The Forums › Forums › Emotional Journey › My Story › 26 years of my life feel like a complete waste ADD, oh yay, lucky me! › Re: 26 years of my life feel like a complete waste ADD, oh yay, lucky me!
Anonymous
@ Toofat Thanks for the reply. I’m not sure if you missed the fact that there’s a 99% chance that I have Predominantly Inattentive ADD + Severe Social Anxiety, Generalized Anxiety, and Major Depressive Disorder, as well as headaches, and a few drug dependencies. Eating healthy requires money, it’s hard enough paying rent as it is let alone spending $20 dollars per meal lol. Therefore I can’t just flip a switch and become happy-go-lucky as your seeming to imply, unless I comprehended what you were trying to get across the wrong way. And like I said before I am taking St. Johns Wort, and Ginko Biloba for brain circulation and Mood Support. Those are cheap enough to where I can afford them (off brand dollar store) same exact thing if you ask me.)
The exercising is hard for me because I would have to get out and then I’d worry about everyone looking or watching me and what they were thinking (this has been a lifelong issue and I can’t just get over it or quit thinking about it.) It’s an automatic response. I could do it inside, however all I do inside in my room is 15 pushups 5-6 days a week. I’m so skinny that I have to start low and build myself up before I start overexerting myself. My father died at 44 last March, because of overexertion that caused a blood clot to go to his brain (aneurism that killed him.) He exercised all the time, didn’t do drugs, besides some red wine here and there, ran marathons, rode a bike for miles, etc. So considering all of that hasn’t helped me much either considering I don’t want to overexert but what I’ve always believed is everything in moderation is best. For all I know I could die around his age as well if not before then. Me and my dad were just alike in a lot of ways, as well as looking like one another to a T. Because of my failure to show emotions I handled his death pretty easily so that has nothing to do with any of my issues, I’ve had these issues since I was a kid.
I do appreciate the posts and everyone’s opinions I just thought i’d get that out if you haven’t read all of my posts on here, which explain a lot about me. So no, i’m not one of those who complain about having my issues for 6 months lol, I’ve actually dealt with these issues my entire life, and if it was so easy to get over wouldn’t I have done that by now? I used to want to be a Nutritionist, so i’m not uneducated when it comes to eating right, exercising etc. Another part of my issues is that I give up extremely easily, and it’s hard for me to stick to something. A lot of it I think has to due with instant gratification, I am extremely impatient so if I don’t see any results in 3 days I tend to say screw it and give up, of course I need to work on that but I think a lot of that has to do with the ADD perhaps, and it’s hard to overcome those personality traits without help.
I hope I covered everything there, I should go eat so I can take my morning St Johns and Ginko this morning before I forget. 😯
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