Thanks Pete 
The drinking was really fun. It was great to blow off some steam until I became paranoid, then depressed at the end. Bleh. I will DEFINITELY ALWAYS now take my meds, even if I dont feel like it. They kill that “itch”. *le sigh*
I didnt know about the tactile thing and ADD. Its just the same to me as being in a car without at least one window cracked open. I NEED AIR! That makes me feel a bit better. I just cant stand someone elses “air” and “heat” in my space. Not to mention how soft and gentle my son will touch my arm. I rather be pinched or slapped then have a gentle touch! Sounds odd, but I can’t take it. Oh!! That makes sense with me hating the feeling of my own hair on me when I shower… You know how we lose hair… I spend all my time picking my hair off me hahahaha
With my sis… I feel bad kicking her out. She is an adult yes, but she can’t drive, she doesnt have a job, nothing. My parents dont want her back there, and she does help out a lot, but at times yes… she can be more irritating than not. I understand shes not my responsibility, but shes my sister! Last night after posting this, my husband and I talked about it. How I felt she was trying to make me jealous, but I feel horrible about kicking her out on those terms, when I dont know her motives, and it could just be paranoia. He knows I trust him, so we agreed that when im not home hes just going to stay away from her and do his own thing with out making a big scene about it. I really am looking forward to her being here because shes my workout buddy, but i seems she doesnt understand the whole PERSONAL SPACE thing. I know my own insecurities come into play as well about not being able to be as organized as she is etc.
I have now made the choice to lay off the alcohol, I think thats what made me depressed and blow things up. Stay on the meds, and give her another chance. In the meantime, working on my own short comings… and think on what I value in life and want from it.
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