The Forums › Forums › Emotional Journey › Self Medicating/Risk Taking › Name that feeling! › Re: Name that feeling!
I have felt that itch as well. My itch is usually when things go wrong. I just figured out something. I am hiding from living because I don’t want to go back to dealing with things going wrong so I do nothing. Do nothing and nothing can go wrong right? That is actually wrong as well. I had a very bad day. I got pulled over because of no brake lights. My insurance had expired and my car got towed. I lied to the cop about my insurance but I was so stressed that I said the first thing that came into my head. I didn’t have my registration with me. I cried for a couple of hours and Jessica’s friends have been helping me. I got the insurance fixed but now I have no food money for the next two weeks.
I shut down for a while. I drank two beers and had dinner and that itch started itching bigger. I feel really bad. I want to explode then the panic starts. I DID SOMETHING WRONG. My whole life I have been scared of doing something wrong, but then my whole life I didn’t know about my ADD. I want to explode. I want to run. I want to eat a whole cake. I want to take a bottle of Benadryl to fall asleep and maybe not wakeup again. I am cut off from all my usual video games, have been for a while. My only outlet that I have with me (can’t get home right now) is my needlepoint that is almost finished. I probably only have about an hour of work left and I wanted to stretch it before I put the final touches on it.
How can I stop this without drugs or doing something destructive?
REPORT ABUSE