heart rate, put me into fight or flight and I was able to focus. Unfortunately I had run out of adrenaline, and when I said “Red alert!” to myself, all I felt was, “Yeah, whatever.” And all this strategy allowed me to do was hyper-focus. I didn’t recognize that was almost equally problematic in terms of a life strategy.

– My doctor was not convinced and sent me to a psychiatrist for a diagnosis, which came back as a mild form of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. She gave me a list of symptoms. She was quite correct: it fitted like a glove. She told me to take the list and think about it for a week.

– When I came back the next week, I explained she was right, but she was zeroing on my adaptation, not my issue. In other words, I used a touch of OCD to get through my day. It gave me a tiny bit of structure that my chaotic life lacked. It took iron discipline for me to get up and out the door every day on time – that was where the apparent OCD came in.

– The psychiatrist disagreed, but based on my end-of-the-rope feelings, she agreed to prescribe Wellbutrin (bupropion – there are several commercial names) and see me weekly to assess.

The outcome was that when I woke up in the morning when I was finally on full dose of slow release Wellbutrin, I cried for the better part of an hour. Why? I could think!!!! There aren’t enough exclamation marks to express what I felt. I could direct my thoughts on command. For the first time in my entire life, I came out of a shower without conditioner in my hair. ADD kidnapped me during the course of every shower. Somehow I could manage soap and shampoo, but conditioner did me in. Every single time I came out of a shower, I ran my hands through my hair, felt conditioner and had to turn the shower back on and get back in. This was my “test” behaviour that validated the diagnosis. I think you need one, although simply waking up without having your thoughts hijacked is probably enough!

One final note: I am both an artist and a writer (professionally). Both IMPROVED after I started with Wellbutrin, especially writing fiction (in advertising I write much shorter pieces). I can now hold a plot long enough in my mind to get it down. The fear of losing my creativity is what held me back from meds for so long; dang! I wish I could have those years back.

P.S. I am now 58. It’s never too late to feel this good!

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