help!

[Anonymous]

I need a fast solution, please help me. Im not yet diagnosed, but Im pretty sure I have ADHD..

Somehow I ended up as architecture student. I DONT HAVE ENOUGH WORDS TO DESCRIBE HOW DESPERATE I AM. I am talented, I have good ideas, I like almost everything about architecture, just somehow, I could not manage to do anything, not just by a deadline, but not at all. Not to mention my grades are way too low. My projects are always half-done.

To make a long story short, now I have my final project exam in a week and I just cant do anything right. I cant concentrate longer than, I dont know, like a 10 minutes, my mind is flying around, I am thinking about how should I redecorate my apartment, everything, everything, except what I should do. Anyway, you probably know what I am talking about. So if anyone knows any technique or whatever, that will make me concetrate fast, please respond! I need to make this done, otherway Im finished with my architecture studies…

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[Anonymous]

Joca90, Oh yeah, I recognize the panic in your words, and you’re right – I expect most of us can relate. Every time, I say “next time I won’t let this happen …” Ha!!

You don’t mention if you’re on any meds. If you’re not already on something, or even if you are, can you get to your doctor soon and either get a med increase or start on something? A friend of mine swears by seal oil – incredibly high in omega 3’s (from adult seals) – I did try it and found no noticable difference. She said she noticed the difference right away.

I wish you the very best of luck.

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[shutterbug55]

@Joca,

Normally I don’t give advise. I am going to break tradition.

Truth time:

If you are anything like me, you have taken on more than you can possibly handle and have done pretty well keeping your head above water, until something happened and you got overwhelmed. That house of cards came tumbling down. That is pretty much textbook ADD.

From your description of the situation, there is nothing you can do in the next couple weeks you have between now and the end of the quarter, that can make much of a difference to this situation. Tell your advisers what is going on. Tell them everything. Your ADD. Everything. Lay it all out for them and ask them if you can have some time to get your head screwed on straight. What do you have to loose?

Show them the portfolio that got you into the school in the first place and remind them of your passion for Architecture. Lay out a plan for them that will reduce your class load, which will show them progress toward a degree, and allow you to do a few things well. What do you have to loose?

Your alternative is to continue doing what you are doing and pray that you make some miraculous recovery that will save the quarter. Has that ever really worked in the past?

For me this whole (late) discovery of myself through the ADHD colored sunglasses, means not settling for something I can do and not doing what I want to do. It means going for what I want, but in a way that works with my ADHD. I still get to where I want to go eventually, but I do it differently than the normals out there.

Get meds, get treatment, and go back to the things you want to do in a way that works with your ADHD.

Good luck, Joca and godspeed.

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[Joca90]

Bellamom,

well, Im not on any kind of medicine.. I guess I should go to doctor and finish with it once for all.. I just never have time ahahha

I tried omega 3 before, nothing happend.. Thanks a lot, anyway..

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[Joca90]

shutterbug55,

You are so right… Ill try, although Im on a black list, for sure. Im still new to this, so Im not sure what is ADHDs way of doing architecture hahah, sounds impossible… Thanks a lot for advice, again…

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[shutterbug55]

Joca,

I was on a “Black List”, when I was trying to get my degree. I talked with the Dean of the school, and told him about all the cool things I learned, all the cool things I wanted to learn and all the cool things I wanted to do with those cool things. He saw my passion and sincerity, and was so shocked that someone was actually talking to him! I also asked him for his help. I did not demand he do anything, but asked him for his help to make it possible for me to succeed. He was VERY helpful and I was successful. I still talk to him to this day and send him letters filled with the cool things I get to do with the cool things I learned at his school.

I don’t know what the ADD way of doing Architecture is either, but I bet if you give yourself some time, you and your coaches will figure it out! When you are done… Could you design a house for me? (no joke. I really want a house designed for me)

You are going to do fine, Joca. Let them see the passionate you and ask them for their help.

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[Tiddler]

Oh I really do feel for you. I completely understand what you are going through.

First of all, this is fixable. You know what the problem is and that is the biggest step to overcoming it.

Secondly, you can ask for help. I was in exactly the same position as you over the last few months and I fixed it.

Here’s what happened:

I got overwhelmed. Completely and utterly. And my brain just switched off. Not a little bit. Completely. I couldn’t think at all. I even replied to my own post on here! It was close to my deadline and I just didn’t know how to do it and the harder I tried the worse it got.

So, I stopped. I mean completely. I got signed off work, I bailed out of as much of the home/mum/wife stuff as I could realistically manage and I rested. I rested my brain and my body and I didn’t try to do anything.

All I did was get my extension and deferral applications done and I had to ask for help with those.

Then I got medicated and I’m glad to say it worked.

THEN, when I was READY, I got to it.

I’m not there yet, but the huge piles of work that I couldn’t face are now just a pile of books and one bag of folders and the files all over the computer are found and contained in one folder and BACKED UP!

And I’m writing. It’s getting done.

So – YOU CAN DO IT – just:

Ask for help

Get extensions

Rest

Speak to your doctor

Get treatment if you need it and are able

Rest some more

And, when you’re ready, you’ll storm through it!

Hang in there!

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[Scattybird]

Hello Joca90 – you have one week to calm your mind and revise for your final exam. Presumably this exam is at the end of your degree? So will this exam make or break your degree result? If the answer is yes, then you need to take some action.

Assuming this is a seriously important exam and you don’t think you’ll ‘get it together’ in a week then you need to act now. You need to talk to your tutor, but I suggest you see him/her with some medical evidence, or at least a set of questions about your options.

Whether your tutors will help at this stage depends on how your University works and what the regulations are.

The University I work at has very strict rules when it comes to understanding that students might have difficulties. They are fair rules though, but if a student flunks an exam due to illness or an emotional issue, or doesn’t sit the exam then evidence needs to be provided. I would guess most have similar regs?

Since I don’t know the rules of your Uni it is difficult ….but assuming this exam really is make or break time, then I would suggest you go to your doctor or to the Uni Counsellor and have a complete meltdown.

Someone in the medical profession needs to be able to write to your tutor and the exam board stating that you are in no fit state to sit the exam if you don’t think you will be; or alternatively the doctor’s letter must say that you are suffering from severe stress and this must be taken into account at degree classification. That letter needs to be unambiguous. It’s no good if the letter says something like ‘Joca90 says she’s feeling stressed’. The letter must not leave any room for doubt. ‘Joca90 is suffering from debilitating stress and is not medically fit to sit the exam’ Get the idea?

But it depends on how the system at your Uni works. If you ask to do your exam later, say at resit time (but your exam would be a first sitting), then you may not graduate with your friends. If you sit the exam but have a medical note saying you’re stressed/whatever, the examiners have to take that into account; that would kick-in primarily if you end up on the border – but it depends how your degree is graded.

I know it’s likely to be ADHD that’s the route of the problem, but it’s unlikely that you’ll be diagnosed in a couple of days and if it is causing you huge stress you need to get a medical note to cover that exam. Just level with the doctor and have a meltdown if necessary. Don’t leave it until the last minute – you’d be amazed at how busy GPs are with troubled students at exam time. The Uni may not like dealing with something retrospectively either.

Even if you get a diagnosis for ADHD tomorrow, you still need time to prepare for the exam and it’s likely that all that will happen is the Uni will give you extra time during the exam – if they act quickly enough. It might be too late to put that in place.. and would it help?

But if you think you can do it then start trying to calm your mind now – have long hot baths and gently get your head into the frame of mind you need to be in. Exercise too will get rid of pent-up energy.

Ask someone at Uni what your opptions are. Understand how the system works and get help. Most of all, don’t assume that the rules in my Uni are the same as the ones in yours. Talk to your tutor.

Good luck!

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[Scattybird]

Joca90 – as a follow up to Tiddler’s post – if this is not your last exam and you have a while to go yet, then going into suspense until you sort out the ADHD might be an option. But even then you will need medical evidence.

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[Joca90]

shutterbug55,

I`m not sure if I am so passionate about it anymore… But still, not gonna give it up, not just yet..

Well if I ever become an architect, I would be glad to project house for you, not sure how long it will take, but I will!

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[Joca90]

Tiddler,

Well, I guess I could freeze the year, and than try again next year.. I just hope things will be better than, as you said.. I talked with a real good friend, she said that it would only make me more frustrated.. Still I fill like I really need a good rest. It worries me just that life is going by, and all I am doing is losing time and crying over spilt milk… Really need to go to a doctor, seriously..

thanks a lot for respond!

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[Joca90]

Hello Scattybird,

First thing to do tomorrow, to go to a doctor. I will try my best to finish this work… I guess I could ask for help from some friends, but it is tough because i think they already hate me for what I am doing to myself.. Still if I fail, I guess it is not a big deal if I lose a year, after all.. Than I would find time to learn how to deal with this mess of life…

Thanks a lot Scattybird, all best..

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[kc5jck]

Before you go to the doctor, write down why you think you have ADHD, the problems/symptoms you are having, how long this has been affecting you, what you would like to see happen immediately, and any other relevant information you can think of.

If your like the rest of us, when you get to the doc your mind will be out to lunch. Notes will help.

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[Joca90]

kc5jck

Yes, for sure I will!

Thanks!

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[JimC.]

@Joca90: You’re not studying now so you might as well get diagnosed and work on an ADD solution>>> if in fact that’s what’s happening. At the same time, as Scattybird says, seek help and advice from your school and profs. They will help.

If there’s energy left, pick a part of your studies you like best and work away as best you can just doing light reading or studying. Ignore the rest, just try to do a little.

If you work away at these 2-3 things, then you will make progress. And you will feel MUCH better for it.

Been there, done that…but with business statistics and accounting. If your architecture looks great, it’s because you do have a wonderful sense of what can be; you may lack a few motivational things in terms of execution of the details. With better understanding of your strengths and weaknesses, you can then fine-tune your direction into the part of architecture that you are really good at, and avoid the cr@p you don’t like.

Good luck, and please keep us posted. Jim

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