To Err Is Human, To Dwell On It Is ADD

[Anonymous]

To the outside onlooker, ADDers often look like textbook cases for manic depression. We are so good at bringing ourselves down. I can have a phenomenal day and not know why and minutes later I’ve ripped myself a new one for some trivial or, most times, fabricated reason. This will undoubtedly stick with me for the rest of my Life but letting the moron that commandeers my brain from time to time speed off in a bad direction is not an option. He’d have me wrapped around a proverbial tree by the end of the month. So to counter act this tendency toward making mountains out of mole hills and only believing the bad, I’ve found that a drive in the car with the radio cranked and the windows down (if weather allows) is the best pick me up; second only to that sound girls make when you tell them something sad, and they want to comfort you, you know that “Aawww” sound. God, I love that……..but anyhoo. One of the best songs is Take It Easy by The Eagles (it had to be written by a like minded individual). The lyrics make me remember that Life happens and there ain’t a thing we can do about it. I won’t post them here, since most people know the song, but if you don’t, read them over.

BTW, most of my tips and coping mechanisms revolve around Music. Hell, my whole Life does. I think everyone needs that one thing that they think about first thing in the morning and go to bed with at night. Music has so many facets and nuances that I’ll never run out, which keeps it novel so I don’t have to reinvent the wheel every time my attention for some aspect of it grow thin. Plus, chicks dig rock stars

-Max

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[Saffron]

Dude, I hear you. It’s comforting to know there are other people out there who spend as much energy as I do trying to outrun torturous thoughts. When I first heard the storyline of the film “Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind,” I thought the premise was absolutely made for me. I’d give anything to undergo selective memory erasure.

Another awesome song for car-driving away blues is “Drift away” by Dobie Gray. (Remember that one?) Equivalent for us women to the “Aawww…” sound you guys like is being wrapped in that warm and protective big-brotherly kind of bear hug, the one that isn’t done because the guy was trying to get some action but because he just wanted to love you up and be all supportive. (Makes women melt. Get it right and the action will usually come to you next time.)

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[Anonymous]

To continue in the direction of songs that really resonate with me and possibly others whose brains are hot-wired like mine, I’ll periodically post the song(s) that have really inspired me or threw some light on an unexamined idea or belief. Anyone reading this should also feel free to contribute a song or two that has helped them cope or has uplifted them or has just gotten them through a rough patch. I think this could be really beneficial, because as we all know sometimes an idea must be beaten into our thick skulls in every way imaginable before we fully absorb it. Sometimes a song comes along and gets you where you belong.

The song that first comes to mind is “Staple It Together” by Jack Johnson

If you don’t know the song then read these lyrics and see if this sparks you.

Its really

Too bad

He became a prisoner of his own past

He stabbed the moment in the back

With the round thumbtack

That held up the list of things he gotta do

Its really,

No good

He’s moving on before he understood

He shot the future in the foot with every step he took

From the places that he’s been cause he forgot to look

Better staple it together and call it bad weather

Staple it together and call it bad weather

Mm hmm

Well I guess you could say

That he don’t even know where to begin

Cause he looked both ways but he was so afraid

Digging deep into the ditch

With every chance he missed

And the mess he made

Cause hate is such a strong word

And every brick he laid

A mistake they say

That his walls are getting taller

His world is getting smaller

Better staple it together and call it bad weather

Staple it together and call it bad weather

Mm hmm

-Max

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[Anonymous]

OK – so I am NOT the only one who can delve into deep suicidal depression for absolutely no reason? That is good to know. I will learn to be easier on myself. The thing that works for me in relieving the depression is to focus on anything nature related. Sitting outside and watching the birds, going for a hike with my dog, even just walking out my door and smelling the fresh air. Yep, it’s actually as simple as that. Don’t get me wrong, I love my music too, but I’m more of a classical music person. I also like new agey kind of stuff too – anything without words. It’s too hard for me to concentrate on the words and try to listen to the music too. Maybe that will improve when I get on a drug therapy. Liner notes help — and I must admit, there are some phenomenal lyrics out there! Oh, and BTW, I am gonna use that awww thing….LOL!

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[Anonymous]

I m pretty good at morbid self reflection. It’s mostly about my job. I have spent too much time covering my ass and wondering when the next shoe will drop. I’m trying to live this life day by day…sometimes minute my minute. I’m using organizational tools now and taking medication for the first time since I was about 11. These days, I try to live by one of the acronyms one of my old drill sergeants in the army used to say when things went to crap around him…FIDO…”F-it, Drive ON!

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[Anonymous]

Learning to go easy on yourself is not as easy as it sounds. My family tells me all the time that i am a creative andd talanted person. I do alot of crafting: Tatting, Knit, Crocheting, Photography and many other things. I make these (as my family and friends say) talanted person. The only problem is that I dont see it all i see is the flaws and mistakes. My mother tries to get me to understand how creative i really am. I will show them the new thing iI have created and they are Jaw droping in love with it and i am like really are you sure. they are like are you kidding its amazing. So Learning to go easy on yourself is hard for me, I just hope that you have an easier time than I have had in the last 25 years since i was diaganosed with ADD. I am still very critical and dont see the good i do or the abilities i have.

Good Luck

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[Anonymous]

I have two ways I cheer myself up: for one, I have a whole section in my YouTube account dedicated to comedy…everything from laughing babies to tv bloopers to goofballs doing boneheaded things around someone with a camera The other one is also music… putting on “feel good” stuff. For me, oldies work a lot, and some good old 80’s rock too.

Steve Winwood’s “Roll With It Baby” could not sum up my ADD life any better

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[Anonymous]

i can cheer myself up by spendiing time with my sister she always comes to the rescue. If she is busy i get a hug and then i listed to music and wtch tv. I also tat, crochet and knit and many other crafts. that way my hands are busy and i can concentrate on what i really need to remember sometimes, or apble to sit a liittle stiller and not be needing to move as much.

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[Anonymous]

I err and dwell… really it’s my daily routine lol! To stop dwelling I listen to music too. I got myself a MP3 player recently and, when I feel bad coming home from the office, I like to listen to REM Out of time. It’s not as much the lyrics, the tone of the music gets to me. The worst I feel, the louder I play it. Up to a certain volume mind you, I don’t want to be death! Life is hard enough as is without ADDing a new difficulty to it! When at home, I play on my DS. That usually totally takes me away from any worry.

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[Anonymous]

LOL!!! Mistake or subconscious message? I meant deaf not death!

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[Anonymous]

Me again. I was afraid my last post might upset people. Don’t worry folks, I’m not suicidal! Geez, I wouldn’t wanna miss the new 3DS next spring!! I can’t wait to play Paper Mario 3D. Again I err and dwell. Perfect example.

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[Anonymous]

I like “Mr. Brightside” by The Killers….not sure if it’s a pick me up, or just a song that seems to describe how I think.

I’m a writer and I find that I’m too drawn to drama…mine or anybody else’s….I used to think that when I got on a poisonous path of thought I should just let myself play it out, because there’s nothing I can do to tear myself away.

Now I’m starting to wonder about that..I think I should start employing more of these tactics- I LOVE music, poetry, crafts, but I hang out with a lot of people that kind of ignore that stuff or make fun of me for it, so I’ve downplayed it a lot over the years.

And Max: Girls really DO dig rock stars!

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[Anonymous]

ps- “Anthem” by Leonard Cohen is also very apt:

“Ring the bells that still can ring

Forget your perfect offering

There is a crack in everything

That’s how the light gets in. “

(Always gets me teared up)

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[Anonymous]

I have a hard time watching hostage or rape related movies or cop shows. I hate the helplessness I see of the victims. It puts me back in my childhood when I felt helpless at the hands of bullies. I was watching criminal minds and law and order and had to keep changing the channel because of the horror of it all. I only tuned into the end when they get the sadistic prick. I would watch movies like death Wish and other vigilante and cop stuff because I loved it when the little guy got back at all the bad guys. It was so cathartic. Makes me feel like I’m the one getting back at all the people that abused me. Of course I would never do that because I was always afraid of jail and what would happen to me there, and of course I was raised Catholic so that fear of hell always hung over me. I am currently undergoing treatment known as TIR. IT stands for Traumatic Incident Reduction. Also knwon as flooding it basically entails the shrink getting me to recount what happened and asking me how I felt about it over and over again. He said that the whole technique is so that the incident can move from the part of the brain that considers it immediate and traumatic to the part of the brain that considers it not too terribly important. I’ve had some success with it and intend to continue. Anyone here may want to ask your counselors about it.

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[gforcewarp9]

Megatron,

Ive read your posts in a few different places and I gotta say, I think you need new freinds! Youve said that they are wierded out by you talking about a.d.d and the process you are going through, and now you are saying that they make fun of you for being crafty (o.k, my keyboard is doing something wierd, and wont let me type a question mark, so just pretend its there because I can`t figure it out!)

I am a crafty person, among many other things, but my freinds think its cool! I make recycled fashions and my girlfriends are practically banging down my door for my stuff. Didnt your freinds get the memo that crafting is hip (question mark!)

Please, ditch these people! You seem like a really nice girl with a lot of creative ability, not to mention, youve managed to put yourself through school and find a cool job. Those are things I have never been able to do, despite how much Ive really wanted to earn a degree. I could never keep a crappy job long enough to afford school, and since I have defaulted on a student loan long ago, I couldnt get anymore pell grants unless I could start paying it steadily, and I couldnt do that because I couldnt keep a job....etc. etc. etc. Giant and tragic catch 22. And thats all beside the other issue just trying to be a good student with a.d.d. (which at times I could be a damn fine student)

Now back to you: I told you that story because you should be so damn proud of yourself! O.K you beat yourself up doing it, but you did it. Ditch these people in your life who dont appreciate you and how hard youve worked for everything; they are draging your self-esteem down.

With love from a complete stranger.

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[Author]

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