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Reply To: Dealing With Bullies

Reply To: Dealing With Bullies2013-12-10T20:53:51+00:00

The Forums Forums Emotional Journey Bullying Dealing With Bullies Reply To: Dealing With Bullies


Post count: 158

Hey, blackdog, I gotta call you on this one. No offense taken, I just like to set the record straight. “Don’t rely on the teachers to catch it on their own. Most don’t care enough to notice. Keep checking with your daughter and making sure she’s ok. And make sure she knows that she is the better person and that it doesn’t matter what that bully says.” Actually, I would say most of us care a whole lot. I did research a few years ago, and found one statistic that was very telling: teachers notice only 1 in 25 of bullying incidents. It’s simply impossible to monitor every single interaction between students over the course of the day. I actually tell students this statistic. I tell them it’s impossible for teachers to see everything (because they think we do!), and explain that is why it is SO important for bystanders to speak up. (And I have to tell you how proud I was of one of my students this week when he came to me to tell me he had seen *another* student “stand up” because a friend was being hurt.) We teach our kindergartens to recognize when they are capable of handling a problem on their own and when they need to seek adult help.
I like your advice though, and I’m glad Pandora went in to help her daughter. It may be more than once, since some of us are better at recognizing and responding to issues than others….it helps to keep advocating to keep the issue at the forefront if it doesn’t stop.
I don’t know all the answers, it is such a complex issue. But probably the #1 stressor for me on the job would be the thought of failing to give the right help to a student who needed it. We want them to be happy – and they don’t learn well if they aren’t. I welcome information from parents, because sometimes children’s worries don’t come out til the end of the day when they have had time to process. When that kind of information is shared, I keep a closer eye on interactions between those particular students.
Sorry, that’s way too much info for an off the cuff remark. I’m just a born peacenik who wants everyone to get along 🙂