Memzak, let me tell you something that my older sister told me years ago that ALWAYS sticks with me. She was in a verbal, emotional and extremely physically abusive relationship for over six years. Countless ER visits, court dates, leaving him only to be harrassed into coming back, it ran the whole gamut. My family watched as my wonderful, beautiful sister became a shell. Finally she was able to break free of him for good! I never really asked her for details because I felt that she had been degraded enough and didn’t need to relive everything for my benefit, but every now and again, she would tell me things that made my skin crawl, but a couple of years ago, we were talking and she said.
“You know, the things that he did to me physically heal. The cuts go away, I can get my teeth fixed. The things that he said to me, the way that he made me FEEL. That’s harder to shake.”
I think of all of the things that most of us here on this site endured because of ADD and ADHD and the way that we were put down and degraded and you wonder, how do most of us brush our teeth every day!!! Do not minimalize ANYTHING that you’ve been through! The abuse and the anticipation of abuse could be enough to send you through the roof.
We all have in our heads that domestic violence is the physical kind, but there are so many types of ways to control another human being that isn’t based in anything positive loving or nuturing. I totally agree with sugargremlin, you should find a counselor, a therapist, someone to help you. I’m sure that your latest experience with your car has done NOTHING for your self esteem or your current mental condition.
I can tell you that my last ‘legal situation’ with my car was a doozy that required me to borrow quite a bit of money from friends to get back on my feet, and yes, it sucked and made me feel worthless, but I remembered what a blessing it is that people are willing to help you and even if I couldn’t do the same thing for someone financially, I could pay it forward in other ways. It sounds completely new agey but it’s what keeps me going when the World wants to suffocate me.
Call the lawyer, get the information, go to the court dates and go from there. I spent the better part of six months dealing with my traffic citation (not a DUI, but man with the time and energy I put into it, you’d think that it was) I learned that NOTHING is as bad as yo make it in your head, but the attorney is there to guide you through the process. If I had not retained an attorney, my situation would have been much worse.
Keep us posted 