First day on meds!

[Anonymous]

Have a good one at work. After my morning post my mind changed. I got busy and haven’t really stopped. Not in hyper way but the day actually seems to be lasting instead of just disappearing. I’m feeling better. Made some homemade vegetable miso soup. Made a mango caesar salad and a rueben for the little lady and I cleaned up after myself, very unusual, cleaned up parts of the kitchen while cooking, organized some shelves, made a grocery list, knocked about 5 other things off my list, and still found time to write these run-on dialogues.

It’s not as amazing as it sounds, and I’m not sure how it will be once I get use to it, but I’m enjoying the little bit of clarity I seem to have. All those anxious thoughts are still there, just under the surface, but they’re not bombarding me like they use to; not so overwhelmed. I’m still mis-placing things but not as bad and feel like I might be remembering better. Time will tell.

Wow, 20mg…let me know what that does. I’m very overweight and 5mg is noticeable to me…not that weight has that much to do with it.

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[Carrie]

Wow! Good for you! Thats a lot done in the day!

Im happy to say ive had my “WOW/Ah-ha” moment!! I took 20mg today around 11am and then again at 4pm… And noticed while on it I could listen to and follow everything my co-worker said! Not once did I start to zone out and hope she didnt realize I had no idea what shes saying as I gazed blankly into an eye… I try to look at both to mix it up… hahahaha Around 10pm when it wore off, she was talking away and I had no idea what was being said! hahaha I just couldnt believe it! It REALLY helps! I also made my way downtown without panicking once again. Normally I cant do errands, just too much going on at once. But I did it! Hooray!

As for the 20mg… Well I was first started on 5mg of Dexedrine last week and no change. Then I took 10mg and still not a thing. So my doctor told me to take 10mg the first few days to get my body used to it and then take 10-20mg as needed twice a day. Being severely disappointed with the Dexedrine I took 20mg right away. No side effects at all… like headache, loss of appetite, insomnia, that “nervous” feeling. Nothing. Like I said, I didnt even think it was really working until tonight! I am starting to see the difference. My next question will be to my doctor what dose I should be at… Is 10mg enough? Or should I continue with 20mg because I am seeing no side effects or adverse reactions… or should we up the dose more to see if there is a bigger change? I dont know! I am due to see her in about another week to update and reassess.

I am testing myself while on and off the med to try and see differences… I know tonight was a REAL one, not something I could justify to myself. I am quite pleased!

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[Anonymous]

I get you on your story about listening to your colleague. I have had the same experience. I was on the phone with a couple of people yesterday and could follow everything being said…too funny. My colleague, who knows I drift out, even while staring at him, noticed a difference on Friday with me. He could tell.

This morning I don’t feel as good an experience as Ive been having. Still got a bit done but feel I’m really procrastinating. Is it too soon to start changing my dose? my doc originally asked me to try 10 mg ritalin. I tried that once and it was to buzzy. Since then I’ve been doing 5mg, 3 times a day, but only for 2 days (started thursday afternoon). My 2nd dose is due in an hour so I think I will try 10 again. I’m also in the test mode. I’m uncertain if I’m just getting use to the feeling or what’s going on. I’ll report later on the difference with 10mg. Have a good one.

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[Anonymous]

Hi Carrie,

Good to see you are starting to see some positive changes in the way your are….i think its important to understand the differences in certain areas can be subtle when the meds work, its also contextual so you don’t observe the difference all the time and in the end it is different for everyone so the effect of the medication you get when first taking it might not be evident at first. Keep at your routine and keep challenging yourself and i am sure you will see other aspects of yourself different when taking the meds.

After 2 1/2 weeks on meds, i’m still learning about myself and realizing that by being ADD, I’ve developed certain behaviors to avoid situations were i have to cope with the symptoms of adhd. Its a slow rebuilding process but im looking forward to it.

Keep it up!

John

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[Carrie]

Hey John! Good to hear about the progress you are making as well!

Redriver – What times do you take your meds? Right now I am taking them twice a day as prescribed by my doctor but find I dont have enough coverage throughout the day. I either skip the morning, or skip the afternoon. Im gonna talk to doc about taking it 3 times.

I find I really notice the difference when off the meds. I guess while on I just do things automatically without thinking. Today I am going to only take 10mg to see if thats all I need instead of the 20mg.

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[Carrie]

Good morning, good morning!

Bluesman! Thats great that he noticed a difference! My husband hasnt really noticed one with me, no one really! hahaha But I am noticing a lot now!

Yesterday morning I took 10mg, but felt that wasnt quite enough, so in the evening took 20mg and actually found that to be too much. I was on edge. This morning I took 15mg and feel great! I had my son all ready for school and got him there on time with no panic attack, I even made conversation with another mom when normally I jet in, and jet out trying not to make any eye contact hahaha My laundry and dishes are going.

When I came home on… Sunday from my evening shift I found my whole house to be spotless! Even the laundry done! Floors all shining, windows sparkling! I couldnt believe my eyes! My mom and grandma came over when I left for work, together with my husband, cleaned everything for me! My mom watched the “ADD and loving it?!” video and is understanding how the ADD brain works so thought she would help me out and get me organized! Now that im on meds I want to keep it this way! I am quite happy about how my brain is… not slower but… quieter! I can actually think and finish a thought before rushing to a next and organize myself and get things done!

My dad called me yesterday and told me he watched the movie as well. I am EXACTLY like him (my profile pic is the 2 of us haha) in the ways we think and I am 100% sure he has ADD too… He was thinking maybe he was because of the things I was telling him, but I told him to watch the video and he will see. He did, and he believes without a doubt he has it too. I am very happy for him because it really has taken over his life and has caused him a lot of trouble. I know it will change his outlook and life once he has proper meds and learns how to deal and use it to his advantage! My mom now understands why my dad is the way he is. Before she thought he just didn’t listen or care too because he always “zoned out” and he is very impulsive which has caused him problems with money. Now my mom is understanding about it and not hurt or angry anymore. Very exciting!

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[Anonymous]

Carrie, wow..you just posted. YOur description of your dad sounds kind of like me. My wife is appreciative of what we’re learning about me, and our kids, together. It’s a bit of a relief.

Yes, my experience with the meds has been mixed. At first I had that kind of wow? Now I have to stop to notice the difference. Yesterday my first dose of 10 didn’t seem to be doing as much so I took 15 for my second. I felt a little bit edgy too, but I also had an afternoon coffee, so maybe that’s what did it. This morning on 10 seems to help but I’m either getting use to the feeling, already forgetting what I was like, or my experience is skewed because I’m battling bronchitis and a cold. Regardless, the difference is subtle, but better. My worry now is that I’m going to run out of meds before my next doctor appointment. My doc seems down on the pharmaceutical route and I just know he’s going to give me grief when I tell him I need 3 doses a day, not 2, and for weekends too.

One of the biggest things I’ve noticed is that I’m not as worried, concerned, overwhelmed about everything. The pile of issues are still there, but I’m able to deal with it better; sort of calmed. One of my jobs today is to journal my experiences so far, so that I remember what this part of the journey was like and so I don’t forget how difficult things were just days ago. I also have to initiate testing for my kids (mid-20 adults). I don’t want them to wait as long as their old man.

Check out the Blog spot on this site. They’ve got “homework” for us to do. Week 2 is to always take an extra second to pick something up or put something away. I’m trying to do it.

Have a good one.

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[Carrie]

I dont think coffee and Ritalin are a good mix! hahaha That may be why you were edgy.. I would try the 15mg without it Im not sure how quickly or if the body adjusts to the Ritalin, but maybe skip a day of dosage to see if there is a difference? I found there is even though I dont feel any different while on it… Like I said, it wasnt until I STOPPED for a day I saw the difference! I hope everything works out with your doctor!

Glad to hear your anxiety has went down. I find thats the best part! I can do things now without the panic and overwhelming feeling of simple everyday tasks! I think the journal is a great idea, and testing for your kids too! Mine are still a bit young yet, 4 and 5… But im keeping a close eye on them! Just like you said, I dont want them to have to go through it if they dont have to!

Thanks for letting me know about the challenge! Im very excited for it! The first challenge I didn’t do because we never eat by the PC and we dont have cable, satellite, any of that (only because we never watch it so why pay?), and we all eat at the table as a family.

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[Anonymous]

Hey Carrie, I never answered you about my dosage times. I take my first around 7 am, 2nd at 12, 3rd around 5 or 6. Yes, I told my doctor today that I was taking them 3 times a day even though he only said to take them twice. I asked him for more, because I’ll run out, and he said for me to re-schedule before I run out. I can tell he’s worried that I don’t know what I’m doing. He also said I shouldn’t need them on the weekend or the evenings. He said many people don’t like the way they feel so they take a break from the meds when they don’t need them. I said, “doc, the worst side-effect I’ve been having is when i come off the pill and am re-introduced to my former distracted, confuesed, self : D ” I also told him that my life is in chaos, not just at work but the rest of it too! We’re renovating two homes, one we are moving out of and one we are moving into, I’ve got estate stuff to deal with from my mom’s death last year, I’ve got tons of projects I’ve started that are in varying stages of completion, family issues, and the list goes on….why wouldn’t I want some help after work? Anyway, that’s my rant.

I have to tell you something funny re dosage and not dosing at all.

Yesterday, I forgot if I took my second pill (no, I’m not ADD…it’s almost like Alzeimer’s started for me in my 20’s). I waited about 40 minutes and decided I must not have taken it. About 1 1/2 hours later, as I was driving with my wife looking at homes, I realized I was on 20 mg…had to be. It was like a caffeine buzz, but i didn’t have a coffee. Anyway, it didn’t make me more efficient and left me feeling odd, so I know 20 is too high for me, right now. To make up for it, I decided to not take a 3rd dose. I plunked down in front of my computer in the kitchen, prepared to get lots done, and realized around 10 pm that i wasted the whole night…trying with all my might! The noises in the house took my brain for a ride. I couldn’t follow what i read, I couldn’t type my thoughts, I really was disgusted. That’s why I’m sticking to 3 doses. They only last about 4 1/2 – 6 hours for me; doesn’t seem consistent. Anyway, that’s my ramble for the day.

BTW, did a lot of journalling today on my experiences leading up to and including meds. I recommmend it, before you forget who you were. Ciao.

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[Carrie]

hahaha its funny how you accidentally took too much! I did the SAME thing today. I forgot what time I took my first 15mg and took another 15mg I figure about 2 hours too early! I was very spaced out and felt so wired at the same time! Sheesh My goodness your life is pretty hectic right now eh? I agree on needing more coverage in a day thats for sure. Each dose lasts about 5 hours for me and im up at 7am and in bed around 12am.

I didnt take my dose until after I brought my son to school and sure enough, I zipped in, zipped out and didnt make eye contact haha I also found it next to impossible to get my butt up to do anything at all! Thats the way I was always before, it seemed to take so much energy to do simple everyday tasks. I took my meds and got the dishes done, 4 loads of laundry, folded and put away, kept the fire going and had my kids all neatly packed for their sleep over at grandmas, emailed some inquiries about working overseas, and found myself a financial adviser, as well as got ready for work! Im just loving it!

Heres another big change! I had a meeting at work today, a lame power-point, and WOW!! Just WOW!! I could actually keep up and focus the whole time!! I couldnt believe it! Normally I go off into my own “cartoon world” (I doodle.. a lot! should see my college notes… doodles up one side and down the other).

Great to hear about your journal success. I dont know if im gonna do it. Really I wouldnt care to remember that me… plus if I want to remember I can just stop the meds for a few days hahaha Ive been keeping all my focus on my future right now. Been planning all the things I want to take my kids to experience… Like where milk and food comes from. I want to take them to a farm so they can learn and see, and to the Science museum on the space tour! A hot air ballon ride! Disneyland! West Edmonton Mall! And of course live in another country for a year so they can experience another culture! Ive also been thinking a lot goals I want to acheive. Retirement savings, education savings, family vacations, health goals, etc! Ive been busy these last 2 days searching the web and finding ways to make this all a reality. Why I searched out a financial adviser as well. Im hoping I can learn how to be smart with my money!

Well, I should be off to bed. Gotta get up in 5hours and go back to work! Talk to ya tomorrow!

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[Anonymous]

Sounds like you’ve got great plans. That’s fantastic.

At 51, it would be easy for me to regret that I didn’t start meds and coaching earlier, but I have led a pretty fortunate life, all things considered.

My kids don’t feel they missed out. We did a lot of camping, cottaged at friend’s places, boated, fished, and many more outdoorsy things. The biggest problem was likely my self-medicating, primarily with alcohol, as that had some negative impact on life. Nothing bizarre, like major drama episodes, but more like hangovers effecting quality time and/or health. Anyway, that’s a thing of the past.

I’m also even more hopeful about the future now, as I’m getting a better handle on life.

Sounds like you’re doing really well, and that the meds have had a positive impact in a short time.

Make sure you get to bed earlier though : D Need that rest to be your best!

BTW, love your references to keeping the fire going. Our new place is going to have a real fireplace…..so looking forward to that. We won’t rely on it as a heat source, which sounds like your case, but still, something real cozy about it. Take care.

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[Carrie]

Its good to hear you don’t regret having the meds and coaching soon in life. I think thats a great outlook! I have an uncle whos now 42 and “has nothing to show for it” as he says. He is a crack addict, and I told him as long as he has breath there is hope. Its never too late. Unless of course he dies hahahaha Sorry I have a warped sense of humor. Anyways… My dad had a lot of problems with alcohol too, just like you always took us out to do outdoorsy things! Fishing, hunting, river rides, firewood etc. I dont feel I missed out as well.

A new place is always exciting! Enjoy your new fireplace! I like wood heat, I just wish it would stoke itself, and get itself, and split itself and clean up after itself…. My husband is good for all that! Mwa ha ha ha haaaaaa

I am still looking for an ADD coach. The city 40mins from here doesnt have one, so im gonna try south. The city an hour away. Its a little bigger and maybe I can find someone there! Ive been doing pretty good though and found that “FlyLady” someone here had suggested very helpful!

You do have a coach?

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[Anonymous]

Hi Carrie and Bluesman!

tonight I’ve been reading through your posts. I started on meds about 18 months ago and have never looked back. I knew I was an ADDer for a long time. Working as a teacher, I learned about it in school (recognized my dad had it), realized I had it, and yes, so did my son.

My son was put on meds way back ‘when’ and at that time, there was only ritalin available. By that I mean the new release formulations were not available. When I started meds, my doc put me on Concerta (the newest slow release of ritalin available). It is great for me and saves me from having to take multiple doses throughout the day. The regular release plain vanilla form really only lasts 4 hours. Most kids who used this old form of it took it every 4 hours on a school day. First dose was taken at home in the morning before leaving for school and the second dose would be taken 4 hours later which usually concided with their lunch break. That’s when the kids would all troop down to the office for the next dose. many docs didn’t give them a third dose because it caused difficulties for some of them to settle down to sleep.

Concerta is wonderful for a nice even release of the meds (the original sloooow release form of ritalin wasn’t so great- I saw how it didn’t work for my son and how it didn’t work for the kids I worked with). In fact, I often used to think I hadn’t even given my son his slow release dose! So he had to go back to good old ‘regular’ ritalin. Concerta works well for me and it seems to work well for the kids that I monitor doses for at school. (reminder to me- Fill out that SNAP form for student ‘x’ tomorrow!)

My psychiatrist gives me a script for using Concerta every day (including weekends) and has even given me the good old ‘regular’ ritalin for using in the evening for those days that just keep going and going. Report card writing time, evening commitments, etc. In fact, the first time I used my evening dose I attended an opera in TO because a friend was in town and wanted to attend a show. I’m not an opera buff but she was working on her Master’s in voice. Hey, it’s her thing and she was a visitor! How did it work that night? Fabulous! Who knew that sitting all the way through Madame Butterfly could be so wonderful!

Have you considered looking into Concerta instead of just using ritalin? It seems to bypass the ups and downs that ritalin causes. I just use plain for my 18 hour days where I want extended focus. (BTW, I use 72mg of Concerta and use only 10mg of ritalin for my evening dose. 10 mg of ritalin is not equivalent to a 72 mg dose of Concerta, it’s a lower dosage but all I want to use for the evening.)

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[Carrie]

I think thats a good idea! I never forget to take my second dose… I just forget the time I took my first dose hahaha They say to take it at a regular time to avoid that… but when you only have a limited dose I try to keep it for when I think I need it most in the day.

I am making an appointment with my Doctor either Monday or Tuesday so I will talk to her about it. The Ritalin is working well, so I dont see why she wouldnt agree.

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[Anonymous]

thanks Zsazsa, My doc wants to see me in a couple of weeks to talk about what’s working. I don’t think he’s very well versed in ADD medications so everything I learn is helpful. I would love to have a longer-lasting formula. I messed up again tonight. We were out appliance shopping, I was able to listen and learn so well, and then i realized I was drifting out, catching my reflection in the shiny stainless steel, noticing the cool lights, but missing things my wife and the salesman were discussing….with me! Looked at my phone and realized I was an hour late for my last dose; likely why I’m still up typing LOL. Anyway, I’ll be learning as I go and everyone’s advice is helpful. So far the ritalin is really a blessing….not a miracle, but a blessing : )

Carrie, I spoke to a coach for the first time last night…just on the phone, but it was so encouraging. I’m attending a group session for adults with ADHD tomorrow and will let you know how it went. Nighty nite!

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