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Yet another do I have it post.

Yet another do I have it post.2018-07-09T12:14:00+00:00

The Forums Forums Ask The Community Yet another do I have it post.

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  • #130720

    bronxand
    Participant
    Post count: 2

    Y’all. I’m back in school for my RN and we’re reviewing ADHD and as I was going through the lecture, I kind of felt like the symptoms we’re describing me. I want to talk to my doctor about it, but I’m so hesitant and nervous. The fact I’m in school I don’t want to seem I’m grubbin for meds. Second, I think I don’t want to face the realization of the possibility that I don’t have ADD, and that I’m just lazy and unmotivated.

    I don’t have any of the criteria of the DSM-5 under hyperactivity/ impulsivity, but I identify with 5 for the criteria for Inattention. The more I read about symptoms and the experiences of people with ADD, the more I feel like I might have something, but when I talk with my co-workers they say they experience the same shit too and tell me I’m just overthinking. Which makes me feel like shit cuz i feel like it’s as if, oh okay so I’m struggling with these things cuz of no reason…

    I dunno what kind of responses I’m looking for, as a nurse, I always tell my patients to have that talk with their doctor to at least open the conversation. I guess I’m just nervous about facing the stigma or possibility that I just need to be better.

    I put in so much hours trying to study but I can’t seem to stick with the studying. I just sit in tte library or at work looking for other things to do. This is kind of how I’ve been I think, and I’ve always thought that I just didn’t want to be I’m school enough and that the pressure of last minute deadlines was what I needed to be motivated. The criteria about being hyoerfocused on specific tasks spoke out to me too. I would spend 12 hours cleaning the house instead of studying. I would reorganize my whole closet instead of doing other things like my fixing my car registration (still not paid heh) or paying my bills. The biggest thing that stuck out to me was the symptoms of often losing things. I always lose my wallet, my keys and such. It would literally be in my hand and I walk to the door and I realize I don’t know where I set it down. Everyone loses their keys and wallet so ifnigured it was a normal thing.

    That’s just a little bit of how I identify with the posted symptoms.

    I tell my friends about what I’m feeling and reading about and they laugh and say they do those things too. So I really really don’t know if I am overthinking things or if it’s something I truly need to bring up with my MD.

    I guess I’m just looking for people to sound off about their personal experiences and if anyone can let me know if I’m tripping over nothing.

    Thanks team! I appreciate your time

    • This topic was modified 5 years, 9 months ago by bronxand.
    • This topic was modified 5 years, 9 months ago by bronxand.
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    #130741

    sdwa
    Participant
    Post count: 363

    A lot of what you describe sounds familiar to me, and I have the “inattentive” sub-type of ADHD (ADD). In school, I would find myself reading the same passages over and over, and wouldn’t be able to concentrate long enough to process or remember what I’d read. I’m very good at doing almost anything but what I should be doing, but also at putting enormous pressure on myself to do more than is humanly possible because I’m not so great at estimating how long it actually takes to do things. Nevertheless, I was a good student, somehow able to cram and remember everything I’d learned just long enough to pass an exam with flying colors…yet still feel like I don’t know anything because I can’t recall that information at will, necessarily. Some days I would be brilliant, and other days my mind would be garbage. I always thought I was “lazy, crazy, or stupid.” I’m still very sensitive to people thinking I’m stupid, not taking me seriously, thinking I’m a flake or an airhead. All through high school people thought I was on drugs, but I wasn’t. Sometimes, when I’m passionate about a project, I can focus for a 12-hour stretch, forget to eat. Constantly misplacing things, rearranging my bookshelf from largest to smallest so the books look like a perfect staircase, vivid nightmares that feel like an alternate reality, a high level of emotional sensitivity to light, sound, crowds…startle easily. But I also have dysthymia and have struggled with recurring major depression since adolescence. One of my favorite ADHD moments involved leaving my keys in the ignition in a running vehicle while I went grocery shopping (car NOT stolen!). Unmedicated, I’m depressed, moody, emotionally volatile, easily thrown off, tend to go from one activity to another like a butterfly traveling flower to flower, meandering, no particular destination because I wouldn’t think that far ahead. I will never be a chess player, because I can’t hold in my working memory a projection of the next six to nine possible moves. I remember what I see better than what I hear. I also used to drink about 10 cups of coffee a day.

    When I first tried ADD meds, I found that I was far less sensitive to my environment, able to look people in the eye and talk to them, and that the background mental radio finally shut up. The meds don’t make me high, or hyper – they relax me.

    I wouldn’t be embarrassed to talk to a doctor about it. Hopefully the doctor has a clue about ADHD. What other people think doesn’t matter. It is not their life, and they are not struggling with the same issues.

    Lately, I’ve switched to a high protein, very low carb diet, and find that my energy level stays more even, I can think when I want to – and they say this is a better diet for ADDers, so you might try it and see how it affects you.

    But yeah, just see a doctor, preferably one who has experience with ADHD.

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    #130748

    bronxand
    Participant
    Post count: 2

    Keto?

    Thanks for the encouragement. It’s comforting to know that I’ might not just being a book about this

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    #131098

    jlacroix
    Participant
    Post count: 7

    I have the inattentive type too, not so much in the realm of impulsivity. When I saw my recent therapist, he had me fill out two observation forms about myself, how I feel I am now, and how I feel I was at 10 years old to the best of my memory. He also had me have two other people fill out a questionnaire about me too. When you read the DSM or online info, it can be misleading. You can have one of the symptoms and not know it. I was talking to my son about it, and I told him something about the fact that I have most of the symptoms but I don’t cut people off while talking or finish their sentences for them. He looked at me with a serious look, and said “yes you do!” so yeah, you can’t just go by your own observations of yourself. Since diagnosed, memories of my past resurface in a new light, where I have a better understanding of things I didn’t think were symptoms but always were (for example, forgetfulness). It’s easy to excuse some symptoms, and say to yourself “I haven’t had much sleep” or some other excuse.

    I agree with the previous person about seeing a therapist with a specialty in ADHD. I wasted a few years getting nowhere with a few therapists, until I found my recent one, which made a HUGE difference and confirmed my suspicions that I have it.

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    #131126

    siggipiggi4
    Participant
    Post count: 3

    I identify with every issue you have. Three days ago i lost my keys and me and my parents literally turned my room upside down, when we at last gave up and got a copy made, i found my keys in my backpocket of the jeans i was wearing…

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