Im about to get fired..again..any suggestions

[Anonymous]

First Id like to say how grateful I am too have found this site, it’s such a relief to know I’m not alone. Also finding out at 31 that Ive got ADHD and that I can stop driving myself crazy trying to be like everyone else was also quite the relief.

I found out about the ADHD after I was hired and Ive been really trying to “measure up” at work. My boss wrote me up for time management because he says everyone else can manage the work load except me. In my environment I’m expected to manage as many as 15 projects that have the same deadlines and then my boss throws last minute rush projects at me here and there, Ive worked until 3 am before to get things done. To top it off if I make a mistake he freaks and thinks I don’t know enough, I need a course.

I haven’t told him about my ADHD yet but it’s coming. This week it got really bad with a last minute project dropped on my desk Tuesday, it was too much and since I also suffer from Anxiety and depression I was completely overwhelmed and had to take a few days off to get clear on what I was going to do next.

I’m going to tell him on Tuesday when I go back what I’m dealing with and what I’ll need to be successful. I figure I haven’t got anything to lose, I’m going to get fired if I tell him or not! I will understand if he lets me go because I’m not suited to the position. I’d like to add that I’m good at my actual work, I just cant handle the environment and I cant do that many things at the same time.

My problem is I’m not sure what environment would be good for me? Can anyone share any experience or suggestions?

Thanks!

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[Ivriniel]

Are you in Ontario?

I can’t speak about other provinces (though I imagine they have something similar) but Ontario employers have a duty to accommodate people with disabilities in the workplace. Legally, your boss can’t fire you just because you tell him you have ADHD.

http://www.ohrc.on.ca/en/issues/disability

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[Anonymous]

I’m in Alberta

There is similar Human Rights Legislation, but a provision that state’s an Employer does not have the duty to accommodate if the “Bona fide occupational requirement”s are not being met, or if the accommodation causes the employer undue hardship.

I would require a lighter workload and more time to complete my projects. The last minute rush projects would have to go to someone else. Would this be considered a reasonable accommodation?

I’m not really sure what is a reasonable accommodation to ask for?

Thanks for your input!

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[Patte Rosebank]

Some provinces seem to recognize ADHD as a disability, while others don’t, so I’d put more emphasis on your Depression and Anxiety than on your ADHD, since every province seems to recognize them as disabilities.

You should be raising these issues with your Human Resources department, before you raise them with your boss. Go in with a letter from your doctor, confirming your conditions (Depression, Anxiety, and Adult ADHD), explaining the symptoms and their impact on your ability to function at work, and recommended accommodations to help you function better.

You must do this ASAP!

In most jurisdictions, the employer should be made aware of your condition, if it is going to affect your work. If the employer then refuses to make accommodations (provided the accommodations would not cause undue hardship in the workplace), and continues to punish you for your inability to function properly, you can file a Human Rights complaint against both the company as a whole and any of its employees whom you believe to be discriminating against you. In your case, that would definitely be your boss.

This is the course that I had to take, about 12 years ago. My case dragged on for 3 years, but at the end of it, my former employer settled for ten times their original offer when I was fired for performance issues directly related to the Depression & Anxiety that I had told my employer about, when I was first diagnosed. Despite having my doctor’s letter in my HR file, my new boss (unlke my previous boss) seemed to go out of his way to treat me like a slacker and a moron, instead of someone with a legitimate medical condition.

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[Anonymous]

Wow, I cant thank you enough for sharing that with me.

Ive been feeling really stuck. My company doesn’t have an HR department so I don’t know who else to talk to but my boss and I have no trust that he will keep it confidential which is part of my hesitation of even telling him.

It almost seems easier to just let him fire me…

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[ADDled]

I think what Larynxa is saying (and correct me if I misunderstood Larynxa) is if you disclose to your boss, it makes it more difficult for him to can you. Once you disclose, in Ontario at any rate, he has a duty to accommodate you. According to the Ontario Human Rights Commission’s Policy and Guidelines on Disability and the Duty to Accommodate”, Section3.3.1 – Essential Duties and the Current Job “No one can be judged incapable of performing those duties until efforts have made to accommodate the individual up the the point of undue hardship.”

It also states that the “duty to accommodate may require employers to consider modifying performance standards or productivity targets.”

When you disclose, your boss owns the problem and you have more control of the situation. But it’s no free pass. He can either accommodate your disability (the easiest and cheaper thing to do), fire you (out of ignorance of the law), or make your life so miserable, you’ll quit. But he can’t legally do the last two and document everything – borderline harassment can be subtle. And don’t ever quit until you have a better situation.

And while it seems easier to let yourself be fired, you’ll never know IF you could do your job better if you had accommodations in place. A good thing to know when you get another job on your own terms. You’ll also have a better case for wrongful dismissal if you disclose before being fired.

I must warn you, though, every attempt will be made to coerce you into leaving to solve their problem. It’s a long, difficult road but again, disclosing can be a game changer. I’m still working there. And I really don’t know which is the worst feeling – being fired or disclosing a disability at work. Been through both. Make sure you emphasize the word disability and use it as many times as you can. My boss tried to call it a “condition” as if it were a headcold. I quickly reminded him it’s a disability.

I know where you’re at right now: I went through the same thing. But, once it’s realized by them that you know your rights and you slowly start to make gradual improvements in your work situation, the pressure will be off you. And when the pressure is off, the work seems easier.

Not to mention the improvement in your self-esteem because you have done something many people are afraid to do – make themselves vulnerable.

I’m no “law-talker”, but you should get some legal or professional advice before proceeding with any of this.

I just think that we as ADDers need to make more of a noise. For too long we have been at the mercy of our disability in the workplace. I saw my experience as trying to level the playing field.

Hope this helps…and good luck.

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[Anonymous]

AddMe, I would think any workplace with that much of a workload is abusing the work staff they have and needs to hire more. That kind of stress is really bad for everyone, not just someone with ADD. Did you know stress is a bigger factor in heart disease than smoking or bad diets or lack of exercise? It is. Any boss who dumps that much on all employees doesn’t care about his workers. He will burn through his work pool and not even blink. Telling him you have ADD won’t move him. He will probably say something along the lines of, “Everyone who takes this job knows what they’re signing up for.” Not really true. Saying it and living it are two different things. He will never put himself in your shoes because he never has to. He’s the boss, he calls the shots. I say find another job where the boss isn’t as abusive and actually likes his staff to be happy and productive.

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[Anonymous]

Thank you all for your supportive words. It means so much to know there are other people out there who understand the extremely uncomfortable spot I’m in right now.

Stacerella, Sounds like you’ve met my boss! It’s difficult to know what is him being unreasonable and what is my disability, and that is what I find the most frustrating.

I will be talking to my Boss tomorrow, I’ll let you guys know how it goes.

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[Patte Rosebank]

@ADDled, that’s exactly what I’m talking about. Thanks for adding to it.

@ADDME, if you have a doctor’s letter explaining your condition and the effects it has on your work, and what accommodations you will need, it will greatly bolster your case.

One more thing…

If your employer deliberately makes things so difficult for you that you’re forced to quit, a little thing called “Constructive Dismissal” enters the picture. That means that even though your employer doesn’t officially fire you, he is deemed to have fired you, by making life on the job so miserable that you’re forced to quit. And the government (both the Ministry of Labour and the Human Rights Commission) regards constructive dismissal as even worse than wrongful dismissal, due to the deviousness of it.

Of course, if you tell your boss about your condition, and he terminates you because of it, that’s grounds for a Human Rights complaint, right there.

When I was having difficulties with my former boss, I secretly documented everything in a journal, noting what he said/did, what I said/did, and how I felt. There were even a couple of times when I secretly had a tiny voice recorder in my pocket, so I had concrete evidence of exactly what was said. I also got copies of pertinent documents that were in my employee file, so I had proof that they knew of my condition. (Under the law, employees are legally entitled to copies of everything in their employee file, so your boss can’t refuse to let you view and copy the file, in the presence of a supervisor or HR person.)

But the nicest thing I got was the satisfaction of knowing that my abusive boss died of a massive heart attack, at the age of 50, about 7 years after wrongfully terminating me and quite a few other employees. Some of us had a disability, and others didn’t, but we were all canned after the boss wrote false, negative performance reviews to justify immediate terminations.

I found out later that all of us had individually pursued the matter with either the Human Rights Commission, or the Ministry of Labour, and received considerably more compensation than the company had originally offered. But, for me, the best revenge is that the bastard is dead, and I’m still here!

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[Anonymous]

Hi, I found this site after watching the program on PBS last night. I’m an RN married to an ADHD husband for 31 years, with five kids 20-30 yrs old now. Two have ADHD, one ADD. I’ve wondered about myself for years but I haven’t really wanted to know for sure. Like ignoring it would make it go away, right? I lost two jobs since January. I will be calling to make a doctor’s appointment this week. I’m so glad I found this site. And if there are any other nurses out there I’d really like to hear from you. It’s never good to lose a job, but in this field it’s possible to kill someone first and whatever confidence I had is virtually gone.

Thanks,

Bonnie BG

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[Curlymoe115]

For me the work wouldn’t be the problem, give me a really tight deadline and throw in a lot of adrenaline and I am humming on all cylinders. But a boss screaming at me would be my invitation to leave. I hate nasty criticism and the fact that this person thinks he has a right to belittle or demean you would be a fast call to the provincial ombudsman. In Alberta we have a lot less protections for disabled workers then most other provinces. But if you can get documentation for a Human Rights case then you should pursue this option if he tries to fire you after you go to him with your diagnoses.

Your best bet may to be to go into one of the Employment offices on your day off or lunch hour and take the Choices test. This will help you pinpoint what you are good at and what kind of place that would be the best for you to work at.

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[Anonymous]

I just lost my job and when I knew I kinda slip it out what I have now I do not have a job

I mean the three probation companies feel they have cart blanc to do what they want

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[Anonymous]

i hear u on how u feel – in the last yr i have had several diff jobs at least 6 and somehow managed to get fired because i wasnt up to standard- even after letting them know i had adhd – i am working now but i am afraid that this one isnt going to last long as i am struggling once again ….. in nova scotia i am not sure if there are those types of provisions in the workplace – was in tears today because i was so frustrated and when i asked questions they were talking to me like i was stupid …. had to take a few to chill out and gather my thoughts and get it together to finish my shift. then screwed up at the end of the nite when closing … soooo not even sure if i have a job come tomorrow morning

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[Anonymous]

Yes that is what happen to me exactly and the hard part for me is constantly explaining to family and friends- they just do not understand us one bit.

I know the tears sometimes I just feel like breaking down and say screw why bother anymore !

I love all these sites but I would love to have an ADD coach but unless I have some amazing dug plan or loads of money it will never happen.

But I do not feel it is right if you make mention to your supervisor they should inform management to make some sort of provisions for you to do your job .

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[billd]

Anyone can “set you up to fail” – recogize it and don’t let it happen to you!

If I had our store today, I’d probably make a point of hiring ADD people, seriously………… thiings might take a little longer, but by golly when it’s done, it’s RIGHT! Not like these screw-offs who rush through projects and they are half-wrong, not well documented……. ugh.

curlymoe is right – when the boss says “we have a problem, and I need this by the end of the day” – and it involves a LOT of steps, I get it done before the end of the day and end up giving him more than requested. the more of an emergency it is, the better I am.

We get a computer hit by a virus, I”m in full swing and actually feel “high” and am SO organized and focused for those moments until I get things done. The key is matching the work to the person – of course, that’s key with ANY person!! Not just us……..

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