The Forums › Forums › Emotional Journey › Self Medicating/Risk Taking › How did/do you self medicate?
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May 5, 2011 at 3:10 pm #89539
AnonymousInactiveMay 5, 2011 at 3:10 pmPost count: 14413Previously at different times in my life:
Ephedrine
Cocaine
Crystal meth
Ecstasy
Cigarettes
Caffeine pills
Lots and lots of coca cola
(Um yeah bad case of this works for me but no idea I was trying to fix an unknown problem at the time)
Now since being diagnosed with adhd:
Ritilan is managing most of it (this is not self medicating but thought I would add it anyways)
Having a hard time letting go of the nicotine and caffeine tho!
REPORT ABUSEMay 5, 2011 at 3:10 pm #103709
AnonymousInactiveMay 5, 2011 at 3:10 pmPost count: 14413May 5, 2011 at 8:33 pm #103710Pad- for years I smoked pot. Now that I’m on Ritalin, I have no need to smoke anymore. It was mostly to hide from the world and now I don’t feel I have to hide.
REPORT ABUSEMay 5, 2011 at 9:56 pm #103711
AnonymousInactiveMay 5, 2011 at 9:56 pmPost count: 14413I’ve been very tempted to do a number of drugs, but I figured out very young that I was easily addicted to things, so I never started.
Now, books, internet, and food are another story…I can’t stop any of those.
REPORT ABUSEJune 25, 2011 at 8:18 pm #103712
AnonymousInactiveJune 25, 2011 at 8:18 pmPost count: 14413I’ve tried almost every drug on the planet at one time or another, but I quickly realized I had no interest in most of them. My addictions of choice have settled on Alcohol, Food, knowledge and Adrenaline. If I keep my brain stimulated with projects at work, books and documentaries at home or anything else that keeps the wheels turning at a rapid pace, I’m good to go. If I become bored or end up doing some monotonous, repetitive task, I quickly devolve and turn to one of my other addictions.
A boring day at work will usually end with me heading to the bar. Boring weekend is beers in the pool with the neighbors. Food is a more accessible and constant addiction that I have battled my whole life and is present in every hour of the day, lurking in the shadows. I have found a slightly more healthy, although more dangerous, outlet in my sportbike.
A few years ago I purchased a Kawasaki ZX10R, a light weight race bike that does 104mph in first gear and wheelies under power. I had ridden for years and this for me was a return to my roots. I was instantly hooked and I began riding progressively faster and more aggressively. I soon found myself crossing the lonely Arizona desert at speeds reaching 180mph, then up through the high country doing 90mph through twisting corners. This is just what my brain needed! Finally I was doing something that was moving as fast as my mind and it felt like home.
But like everything else, eventually I lost the “charge” I got out of riding, although I still love it, It just doesn’t seem to be exciting for me like it once was. Like a heroin addict who needs more and more of the drug to get high, I now feel this way about speed and danger. It seems no matter what I pursue in life, that addiction constantly grows until I can find a new one.
I think lyrics from a Tool song sum it up for me…
Something has to change.
Un-deniable dilemma.
Boredom’s not a burden
Anyone should bear.
Constant over stimu-lation numbs me
but I would not want
You any other way.
Cause,
It’s not enough.
I need more.
Nothing seems to satisfy.
I said,
I don’t want it.
I just need it.
To breathe, to feel, to know I’m alive.
REPORT ABUSEJuly 27, 2011 at 8:30 am #103713
AnonymousInactiveJuly 27, 2011 at 8:30 amPost count: 14413Caffeine, nicotine, and sweets.
REPORT ABUSEJuly 27, 2011 at 8:31 am #103714
AnonymousInactiveJuly 27, 2011 at 8:31 amPost count: 14413July 27, 2011 at 12:21 pm #103715soda/pop, coffee (the hard stuff with caffeine) food (sweet, etc.) and anything with FLAVOR, and action movies – it’s got to be non-stop action, no slow or boring moments. I’ve seen the latest Star Trek movie at least 8 times, and Terminator 3 probably a dozen times – they help me relax so I consider them a drug.
REPORT ABUSEJuly 27, 2011 at 12:28 pm #103716Caffeine mostly, but it was only effective for a limited time. It was like turning on a countdown clock and everything had to be done before it hit zero and I went flat. I couldn’t repeat it though as I get jitters from even normal amounts of the stuff.
I overeat too, but it is not a way of self medicating, just a way of keeping myself busy or interested. Food doesn’t help me concentrate unless I am undernourished, having forgotten to eat.
REPORT ABUSEJuly 30, 2011 at 3:54 pm #103717Tool is a GREAT band!
Past self meds – Food, alcohol, sex/affairs, drugs, internet
Current – Internet, video games.
When not on meds – Sleep and alcohol
Food was my way of dealing with that constant itch too. Cant stand being bored! Gosh why couldnt I get addicted to something like yard work? Or housework? Or exercise? hahahahaha I dont know if you would call them addictions though… More like phases. Food was always there. Became a teen, got drunk all the time. Got a boyfriend, had sex all the time. Got pregnant, got into cybersex/porn, which then lead into affairs. That was a huge mess. Got out of that… Got into drugs. Not hard core. Just wanted to try everything and anything that came my way. Though I made up my mind a long time ago I would never do cocaine, heroin, meth, crack. Did a bunch of other drugs though. Stopped that. Was sucked into World of Warcraft… Done that… Now back to good ol’internet and video games!
I should really get a hobby. Maybe now on meds I can stick to it and finish things! hahahaha
REPORT ABUSEJuly 30, 2011 at 4:17 pm #103718Chocolate loads of it. Yum! I once got two bags of chocolate and in a day ate them all. It was dove chocolate and the warpers had sayings.
Knitting does that count.
food more the carbs the better.
Cherry, orange crush. Not since college though, which was last year.
Writing (have at least three manuscripts in the workings. One of the manuscripts I have revised 3 times and working to have it publish someday)
REPORT ABUSESeptember 4, 2011 at 5:56 am #103719Wierd – i have alwayshad these moments when I am zoning out and binge on food. Its like never feeling full, continuing to eat and in a daze. Alternatively, I also have periods of starvation where only coffee feels right. Could this be yet another crappy thing about myself that I have always known be ADHD??
BTW, lovereading everyones posts. So cool to hear that there are others like me. And yes, now I have that AWESOME Tool song stuck in my head
REPORT ABUSESeptember 4, 2011 at 8:04 am #103720Food.
When I was a teenager and in my 20s, I used to buy ‘glucose tablets’ to keep me going. For the last 20 years or so, I’ve done what you say, Lucky – zoned out on food. I do this at night mostly – eating till I feel the post prandial dip which helps me finally get off to sleep, which I have always struggled with.
I’m hoping that medication will help sort this out for me…
REPORT ABUSESeptember 4, 2011 at 7:04 pm #103721
AnonymousInactiveSeptember 4, 2011 at 7:04 pmPost count: 14413Carbs. And it’s worse in the winter. I am like a bottemless pit. And I use carbs to put me to sleep even when I wake up in the middle of the night, because nothing else works. I’m dreading this winter because all carbs do is slow my head and that’s not what I want during the day. Isn’t caffeine supposed to be bad for ADD because it cuts down on oxygen to the brain? Or is it okay? I hate looking like everyone else on the outside when on the inside I’m working like crazy to try to keep up. This website is such a life-saver.
REPORT ABUSESeptember 8, 2011 at 5:05 pm #103722Carbs and coffee.
And chocolate, nicest combo of both.
Instant energy, and necessary to stay awake.
Detoxed from coffee during burn-out, which gave me a chance to sleep until I wasn’t tired anymore,
Recently switched to paleo/primal diet and eat very little carbs, because I came from 95% carbs.
This gives me a more even energy, and no hungerpains-light headedness when hungry.
My stomach isn’t bloated anymore and I am losing weight. All good!
And imminent deadlines – the adrenaline rush made me focus.
Doesn’t work long term though, the burn-out from longterm stress was a result.
Oh and alcohol, but that was maybe more to justify the unproductiveness while being hungover.
I was trying to write my thesis for BSc.
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