It’s not like I’m late on purpose. I don’t get ready on time and sit back and think to myself, “I’m ready to go now, but I think I’ll keep those people waiting. &*%##%** them!”
I think living alone with pets adds a dimension to the problem that I wouldn’t have otherwise. But getting a housemate and getting rid of the animals is not an option. It just isn’t. I’m 51 years old, I’ve done the marriage thing, the roommate thing, the living at a relative’s house thing, and I like my independence. I love my animals. They are better friends to me than most people I know.
A typical morning when I have to go into the city for work goes like this:
Wake up
Potty
Feed animals
Eat breakfast
Take meds
Shower
Brush teeth, put in contact lenses
Dry hair
Get dressed
Change to another outfit
Look in the mirror
Change to another outfit
Discover a huge stain right on the front
Change to a fourth outfit
Look at the clock
Panic
Potty again (because I cannot leave the house unless I do it just before I go)
Realize that I didn’t put some food out for the cats to eat in case I am late getting home
Go outside
Realize that I picked a jacket that was too light for the weather (this happens a lot during seasonal changes)
Go back inside and get the correct jacket
Go back outside
Remember something that I needed for work
Go back inside and get it
Go back outside
Realize that I forgot to check the knobs on the stove to make sure they are off
See something else that needs to be taken care of right away
Go potty again
Grab a bottle of water out of the fridge
All of that can take up to 2.5 hours or more from start to finish. OK, so that list up there is somewhat exaggerated, but the fact of the matter is that I have been blessed not only with ADHD, but a certain amount of OCD as well. I cannot leave without checking to make sure the hair dryer is unplugged, the stove is off, that the cats have water in their bowl, that the door is locked, etc., etc. (Didn’t you watch that movie where Rick was going through a routine like that? That one really hit home with me.)
So anything involving the welfare, safety or happiness of my pets takes priority over anything else I have to do. I’m sorry if that offends anyone, but that’s the way it is. If I left the stove on and the house burned down and my pets perished, I would be devastated.
The thing is, all of that is overwhelming and stressful and panic-inducing for me. I will do my level best to be on time, but I never know what’s going to happen to derail my good intentions. This is me, it’s who I am, and how dare anyone say that I am wrong for doing the best I can? I simply won’t accept that. If your time is so valuable, maybe we shouldn’t be making appointments to meet up.
One thing I do actively do is to avoid making important appointments too early in the morning. When the doctor’s office asks, “Can you come in at 9?” I reply with “what have you got in the afternoon?”.
Winning. 