Can a person with ADD/ADHD start a group for ADDers.

[MarieAngell]

Evelyn, it takes practice. I’m certainly not perfect, I get carried away.  I put a lot of thoughts onto the page. Then I try to be Texas Chainsaw Killer ruthless.

Writing succinctly isn’t about distilling a thought into one sentence. It’s about clarity, eliminating the unnecessary, refining the message.   I understand Larynxa suggested giving some space between thought changes, but if there are 5 thoughts, well, there are still 5 thoughts.   Keeping  to 1 or 2 topics is the most readable.

If you want to delve deeper, Google “writing for the web best practices” or  “writing succinctly.”

 

 

 

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[Patte Rosebank]

Various famous writers have been credited with saying that “Writing is about slaughtering your darlings”.  In other words, it’s more about re-writing than about writing.

It gets easier with practise.  I think I need to practise WAY more!

I find it can also help if I separate very different thoughts by adding a line between them.  But I try not to run through too many thoughts in a single post.  Sometimes, I actually succeed!

It’s easier now that we have the EDIT function back, so we can edit as many times as we like for 4 hours.  But you may find it easier to write in Word (less pressure!), then edit & re-edit, and THEN post it here.  And I still come back and edit a few times after that.  (Perfectionism, anyone?)

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[Evelyn]

MarieAngell

I hid in the concession stand during the “Texas Chainsaw Massacre” movie, back in 1975?  I think. It was a double date, and my date sat through a triple feature at the drive-in, alone with the other couple, on Halloween. The other two movies were “Torso” and “SSSSS” about a guy turning into a snake, I never tried to watch that kind of movie again. I’m not a blood and gore person. I guess I haven’t gotten over it.

Quite the Nielsen fan… I don’t know if I am ready to be that “high-brow” in my writing style. Not to say there isn’t any valuable information for me there– there is. It’s going to take a lot of attention to detail, not to mention the fact that “personality” seems to be the first thing they want us to remove.

suc·cinct (sk-sngkt)
adj. suc·cinct·er, suc·cinct·est
1. Characterized by clear, precise expression in few words; concise and terse: a succinct reply; a succinct style.
2. Archaic Encircled as if by a girdle; girded.

To get to succinct, I will need LOTS of practice. It might be a little too rigid for me though. They say practice makes perfect.

But answer this: How do I put the reins on the thoughts I just learned I could express to people who knew where I was coming from?

Although now that I know how you feel it might have already changed the way I present myself. I just didn’t expect you to, expect me to rise to such high ideals as Nielsen. It would be awesome though.

Thank’s for the input.

Evelyn

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[Evelyn]

Larynxa

Larynxa

Much of the help I’ve received from this website has come as a result of adding more to the story. It gets closer to the bone so to speak, and maybe Robb-Eye @Robbo is right, “It may not be all that wise to attempt anything therapeutic on the Internet.”  But this website has been the best therapy I’ve ever had.

Boy I get in trouble easy.

I’m sorry I just ramble on. I’m not sure what to say now. I thought I was a big girl and could handle the gentle guidance of a few peers, about my writing, but I think I was wrong.

My writing is all I have. I am way more sensitive than I thought I would be. I’m not saying the advice is wrong though. You guys are right. I just didn’t expect to be hurt by the advice I asked for.

I hope you guys don’t take this wrong, I love this website, and I value your opinion, and your guidance.

I will try to keep my posts a little less wordy, but please don’t ignore me if I can’t.

Evelyn

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[Patte Rosebank]

@Evelyn, when you’re new here, you often feel like a little bird who’s just learned to fly.  So spread those wings, and try them out!

If you feel like writing long posts, just following wherever your imagination leads you, go for it!  You’re among people who think like that and write like that, so we “get” it.

I think of the suggestions about re-writing, editing, and trying to be succinct as “things to keep in mind”, not “hard & fast rules”.  As long as they’re somewhere in my mind, they eventually give me a little guidance.

But when I’m writing, my main concern is how best to tell the story.  Brevity is the furthest thing from my mind…until I get into the “re-write” stages, and even then, it can be lurking fairly far out on the fringes.

BTW, your latest blog posts are terrific!

 

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[Evelyn]

Larynxa

Thank You, I didn’t really mean to sound like a crybaby. I’m finding all kinds of emotions and sensitivities that I didn’t know I had. I even snapped at my brother this morning.

He lives 14 hours away on a little rural farm in Missouri, I miss him terribly, so when he calls it’s always an occasion. He got on to the subject of jobs, and ignoring my emotions and the depression and just get on with life. Which I have already been doing, just not his way. Usually I can overlook his little jabs at my character. Not this time I let him have it and told him off, reminding him of what I’d been through for the last 10 years.

For the first time in 25 years I got him to back off.

It makes me both sad and pleased at the same time. Sad that I had to tell him off, but pleased that I finally could.

And we still had a 2 hour conversation. I’m the only one who understands him; he has ADHD too. Lucky for him he is stubborn, and he found a very stimulating line of work, and stuck with it. But he has all the other stuff the rest of us have.

Thank you again for understanding.

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[Robbo]

Here’s the best stuff I could muster up @Evelyn–

To share, or not to share “what’s really going on” on the Internet. A whole other can of worms. Not an easy can of worms to open many months ago. Still not an easy can now. It’s a can we cannot ignore though. Right? It’s also more of a can of shame, than a can of worms. Huh?.

Only time will tell if we’re making the right decision to talk about all this stuff here. I’m going for it. And I’m really glad you’ve come along now Evelyn. Along with a really good therapist I’ve got in my life that came back to work just recently. And the foundation of my solution, which is to honestly apply myself to what I’ve been learning from my Bible for many years.

I’ll find some kind of middle ground between talking about some of what’s going on here. And most of it in private with a professional therapist/trained psychologist. And some support groups I’ve been absent from here in my community. Most of all with me, it’s necessary to keep on building a relationship with God, and Jesus Christ. I’ve got to give this 100% of my attention, interest, and love. There’s always more room for improvement. There always will be.

I’ll be able to do a much better job of helping out in this community when I balance out every other area of my life. (not that it’s possible to do…)  it’s a goal. This is what I’ve been trying all along. It just takes a very long time for many of us. Painfully long…

The most important thing for me to remember is that balance is a goal. It’s not necessarily something I’m going to be able to hold on to.

If you keep on asking me these good questions. It’s likely I’ll keep giving you fairly decent answers. So thanks a bunch gal. And please know that I’m being sincere.

I may not be able to keep up with the new and really good n fast pace we’ve got going on here. But you can be sure I’m gonna give it my best shot. 🙂

Peace

R-

PS I sure am glad we’ve got that edit function back!, too bad real life doesn’t have one, huh?.

 

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[Patte Rosebank]

@Evelyn, that’s a really big development for you.  Maybe even a “breakthrough”.  Wow!

Imagine that!  You and your brother can disagree with each other, even snap at each other, but you’re still each other’s best friend.  Like me and my brother.

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[Evelyn]

Larynxa,

It is a big deal, my brother and I share a solid bond, because we seem to think the same way and we enjoy pondering the same subjects.

I’m hoping I can continue building my self-confidence. I don’t want to snap at everybody, for every little thing, but I do like having the ability to stand up for myself when it’s necessary.

My sisters are quick minded; adept at standing up to people, and making it a lesson.

They have no idea how many times I’ve hung up the phone barely able to hold it in my hand.  They have a way of getting to the quick with the skill of a surgeon.

When they do find I have a weakness; like my brain shutting down in a confrontation, they use it to gain the advantage. I try to keep them from seeing them, but I think they’re psychic or something.

I’m just going to keep climbing a step at a time, (an escalator would be nice though)

The friendships I’ve formed here at “totally ADD”, has helped me feel comfortable with my sense of place in the world.

I can come here in pieces, and you guys understand.

Thank you.

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[Evelyn]

MarieAngell,

Thank you for your honest and sincere, advice on my writing style.

I was getting carried away. Which really was unusual for me. I was always afraid to let people know everything I was thinking. I didn’t have that fear in this forum.

I feel safe.

Please, just know the advice you gave is valuable to me and I am using it the best I can. I will get better.

Thank you.

PS: Nielsen is interesting, I can see why you are a fan. I did come across something a little funny though from the BBC on Nielsen.
Thursday, July 3 12:01 AM EDT
Jakob Nielsen Declares the Letter “C” Unusable
By Uncle Sharky

http://www.bbspot.com/News/2003/07/letter_c.html

It’s really cute.

Again, Thank you.

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[Evelyn]

Robbo,

Sharing has risks, there’s no denying that. But it also has benefits. I find both to be true no matter where I am. And sometimes I do choose “not” to open that particular can of worms. I have embarrassed myself around others, usually by sticking my foot in my mouth.

I know I’ve made the right decision by talking in this forum. I love my friends and family but God bless ‘em, they don’t know what to do,with or about me.

I live in the states and our mental health system is severely lacking in all departments, but especially Adult ADD. I’m working to change that, at least in a small way, by starting a support group in my community.

I think it is going to be a welcome addition around here. It is really scary though. I am hoping my momentum holds ‘til the members can help push it forward. I think once they get a taste of the deep sense of finally fitting in somewhere, they will look forward to the meetings.

I do understand your caution though. A life of not measuring up to expected social values, and getting called on it, can put a person in a dark place real quick. I’ve been on the outside looking in a really long time, it’s nice to come in out of the cold and warm up here.

Hearing what you have to say is very therapeutic; it helps me put some of the things I think about in a different perspective. I sorta get a new take on some long standing behaviors/habits I’ve had trouble with.

Sounds to me like you are making some real progress. That’s a good thing.

Keeping everything in balance is one of my most difficult battles. It’s like walking a tightrope all through life; nice that we have a safety net here.

If you find the pace a little on the quick side, just whistle, I think we can wait a minute for you, fill you in on the good stuff, or help you catch-up.

I’m glad you’re here too!

Well you wanted to see my website… don’t expect much, it’s just the blog so far: http://www.evvie01.com/blog

Evelyn

PS: and yes on the edit button!!!!

 

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