[colliequest]

I have, I’ve taken it multiple times actually because I get to questioning some of the stuff I said yes on wasn’t actually that bad and it’s really hard to know, so I kept redoing it. It has said it’s worth pursuing, but it’s confusing still. But I guess that’s why you need a professional, no one can really figure this out by themselves.
My brain is pretty active, and definitely keeps me up at night. I’ll think of something funny and that triggers a bunch of other stuff. It’s entraining, but not very good for winding down for sleep. There’s always at least one song playing, among other things. I know other people get songs stuck in their heads, but I don’t know if it’s constant for them.

My neighbor has told me today she really thinks I have it. I just don’t know and keep thinking of reasons I don’t. Honestly it’s causing me a lot of distress at the moment because my brain keeps hyperfocussing (the best word I can think of to describe it, sorry if I’m misusing it) and scrutinizing every single detail whether I want it to or not. It’s actually making me feel pretty anxious and drained.

• This reply was modified 6 years, 2 months ago by colliequest.

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[colliequest]

I’m also just afraid of being one of those people who comes in to a doctor thinking they have a problem but they really don’t. Some articles I’ve read talk about that and make me anxious about being that person, which makes me overthink and not want to go through with it. That said, I am struggling. And my neighbor is concerned about me. She says she can see me being in the same place I am now in five years, that I’m not able to take care of myself, and I absolutely agree with her.

I’m just not sure if ADHD is the explanation. The stuff about disorganization, having poor time management, resonates with me very very strongly. But I don’t have trouble with conversations (aside from being very shy and not sure how to interact with people), other stuff that I most commonly see others say they can’t focus on no matter what they do, doesn’t seem to be quite the case for me. I struggle mostly with the ability to organize myself enough to accomplish much.

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[colliequest]

My neighbor does think I should go ahead and try to see a doctor and says she’ll help me figure it out. I’m still not sure, but it won’t hurt to check anyways and I do feel better with her in my corner.

I guess I’m just very much doubting it, because most of the people who I’ve seen describe ADHD say they can’t read unless very interested or hyperfocussing, and I read quite a lot as a kid. That said, I love fiction, whether in books or on a screen. I love it a lot. I would spend nearly every moment of my whole life immersed in it if I could.
I can also study, which is another reason I’m just very uncertain. Like for example, two years ago I would lie down and read a bit out of the driver’s ed book every evening and I did pretty well with that. (I just couldn’t find someone who had time to teach me, so it never went beyond that.)

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