Sorry to hijack your posts, but what you are feeling is not untypical of those of us who have been recently diagnosed. Yep, our lives for the most part looks like a train wreck, but look on the positive side. You now know…and that, my friend, is half the battle. You are in a position to enact some powerful changes that will affect the REST of your life. Right now.
I used to ruminate on all my baggage and how “if I only knew” or ‘why didn’t someone tell me earlier” and I found it was burning up energy I could use to dig my way out.
Actually, you caught me on a good day. Still have bad days. A lot. But fewer now…I keep telling myself “This, too, shall pass” And I was never able to tell myself that before.
There is a lot of help out there. (I know, because I have been a “consumer” most of my life). Do what ever you need to do, whether counseling through Family Services, or your Doctor, a priest, reverend, rabbi, imam or shaman. There’s us, too. We have all been through it, or are going through it. And why I do it is because I KNOW things are gonna change. For the better.
Hope this helps….