Two weird things my brain does…

[ashockley55]

1) Phrases and/or songs get stuck in my head in a maddening loop. Not the entire song, or even an entire part of a song, just a very short phrase from the song that repeats over and over and over. Or, my own phrase that I repeat or even sing over and over to myself in my head. For example, this morning, “Let’s put on our underwear.” That is an innocuous, and hilarious, example (I mean, why am I referring to myself as a multiple, for one thing – am I Her Majesty?), but they can also be more malicious in the vein of negative self-talk.

2) I have an over-active imagination that scares the bejeebus out of me and has led psychiatrists to suspect that I am suffering from psychosis. (Fit along well with the whole bipolar diagnosis I had.) It nearly completely cripples me. I am of no use to myself or others after dark (which, in this season, is just after 5pm). My imagination cranks up and I am scared to go anywhere or do anything. I’m afraid of the dark. I imagine ghosts or evil spirits. It’s like my brain has absorbed every horror movie commercial (because I don’t actually go see horror movies, I’m not that much of a masochist) and throws those scary things back up to me. What if it’s right there at the edge of my bed? What if it’s sitting there waiting to get me? I imagine it and freak myself out! No, I’m not really seeing it. No, I don’t really believe it’s there, there. But my imagination gets to me and I freak out just the same.

Anybody else on either of these? I’m hoping? Please don’t let me be alone!

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[Anonymous]

I have experienced #1 at times. Will get stuck on usually some music phrase or part of a song.

it is usually has happened when i am in a good mood.

Are you having #2 when you are awake or asleep? I have had vivid dreams that have been very scary

That has happened in the past with some medication and then I was taken off it.

Most recently(Nov 11) since being treated for ADD. My dreams i can remember now and they have been pretty

strange The good thing though is that I am getting better sleep

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[ashockley55]

Thanks for your response and question, Robert! I very rarely remember my dreams. I’m getting scared when I’m wide awake! Again, I should stress that I don’t actually see anything, I just freak myself out imagining that they could be there. It’s the same as imagining there could be an attacker hiding behind a darkened corner (which, I do that also, and, actually, I think having an imagination like that can sometimes keep a woman safe, it’s better than being unaware and oblivious) but I seem not to have matured beyond childhood fears of ghosts and monsters in the closet.

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[Anonymous]

Are you confident n the psych’s you are seeing.

I had to go from a community psych to a specialized ADD/ADHD clinic that looks

at the whole spectrum including depression, etc.

Community psych was not too keen to treat Adult ADD/ADHD so i said NEXT

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[ashockley55]

I have an appt. Feb. 13th. I haven’t seen a psychiatrist in over a year, when I had a change in insurance and my psychiatrist dropped me like a stone! They didn’t even work with me to titrate off my meds. I had to go through withdrawal from a mood stabilizer and an anti-psychotic on my own. Since then, I haven’t been on any meds, and I’ve been relatively okay, which has been a revelation for me, and had me wondering, “So, what IS wrong with me?” I know there’s something, but it’s clearly (to me, and to many around me) not bipolar disorder. I’m able to survive, but not thrive. I want to thrive.

Anyway, I’ve seen a number of psychiatrists of varying levels of attentiveness to my needs, and the diagnosis has ranged/evolved from depression to bipolar disorder, to, at one point, from one psychiatrist, after one visit, borderline personality disorder!

I’m currently on a privatized Medicare plan, and have only two options to chose from for a psychiatrist. I’m hoping the one I picked works out!

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[Tiddler]

I get no 1 all the time.

Not just songs but ideas or thoughts that get stuck in my head. One random ‘nothing’ phrase has been popping up in my head daily for about 25 years. I can’t get rid of it. It’s just nonsense, doesn’t have any significance and interferes with other stuff I’m trying to concentrate on. The others are just random and they go away after a little while.

I haven’t had the second one but I do have an overactive imagination.

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[Anonymous]

ashockley

Before you talk to your psych I suggest having some prepared questions.

Also take some time to outline what you are experiencing

Your diagnoses that the psychiatrists over time have provided are all over the map.

The new one should prepared to listen to you and they need

to look at your symptoms in totality

I started with anxiety disorder over 25 years ago, That changed to bipolar

I went to a psych 7 years ago and found out I had sleep apnea and he treated me for

depression

Finally in Nov last year the Adult ADD. The doctor is continuing to have me

take antidepressants and at some point will try to take me off them gradually.

It may very well be that the ADD meds will be enough.

Good luck with your appt.

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[Anonymous]

1#….absolutely! I drive myself mad sometimes – I almost always have a part of a song stuck on replay in my head, but sometimes I’ll repeat a phrase that I’ve said to myself earlier on. It happens a lot when I’m trying to run around and do things.

I talk back to the “practical” person in my head sometimes. Well, not out loud. I’ll have an argument with it. It seems crazy, but I’m sure I’m not loopy haha.

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[kc5jck]

1# is quite common and is otherwise known as Oppositional Defiant Disorder or ODD by those in the know and is often comorbid with ADHD. You want to get on with you life, and your brain rattles off a repetitive bunch of nonsense for hours at a time. Your brain opposes and defies your efforts to function normally. This condition can get so bad in some that the brain will pack up and leave during the middle of the night.

Some who have had this happen will wake up, and not knowing that their brain has vacated the premisis and is off sleeping under a bridge somewhere, go off to work as usual. I am sure you have run across some of these unfortunate brainless souls at times throughout your day. They are as empty and devoid of thoughts as someone without ADHD.

When #1 starts to happen, you may try either of two things:

1. You can wrap “duck” tape around your head, being careful to tightly cover the ears to prevent your brain from excaping until it again becomes compliant OR

2. You can attempt to subdue the unruly beast with frozen margaritas. You may have heard of this as being referred to as “brain freeze.” If you try this method, please report back to the site members at: http://totallyadd.com/forum/topic.php?id=2144

I am not familiar with #2. Since I don’t have an overactive imagination, I don’t think I can help you there. Sweet dreams, Ashockley55.

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[Anonymous]

okay 1st when berry said ” song stuck on replay in my head” i automatically thought of the song..”shorty like a melody in my head it be ringing like na na na na everyday like my ipods stuck on replay”

okay back to the question..

#1 all the time…. just simply saying “lets go” can be stuck in my head and then ill start saying it out loud and without realizing till minutes later..im saying “lets go” in different tunes, accents, ect.

I MOST DEFIINITLY HAVE AN OVER-ACTIVE IMAGINATION!!!! its a gift and curse. Gift because hardly anyone else would have every thought of something I did with such detail ect. Curse cuz ..for example when i was little my mom would be driving the car and out of no where I could just imagine a horrific car crash that my mother and I could have gotten in to and my imagination can imagine the pain, how it looked (outside view, inside view, iternally, ect.) if this would have happened and so forth.

I really dont get the bad imaginations like i used to when i was smaller, I always get the wierd funny ones everyday, I can never get bored with the things i imagine and so thats one of my traits that my friends like about me. My weird, crazy imagination that’ll make you laugh.

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[Anonymous]

ashockley55

I think in reading your post again that you really should get the psych to do a really good assessment.

As I mentioned come prepared and be a clear as you can in communicating with the doctor.

The doctor should be aware how long you have been off meds and how you feel and how functional

you are now, That will give the doctor a little more insight into what direction to go next and drug you

mayor may not respond to.

You shouldn’t have had to deal with withdrawing off meds on your own.

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[Anonymous]

I wasn’t aware that ODD caused these symptoms; I just thought it caused a person to feel defiant. I would have thought the repetitive thoughts were OCD.

I have a horrid imagination, especially at night. I get paranoid about a lot of things, and sometimes I’m sure my paranoia isn’t normal. I’m not sure if this highlights any underlying problem, or I’ve just developed a strong awareness of people in general. But yeah, at night I like to wrap myself into a duvet cocoon and hide away, and I have been doing this since I was little. I hear things at night, and spook myself out a lot. I can’t sleep most of the time, because I fear of silly things. I feel your pain!

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[Anonymous]

Number one is almost every hour of every day!

I do accents also and act out whole conversations like some sort of Monty Python or Derick and Clive episode! If I drive and put music on I find and myself changing the words to the song to make them as silly as can be…. I have even had my daughter saying ” calm down Daddy ” in a sweet way, which makes me laugh bless….. Who’s the child I wonder?

Peter xx

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[ashockley55]

Wow! I’m so glad ya’ll have responded! Seems like repetitive thought really is a thing in the ADD community, and maybe the overactive imagination bit, too.

Robert, thanks so much for your advice. I really am excited but also anxious about the appointment because I feel that it’s up to me to get myself the right diagnosis! That’s a lot of pressure! Who knows what I could be diagnosed with next if I happen to get lost and focus on one aspect over another, or use the wrong words to talk about something! I’m learning that it really is quite subjective. One psychiatrist can hear me talk about my restlessness and go to bipolar disorder, another psychiatrist can hear my talk about my low self-esteem and reactive emotions and go to borderline personality disordeer! I’ve read that verbal communication is difficult for ADDer’s, especially because of the organization issues, that makes sense, and I do have a hard time feeling like I’m getting myself across to people. I know I shouldn’t beat myself up for it, but I do feel responsible for getting the wrong diagnosis to some degree. Maybe I exaggerated my symptoms? Maybe I didn’t tell them about something I should have?

Thanks so much for your comments and shares, ya’ll!

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[kc5jck]

Actually, I would be surprised to find that either of the two weird things necessarily indicate ADD, ODD, OCD, or any other mental condition, although #2 may certainly be more prevalent with anxiety.

As seen in the above posts, there are many in the ADHD community that experience these two things, but I doubt that the relative prevalence is greater than it is outside our community in the realm of the “normal.” Perhaps some of our members who are not ADHD, the spouses, health care professionals, and parents, could help us out on this one. When these weird things occur to a greater extent and become an impairment in your ability to function then it’s a problem.

I get a sense that many of the members have been misdiagnosed with a wide variety of disorders before correctly getting an ADHD diagnosis. Don’t blame yourself on an improper diagnosis. Your ADD will have you talking all over the place and possibly quite excitedly about the symptoms you experience.

I would recommend you make notes to take to your appointments so you don’t forget to mention or ask about things you think about beforehand. This gives you time to work on the wording so that it will make sense. (I should follow my own advice on this one.) You can also rate things as to how important or debilitating they are for you. Have a copy to leave when you go.

There are all kinds on this site, so I don’t think you would be alone in any of your behaviors.

Good luck.

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