[raymond]

OK folks I have done it. I have joined a forum that I actively participate in……..something that I don’t do. I have been reviewing many sites over the last years regarding ADD and its debilitating effects on some people. Let me give you the readers digest version of my 64 years of life. My childhood was not perfect and neither was I. I married at 19 years old and had 3 children. Divorced after 27 years and remarried and had another child with my new wife. My career choices were all over the board and normally revolved around heavy physical work. Now I am in a unique position where I am able to look back on my life and the people that have come into and out of it. I was told I have ADD when I was 27 years old. It was a professional opinion back when no one used the phrase ADD. I was humiliated that I had something that made me different than everyone else even though I knew I was different than everyone else. That same person also informed me that it WAS NOT a disease but instead something unique and went on to describe the effects to a “T” that I had experienced my entire life. I was able to understand more fully what the “gift” was and learned how to use it to my advantage.

I have read so many posts from ADD people who are really depressed and disturbed by the effects. ENOUGH!!!!! It is depressing to not be functional as the rest of the “normal” people if you let it take that form. I was 49 years old when I was driving down a freeway when I heard an ad on the radio about volunteers needed to test a new drug for ADD personalities. I wrote the phone number down and got my initial interview that day. My reasoning is if they had a drug that could help kids with ADD as well as adults I am the first one you want to try it out on. If there was anything that could help people with the effects I wanted to jump in and prove it worked. In the interview they asked alot of questions and I had to fill out a couple of questionnaires. After that they had me come back and have a blood draw. Then I was scheduled for an interview with a psychologist and yet another interview with the psychologist and a psychiatrist along with the two nurses that had started me in the process. So there I was sitting in front of this distinguished panel that asked me all types of questions at varying levels of intelligence. I listened carefully and answered each question as best as I could. I was fine with all of it until they lowered the level of the conversation and questions to a level that I thought was immature on their behalf. At the end of the session they were ready to dismiss me when I said “now its my turn” and stared at them coldly. They asked me what I meant and I said “I have questions for you”. They were surprised but sat down and let me go on with my questions. My first question was “How many of you have been diagnosed with ADD”? Before they could answer I told them “Exactly none of you have ADD” They were somewhat startled by the question and the answer. They admitted that none of them individually had been diagnosed with ADD. My next questions was “So if you don’t have ADD how can you even think you know the effects of it”? Folks the doctors who diagnose you as having ADD are clinically diagnosing you based upon studies that are not perfect , related or inclusive. I was dropped from the study because I turned 50 before it started but I can tell you that the conversation we had that day lasted 3 hours with the first half hour being them asking me questions and the last 2.5 hours being me asking them questions which they struggled to answer. I was asked to follow up with another panel because of my insight into ADD but never followed through with it. Mostly because they were interested in trying to figure out why I had the thought patterns I have which all ADD people have to one degree or another and to explain it to a person without ADD is next to impossible. They can’t follow my explanations and bore me to death with the need for further explanation or more detailed explanation.

Folks I have to ask what is the one thing in particular we all have in common? I can hear the onslaught of depression , scattered thoughts , unable to keep a schedule and on and on. No that is not the answer. What we all have in common is the link we share in identifying with each other. Place 1,000 people in a convention center of which only two have ADD and we will gravitate towards each other by the end of the function. Brings new meaning to the old adage as kids that we used to hurl at each other “Takes one to know one”. We are at our best when we are in company of each other. Why? Because we are able to communicate many thoughts in a conversation that seems foreign to people without ADD. We can cover a variety of subjects in a very short amount of time between us that other non-ADD folks can’t comprehend. It is they who have a affliction not us. It does not mean we are a superior race or super intelligent but we have a capability to cover alot of ground between us that they can’t. We don’t use all of the “flowery” descriptive words they use to make a point. With us its ABC not the entire alphabet to describe a red rose. Excessive use of language in describing something is nerve racking to us. Everyone loves a commentator who has a command of the language and speaks eloquently but seriously folks if a rose is red then that’s it , to take 30 minutes to describe the color of a red rose is nonsense and non productive. We and I am speaking to you…..are very deep thinking people who do not place a lot of time in solving something from every angle like many do. Yes there are circumstances where that approach is necessary in life…..a heart surgeon planning a operation is a prime instance. I don’t know of any ADD surgeons in practice. We make mistakes just like everyone else does……..but we are harder on ourselves for making those mistakes than non-ADD people. Why? Because we don’t tolerate failure very well…..that’s why. We are not perfectionists but we want it done the right way the first time. Repetition and mundane situations drive us up the wall. We are about change not stagnation or status quo. We are viewed as impulsive , intolerant , slow witted at times and many other adjectives. We really are not at all. What we are is a people trying to succeed in a world of people that don’t understand our abilities. We are very creative and dynamic if left to our own resources. It’s the constant put down from those around us that is demeaning and becomes depressive…..if you let it happen. You have what I have……the ability to observe and solve many problems all at once if you let it happen. In my mind there is 9 large screen TV’s if you will and each of them has a separate problem that I am working on simultaneously. I can’t focus on anyone of them individually but as my mind works them out I will view that “TV set” and see the resolve to the problem. You are the same way……trust me I have many ADD friends who once they realize they have this capability they use it to their advantage. I don’t think drugs of any kind will help a ADD person. They may suppress the anxiety and make you feel like you fit in but its only temporary unless you take another pill. Your mind is capable of so many things just let it rip. Why would you want to be single focused on a problem when you can solve many at a time?

ADHD is something I do not agree with at all as a accurate diagnosis and I am a firm believer that it is applied inappropriately. Yep people can be hyperactive…..I know many that are and they are not ADD. Just another point that the doctors giving the diagnosis do not have a personal feel for the effects of ADD and do their assessments from a clinical viewpoint instead of experience. Hyperactivity can be related to many things not ADD. I am dismayed that the medical profession has allowed themselves to label us as they have and corral everyone into a corner so that more funding can be generated to conduct more studies. We are not mentally deficient in any way instead we are very attuned to many things at once that make us different. Over the years that I have reviewed many posts from ADD people it is easy to pick out the ones who really have ADD. Its not their misspelling of words or their descriptions of maladies they are experiencing it is instead their manner and style of writing. Many people are diagnosed with ADD or ADHD as they now like to call it and they are not at all ADD. If you go to the doctor and state that you are depressed , can’t focus , have no energy to accomplish anything , have lost your friends and job the first diagnosis is depression or manic depression. If the mood makers for that don’t work then your probably going to be referred for ADD testing if you can afford it. Depression is something that everyone experiences in life and is brought on many different factors. Truth is folks people with ADD are unique when it comes to drugs……they don’t like or tolerate anything that attempts to alter their mind or thought patterns very well. I have in my life known many alcoholics that are ADD……they don’t like to be drunk but it is a comfortable place for them as it is disorganized and mimics the effects of ADD. They never learned how to use ADD to their advantage and if they did they quickly found out that they don’t like the effects of alcohol or drugs. We are very unique in that way.

I don’t sell a motivational video for ADD people or a supplement that’s supposed to cure it or anything like that. I am 64 years old and have a lifetime of experience with ADD. If it had not been for some of the people who I met through life that actually had ADD themselves showing me how to use it to my advantage I doubt I would be able to identify openly with ADD. It is all in how you view it. I for one refuse to look at it as a discouraging aspect of my life but instead a positive thing that I can turn on and off as I need to. Don’t let it bring you down folks let it bring you upwards. I’ll monitor this site from time to time and am willing to post further information as to my experiences if you want to hear about them. Thanks for listening.

Raymond

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