Beating yourself up about your mistakes – especially if they affect others

[Anonymous]

Only inperfection expects perfection………….even from ourselve. We need to accept ourselves, do your best and then let it go. Why feel so guilty? Appreciate the positive intentions, be real and know that is all anyone can do. Take responsibilty for yourselfe , and let others do the same.

Trust your intutition, believe in your goodness and above all………………….”.Keep it Simple Stupid”

K.I.S.S luv a mom of 57 just dx and gets it finally!!

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[Deborah]

Hi Little Monkey,

I just saw this quote on facebook and thought of you, “Own your own feelings. Nobody else does. Accept that you don’t own the other person’s feelings. They do.” Deepak Chorpra

For sure easier said than done, but with practice, anything is possible. I saw another quote, I forget who said it, “Try something new three times. First to get over the fear of doing it, second to learn how to do it, and third to see if you like it.”

I’m having trouble logging into the webinar, I’II give it a third try Take care, Deb

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[Anonymous]

Haha I find it funny reading these sometimes because the important issue is always the first one and than I read all the other ones and want to comment on them. Classic. But seriously I have to go up and read again…………..

Your story is so relatable to mine it is scary.

I carry the same guilt issues and I believe everyone on here does but they just look at it differently. That is the beauty of individualistic power. Anyways the guilt I feel is so overwhelming at times. I am 26 and have finally started to see a counselor about all these issues and have come to the conclusion that because I have been put down my figures of authority my whole life I have been left with this sense of always wanting to make sure everyone around me is happy. IF they are not happy than it is my fault and I take that straight to heart.

I also know that I have created defence mechanisms for when I feel emotionally vulnerable. For example my gf and I have a great relationship and she deals well with my ADHD. However there are times in which something didnt go quite the way I expected it, And I go into to WW2 mode. I feel this overwhelming feeling of guilt and that because it didnt go as plan than nothign is going to go as planned. Then I start to get really worked up and begin to think nothign I do is right and I feel bad that she has to deal with such a shitty bf and tell her that she may as well break up with me because she can do better.

Than I feel guilty that I am beating my self up over this and getting rid of the girl I love all because I have this huge problem when things go wrong. I have been learning how to cope it day to day.

This probably isnt making sense. This is one of my problems hahaha, getting it from my head to the computer. If we were talking one on one I know you would be like aghhhhhhhhhhh im the same way, or id be like aghhhhhhhhhhhhhh I am the same way haha.

I think the important thing to remember so you do not beat your self up is what everyone has been saying. You can’t change the past. But you can deal with the future. I know you say you don’t take medication to control your ADHD. What do you do? Everyone needs to have some coping method. Otherwise you wouldn’t have issues. So I would suggest finding a method to control your obsessive thoughts towards guilt.

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[MK]

I too have a great deal of trouble when my issues due to adhd have impacted and inconvenienced others; caused hardship for others. When it happens, I feel lower than scum, I feel like hiding, I just want to go home. And although usually I can “wait 10 minutes and I’m feeling totally differently” – it takes me longer to come out of one of these events and the aftermath. I find it hard to forgive myself, especially if it is a goof I’ve made before, thus, I’m not learning from my mistakes. It seems like I never learn from experience, never learn from the same thing happening in the past. And I am a masters-degreed professional, smarter than the average bear, so to speak, but when this happens, I feel like a total worthless idiot…

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[billd]

There’s so many things we’d change if we lived our lives again,

So many things we would and would not do.

All the past mistakes we’ve made and the price that we have paid.

Oh, how we would live if we could start anew.

But there’s no going back and we can’t change the past,

Or turn back the hands of time.

Yesterday is history; tomorrow is a mystery,

And I know that only this moment is mine.

There are things we’d never try and tears we’d never cry,

If we had known the hill was far too steep.

We’d have never tumbled down or fallen in and drowned,

If we had known the river was so deep.

But there’s no going back and we can’t change the past,

Or turn back the hands of time.

Yesterday is history; tomorrow is a mystery,

And I know that only this moment is mine.

So it’s best if we forget the things we now regret,

For we can not go back and change the past.

Let us use those old mistakes, a better life to make,

And tomorrow we may find that dream at last.

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[Author]

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