Rant

I have a Bachelor of Science from the University of Waterloo in Ontario Canada. In 2007 I was named one of their top 50 science graduates of all time. And do you know why this honor was bestowed on me? Because I was Bill on The Red Green Show. My name is on a brass plaque, on a huge boulder on the campus, for getting hit in the head by rocks, bricks, hammers, axes, knives and two by fours. And my family couldn’t be prouder. Believe me, I’ve asked them to try and be prouder, and they couldn’t.

I mention this award for two reasons. First, I’m shallow and insecure and desperate for approval. The second reason is that I know some scientists and while making the documentary ADD and Loving It?!, we spoke with some heavyweight scientific experts. Let me stare off into space as we show some of them.

And it was Dr. Ned Hallowell who told us…

The problem is, scientists believe something is true if they can prove it is. Or more often, if they can’t prove it isn’t. They believe gravity will make this ball fall because past experience and all the current theories suggest it will fall. And voila, more evidence. But the moment there’s a floating ball, or one that rises, well, then they’ll have to change the theories.

So generally, scientists and experts, bless their naïve nerdy little hearts, believe that ordinary people will hear scientific evidence, scientific proof, and go, “Oh, really! No kidding. I always felt it was the other way, but if that’s what the evidence shows, then I’ll have to admit I was wrong and accept that idea.” HA HA HA HA HA!!!! What planet are they from? Get out of the lab and talk to people. You’ll be scared to death! We are superstitious, emotional, morons. We have less common sense than an ostrich, an ostrich who thinks he can defeat a pack of hungry lions, using card tricks! We believe anything! Anything!

Do you know how many people are willing to die for their beliefs? Of course, when people say, “I’m willing to die for my country or my religion or to protect my stash of drugs” what they really mean is, “I’m willing to kill for my country or my religion or to protect my stash of drugs.”

Scientists think people care about facts. People don’t. People don’t believe studies of medical disorders. Even people in Medicine don’t!

That’s right, even the medical experts ‘know!’ Several nurses have told me how they always have many more mental patients admitted during a full moon.

Foolishly, I point out that scores of studies, scores of them, have found absolutely zero increase during full moons. None have ever shown a significant impact. What happens is, some psychotic patients come in and someone says, “It must be a full moon.” And everyone remembers it was a full moon. And if someone checks and discovers it’s not a full moon…

“Well, this is the exception that proves the rule.”

So, my point is… Facts? Statistics? Proof? HA HA HA HA HA! The silicon implants are fake boobs. The real boobs are us! (EXITS & RETURNS) If you’re wondering, ‘What does this have to do with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder?’ you must be new to the subject.

Diagnosing and managing ADD or ADHD is hard enough and It gets worse when the experts believe in non-sense.

For more Rick Green Rants see:

• Does Natural Mean Safe?
• Treatments vs Cures.  What’s the Difference?
• Don’t Label Me ADHD
• The Internet is Amazing.  People are Annoying.