[soulmantra]

hard to believe the similarities to my own situation in many ways.

except my wife was completely UNsupportive of even the possibility that ADD was something i was struggling with despite often complaining about me never being able to finish anything and time just disappearing, etc.

i first started learning about ADD / ADHD because i saw my daughter struggling with things around age 4 or 5 that i still struggle with today in my late 30s! i use the term ADD to describe myself mostly because i don’t have the hyperactive component and she is very much the same. i first started reading and watching videos because of a chance sighting of the ADD AND LOVING IT video at my local library after ADD was already on my radar because of another few happy coincidences. that was 3 or 4 years ago… it took me awhile but as i learned more and more i became positive that i had it and started trying to implement strategies long prior to any medication.

JUST KNOWING made a huge difference long before the medication… i started realizing how much of my time and energy were being wasted just treading water and started to make changes in my life and my behavior. of course it wasn’t all smooth sailing and old habits are hard to break but even when i would really fail at something… i could understand why and see where i went wrong and ignored my own best interest because i got carried away.

my wife works full time and i was working part time and taking care of the kids most of the time and just over a year ago (along with many things that have nothing to do with ADD) i came to the conclusion that she needed to leave our home. in a relatively calm and collected manner i made it very clear to her that she would be moving out as soon as possible.
that was january 2017.
she was gone by february 2017.
by march 2017… i was FINALLY able to get in to see a psychiatrist and he immediately started me on concerta.
even though she was gone when i started taking the medication itself… i definitely can relate to your feelings of not really expecting much before and now expecting more of yourself and actually delivering on those expectations.
it feels great!

but sometimes when people slow us down when we’re on a roll… we don’t just derail and get distracted any more because we actually remember we had a purpose… then we get annoyed that somebody or something is in the way of getting that job done. i believe it’s very common.

i have less experience with you on medication but i have tried concerta and vyvanse and ritalin and found concerta to be the best for me so far… but even within concerta the days can vary SOOO MUCH! some days i can tell the dose is too much and i am almost back to being lazy and accomplish nothing because i am almost overstimulated to the point that i’m not stimulated at all (if that makes sense). other days it fires me up just enough to feel almost the same as if i was taking nothing… just buzzing around doing a million things but the difference is that i actually finish things on medication where as i never did without it. then there are the days where i am able to match things perfectly and don’t attempt too much but finish all or almost all of what i need to and feel very satisfied.

when i say the “dose is too much” i really don’t mean it changes… there can be 10 days where i take the same dose (or doses) at the same time of day, etc. and some days it just works and other days it doesn’t. sleep (or lack of), the situations i know are coming, the surprises, all factor in. whether i remember to take my L-tyrosine makes a big difference for me too. some 10 day periods i might only feel like we got it right for 3 or the days… other periods it could be 7 or 8!

with my psychiatrist we have tried customizing things and honestly i am finding some days less is better for getting things done… but more is better for keeping me calmer and less argumentative. kinda weird to write that as i just sort of figured that out while i was typing this and reflecting on the last few months.

i’m talking all concerta here though with some ritalin here and there depending on the day.

vyvanse for me was horrendous… it was alright while it was working but as it started to wear off i was the biggest space cadet ever!
staring into cupboards, lost in thought… and then at nighttime… oh the binge eating festivals!!! after i looked into it a bit i saw it was sometimes used to treat binge eating??? well for me it induced binge eating to the extreme!!! needless to say that one didn’t stay in the medicine cabinet too long.

i wondering if you could try adjusting the dose a little to see if a bit more or a bit less would help with the irritability, etc.?
maybe even just for certain days depending what you had going on?
might be worth asking your psychiatrist.

i have never been happier and having my wife out of the house is the best thing i could have done… the struggles with ADD and single parenting 85% of the time are very real and i am constantly working to get better but at least i don’t have to fight against somebody who wasn’t supportive of me wanting to do better for myself and my family. i have really noticed that waaay too many people are too content to just do things as they always have for no other reason and they get pretty uppity when you challenge that status quo. an example, when i stopped drinking just because it wasn’t helping me in any way and usually made the ADD worse in many ways… SOOOOOOOOOOOO many people just came out of the blue to attack me because they were feeling judged or guilty or deep down they wanted to drink less or something. it was just bizarre… people would seek me out to tell me i was wrong when i have no idea how they even knew because i wasn’t even telling anybody or making a show of it (other than obviously not having a drink in my hand). mostly my wife had a HUGE problem with it and she was telling people and resenting me.

holy novel batman… my medication is wearing / worn off and i’m off in tangentland!!!
sorry about all that… just some things to think about that are kinda sorta related.
i’m certainly not encouraging you to “drop the dead weight” like i did because our situations are radically different in many ways… but just another perspective from somebody on a similar ride.

hope your next few years are even better…
soulmantra

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[soulmantra]

i have found L-tyrosine to be absolutely essential to be able to continue taking concerta.
i found it through dr.daniel amen’s 7 types of ADD / ADHD and decided to give it a try.
i don’t believe it would help everybody but for me it has really helped with headaches when the concerta is wearing off as well as just generally making me feel much more focused than concerta alone.
it is meant help your brain produce more dopamine, which is essential if you want concerta to be able to help you long term.

of course this is all just my subjective opinion but whether it helps mentally or not really doesn’t matter…
i would take it JUST for the almost complete elimination of the headaches i was having when concerta was wearing off.
there will still be days where i just plain forget about the L-tyrosine and then i will be wondering, “what is with the headache???”
of course, go figure, i’m distracted by other stuff and then i realize… i didn’t take it and it all makes sense.

it’s a bit annoying because it’s supposed to be taken between meals on a mostly empty stomach and i always seems to remember right before or right after i eat and then have to try to remember again later (but not too much later!).

i’m about the same age and fairly recently diagnosed as well (about 1 year ago).

best of luck on your journey from here.

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