yeah, that's a felony.

[Anonymous]

in 2007(ish) I finally pieced it together that maybe I have ADD, after years of the usual defeat.

I spoke with my GP and her response was, “that certainly sounds like a textbook case to me.”

she started me on 10mg of generic Adderall XR, and immediately the differenced was clear.

unfortunately, within about a month, the doctor I had been seeing evidently got a new job so

I was passed off between two different doctors, with whom I felt much less connection.

long story short, after two years of wonderful success while taking Adderall XR, I lost my insurance

and had to switch to the IR version of the med. it took me a while to figure it out, but after failing at

least one class Fall semester and floundering through the first half of Spring semester before

ultimately withdrawing from school, I finally realized that the IR was not giving me nearly the help

that the XR had.

I went to speak to my doctor and fumbled through articulating that “it just feels like it wears off by

early afternoon” she responded that, “people usually experience difficulty concentrating after lunch.”

at this point I tearfully explained to her that “I just want to be able to have a job and do things like

everyone else and contribute to society.” her response? “maybe that’s just not for you…”

so, I thought to myself, “okay. this is certainly not the first time a doctor has failed to take my concerns

seriously” (when I was 21 I was *finally* diagnosed with a growth on my pituitary glad, after a year of

my doc at the time telling me that not getting my period for a year, and lactating was “just stress”…).

anyway, I decided that if my doctor wasn’t going to help me, I would figure out a “solution” to the problem

myself… so, I tried just making a copy of one of my prescriptions and was amazed to find that no one so

much as batted an eye at me at the pharmacy. and, for a few months taking 20mg morning and afternoon

helped, and then about six months later I “increased my does” to 30mg twice a day. simple solutions to

modern living…

the thing is, I had literally no sense of how much trouble I was getting myself into. my doctor had said to

me on a few occasions that the main problem with Adderall is that people sell it on the street and use it

to get high. this seemed ridiculous to me because getting “high” is pretty much the exact opposite of what

happens to me when I take the med. not only that, but I thought, “sell it on the street?! I don’t even so much

as speak to 99% of people in my life about the fact that I take it! I would never do anything to make the

problem worse!”

then one morning the cops showed up at my house and we took a little ride. when they “interviewed” me

I just told them the truth about everything assuming that under the circumstances my situation would make

as much sense to them as it did to me. anyone who has had any exposure to the legal system already knows

that you (apparently) don’t talk to the cops. I didn’t know that. I’ve never been in any kind of *major* trouble

in my life! I never got a minor, I’ve never had a DUI, I never even got suspended from school, and I had

certainly never been arrested….

but, now I’m facing 5th degree felony charges. felony. as in, can’t vote, can’t pass a criminal background

check, can’t carry a weapon (not that I would, but it *is* a constitutional right)… because I have no prior

history of any kind of criminal behavior it is most likely that I’ll be on probation for a while and then it will

be removed from my record. fine.

the bigger problem I’d been facing was that apparently now according to my family, doctors, police, etc

I must have made up my entire life experience with ADD because I am an ADDICT. I went to see one new

doctor (not a specialist) and immediately told her everything that had been going on and explained my

whole situation, at which point she laid into me about how I obviously need treatment. I don’t know what

it is about me, but all my life family and professionals alike have felt compelled to tell me that there is

“nothing really the matter” – but consistently in the long run it ends up coming out that there really IS

something the matter.

anyway, before this whole nightmare started I had already decided that I was going to restart school in the

fall. by midterm I was already terribly behind and ended up having to drop 1 of the 2 classes I was taking.

I decided to go see a specialist and instead of telling him about my whole legal disaster, I would just be

honest about my experience with ADD as an unmedicated person, and see how he responded. he didn’t

hesitate in the least to give me a “combined” ADHD diagnosis, and right away we started with 50mg of

Vyvanse, which unfortunately made me very dizzy, sick to my stomach, terrible headache. I saw him again

and he went with 40mg of Adderall IR right off the bat.

I haven’t told him yet about all of this mess from before. Obviously I have learned my lesson, and know now

how serious all of this is and would never even consider doing anything like it ever again. I really want to tell

him because deliberately keeping secrets feels horrible to me. The only reason I didn’t tell him in the first place

was because I wanted him to be able to hear my experience with open ears.

I feel so helpless. I understand now that what I did was a crime, and I do feel that I should be expected to pay

the consequences for it, but having to spend the rest of my life struggling to function when I know there is help

out there does not seem like a fair price to pay.

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[billd]

Right there is another “sign” of ADD – doing things and not fully considering consequences. Ouch.

I feel for you in so many ways…….. but looking at all sides, consider the risks to your health (long-term adderall can cause some serious health issues no matter how good you feel. I’m on it, but all the digging I’ve done has made me decide I won’t use this for the rest of my life.) plus – maybe you did it for reasons you could justify or that made sense, no mal-intent, but of 100, you’d be the only 1, the other 99 they have to deal with may have some stories that they have made up. So….. laws are put into place.

Not criticizing, as I bet you are punishing yourself as much as anyone else is, but it’s one of those tough spots. Working in the same building at the Iowa Department of Corrections – yeah, I see a lot of cases where someone made a single mistake and they will pay for it for life – even if that was their one and only mistake, and they had no mal-intent.

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[Anonymous]

I totally agree that probably in most other cases like this, folks have intentions of misusing or selling the medication.

certainly there are laws for a reason. what troubles me is that if it is such a big deal, there needs to be a consistent

and effective standard of securing prescriptions put into place so that we’re not wasting resources on the back end

punishing people for crimes that could easily be prevented. maybe all prescriptions must be notarized by the doc

using one of those stamps that pushes the paper up. that can’t cost more than jail and trial for all such cases.

in all seriousness, though, right now it is *way* too easy if someone like me, using no extra time, mental energy or

technology outside of the home, can make an effective replica that doesn’t even cause the pharmacy worker to take

a second glance. there is a simple, inexpensive, and “fool proof” solution to this problem. I’m sure of it. I just have

no idea how to get an idea like this put into action.

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[billd]

If you were in this state – I could get you pointed to the folks who might help prevent such things…… it’s a big meth place here so they take these things seriously, and are always looking for ways to make things better. It’s happened, can’t undo it – maybe help others now, like you are already doing.

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[Anonymous]

Out of curiosity, I checked out my son’s Concerta prescription, as we are in a different country. Our “controlled drug” prescritions must first be phoned through to a government department, by the treating doctor, and approval given. The doc then gets an approval number, which is written on the prescription, and the number of tablets, the dosage, and amount of repeats prescribed are documented by the government department. Then the doctor must write the prescription, on a special prescription pad, in his own handwriting. This copy stays attached to the pharmacy printed stuff that get printed out when they fill the prescription. The pharmacy also sticks a dispensing label onto the back of the original, handwritten prescription, to show that it has been dispensed by them.

So anyone can tell, by looking at the prescription, how many times it has been filled. The chemist cannot fill the script if the original document is not handed over, and it would be very difficult to copy the original, as handwriting leaves an indent that a copy would not have, pen does not look quite right when copied, and the dispensing stickers are not there. Also, the approval number allows for the script to be tracked – when it is filled, how many repeats are left, and if it is cancelled (such as when a doc changes a patient to a different medication or dose). So even if a chemist gets given a very good copy, they can tell if a false script is presented due to the dispensing stickers not matching with what the “tracking” system says has been dispensed.

All is all, it’s a pretty good system, but it doesn’t stop kids from selling their prescription meds on the street.

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[munchkin]

LSA – What a tragedy! I’ve had some really awful things happen due to being backed in a corner, but somehow always managed to clear it up. It seems so senseless and unfair sometimes, but I understand why the laws have to exist. This is a cautionary tale for us all to be aware of legal consequences. We are so used to finding ways around the normal rules which never work for us, but when it comes to the law – ouch – it’s usually not too forgiving. I hope you can get through the process to keep it off your record – that’s the last thing you need holding you back. I was able to get rid of a possible criminal record due to my horrible check writing fiasco’s by going to classes and paying a lot of money. It was worth it – I wouldn’t be able to hold the job I have right now if I hadn’t straightened that out! (I’ve never used checks again!)

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[resipsa]

If haven’t consulted an attorney, you should.

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[Anonymous]

I just got a prescription for Adderall XR recently and the restrictions on these type drugs made it a little more difficult than any other prescription I’d ever gotten. The dr has to give you an actual written prescription (can be typed) and you can only get one month at a time, plus my insurance wouldn’t pay for it until the dr called and cleared it with them. That took a couple of days.

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[billd]

Quote:

If haven’t consulted an attorney, you should.

Best post all day………… dunno why I didn’t think of that…. oh, yeah, add……..

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[sdwa]

Yes, you need a lawyer.

It makes me angry that it is so hard to get help. People who are supposed to know what they are doing often don’t have a clue.

You don’t have to tell your current doctor a damn thing. It’s none of his business.

Also, it is never to your advantage to talk to the police, because it’s their job to use that information to get a conviction. Even if you had done nothing, talking to them would have been a bad idea. (For those in the U.S., see http://www.flexyourrights.org)

Often I think we feel that because we have ADHD we don’t deserve basic respect, or that we’re inherently “bad” – personally I don’t think you deserve to go to jail over this. A competent doctor would have helped you in the first place.

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[Anonymous]

my dad actually is an attorney… he’s been helping me, but he moved to the other side of the country about a year ago, so there is only so much he can do to help right now.

the first time I had to appear in court I mistakenly went to the main courthouse instead of the venue on the other side of town – thankfully I was an hour early there just to make sure I wouldn’t be late, because once I figured out that I was in the wrong place I first wandered around in a tearful panic for ten minutes until by some miracle I bumped into a friend who literally put me on the correct bus. I walked into the courtroom not even a minute before proceedings began and had to sit through every other appearance until, at last, when it was my turn I stood up in front of the judge by myself, clutching my application for a public defender, because I didn’t understand that I was supposed to turn it back in after I had filled it out. from that point it only got worse. she literally wouldn’t believe a single word I said and repeated every question at least three times: “You’re thirty?” Yes, ma’am. “You’re THIRTY?” Yes, ma’am, I am. “Thirty.” Yes, I am thirty years old. I was born in 1981. She also refused to take me at my word that I fall well below the income guidelines that qualify me for representation by a public defender, and required me to provide proof, whereas every other person appearing that day was taken at their word. the whole time I wanted to ask whether she knows the first thing about ADHD, because if she did, every single thing about my case and my lateness and my apparent immaturity at the age of thirty would make perfect sense. instead I just hung my head. (all of this took place without the help of any medication. hopefully it is clear that I am far more organized when I have medication available …not that it is the only/whole solution, but I am fortunate in that it helps me tremendously.)

ANYWAY… yes, finally I have been appointed a public defender and so far she has been very understanding and helpful. she also offered to speak with my doctor to back me up regarding the fact that (although the rest of my life has always been a huge mess) I have never had any legal trouble whatsoever prior to this. so, it sounds like I’ll mostly just have to spend a year or two peeing in a cup, which is absolutely no problem, and then it will be taken off of my record and when I finally finish school I can (hopefully) still get a job as a social worker at the Veterans’ hospital in my town. …all I want in the world is to keep my symptoms managed well enough that I can consistently contribute something good to my community, while also regularly balancing my checkbook, doing chores at home, and listening without getting distracted while my loved ones speak to me. for a lot of people this is just “living” but for me it is something to strive for every day.

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[munchkin]

I feel for you LSA – I didn’t know about ADHD when I went through the bad check thing, but I knew what I did was a mistake, and not meant to hurt anyone or gain anything. It really hurts to be treated like a criminal. Please don’t take it to heart – just learn what, if anything, you can from the experience. I’ve had to learn the hard way what I can or can’t handle, and try to have the humility to get help or avoid the things that are just too risky. (I pay all my bills with money orders or cash)

I wonder if you can have someone to help advocate for you with doctors in the future so you won’t be in a situation like that?

I’ll never forget when I was prescribed a controlled prescription for insomnia, and I left the doctor thinking it was an “as needed” type of thing. When I showed up three days earlier than I was supposed to asking for a refill, I was treated like a drug addict by the pharmacy and doctor’s office. I ended up having a horrible withdrawal, including seizure-like symptoms, that could have been life threatening – all because I misunderstood what was told to me during the doctor’s appointment. I was too humiliated to go to the ER or ever talk to my doc about what went wrong. I just went off the med and never asked for it again.

Good Luck – I hope you can get to the other side of this soon!

-Munch

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[billd]

If you need a character witness………… me.

My son made some bad decisions due to ADD (and due to some of them, I’ll never again see him) so I can relate there to what it can “make you do”, or at least the WHY of it – and being on meds now, geesh, it’s not a solution and isn’t doing much for my ADD – but are my sleep issues going away!)

I’ve also owned a business (several really, but one was a retail store) and I can tell you – not all bad check writers are evil…….. I know from experience there, too. Oh, a few are just plain crooks, but don’t lump ’em all together.

I also work in the same building as the state DOC – and I see the ladies from the prison here on work release. I really really really feel for some of them. Bad mistakes and they will pay forever. A few deserve what they get, and maybe the others should indeed be punished, but I don’t like the branding and treatment some of them get.

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[sdwa]

LSA –

Just remember some people are douchebags. I went to a magistrate once to contest a parking ticket, and the guy treated me extremely disrespectfully, and then expressed disbelief when I told him I’m a graphic artist – “YOU’RE a graphic designer???” He was an ass. People in the court system are almost always complete jerks. Goes with the territory. Every time I’ve been called to jury duty the attorneys have been total douchebags to me. Think about the kind of personality who wants to spend their lives judging the behavior of others, i.e. Judges – and the amount of ego they must have, the incredible self-righteousness they must have, to even be willing to make those kinds of decisions.

Sorry for that mini-rant, but all I’m trying to say is: Don’t internalize it. You are not “bad.” The whole thing about people with ADHD being “immature” offends me.

Seriously. Look at the world. As if it were run by such geniuses. As if the so-called “normal” people were in any way kinder, more generous, more loving, more insightful, or more capable of peace or healing.

Since my ADHD diagnosis a few years back, I have come to deeply appreciate the term “differently-abled.”

I hope you can get a professional, like a doctor or some other expert type of person, to help with your defense. I bet CHADD has information about ADHD and dealing with the courts, which you might want to look into.

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[memzak]

LSA – I decided a couple of months ago to write a book. The main focus is hidden disabilities and general attitudes toward people with them, the court system’s treatment of people with hidden disabilities and the number of ADDers that end up in prison. My research has shown that between 25% to 75% of the prison population has ADHD depending on which study you look at. With approximately 7.5% of the population (again depending on which study you look at) suffering with ADHD this is a highly disproportionate representation of ADDers in the prison population. We have problems with judgment, as we all know, and it can land us in unfair positions. Currently, the United States court system does not recognize ADD as an “excuse” for making a mistake. I understand (have not totally confirmed yet) that in England, they screen people for ADHD before sending them to prison. I have gotten a glimpse of an attitude of greater acceptance of ADHD there.

I am having my own problems with the legal system. Fortunately I have a lawyer and when I went to traffic court by myself to get a postponement so I could get enough money to pay my lawyer, the judge was very nice and understanding. Since I already had a lawyer he was very willing to grant a postponement. I was terrified. I almost could not speak. This is my worst nightmare. To unintentionally do something that would get me in trouble with the law. I was driving my car with no insurance. I had lost my job, changed my insurance from auto pay to paper billing and forgot about it. I was having nightmares about going to prison, convinced that I was going to die. I also have never been in trouble before. I was so depressed at the time because I had lost my latest and last job that I did not get chatty.

My book writing has stalled a little because my husband is dying. They told him today that he is dying and it was just a matter of time. He is only 62. And I sometimes wonder why I can’t seem to get anything done. DUH

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[Author]

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