Forum Replies Created
-
AuthorPosts
-
TY for the reply.
I am an old hat at this. At 56, I have been “Laid Off”, fired, or given “special projects” until I found another job, for almost 35 years. I have NEVER had a job longer than 2 years, and most of them last somewhere between 6-12mo. Unlike my coworkers, who get employee of the month, I don’t take 2 hour lunches, I work at my desk and I don’t surf the web during work hours. I rarely have conversations in the hallway about anything but work. I don’t read news papers in the breakrooms, bathrooms, or empty meeting rooms. I do my work. That is what I am paid to do.
For me, I am always looking for a job, because I know the one I have, won’t last very long. So my resume is always up to date and my cube has nothing in it.
REPORT ABUSEIn Washington state, there is a section of the educational code I-530 or something like that. It provides care for kids in the educational system for kids who have special needs. Blindness, Dyslexia, ADD, anything. Now. The trick is to get your child into the program. It is tough, because the program costs money to run. Our educational system is not about helping kids, it’s about money. Sad but true. They will resist you, and wait you out. This works with almost everyone. Eventually they give up or their child goes to the next school. Time is on their side.
I was lucky enough to get mine in that program before 2008, when the schools were spending money like water. Now, my child has had a “miraculous” cure from his disabilities and can be main-streamed without any problem. It amazes me sometimes how shallow the waters are in which the bureaucrat’s mind swims.
Persistence is the key. Get an advocate, a teacher, the school nurse, anyone. I know it is tough with us ADDers to be persistent, when we are going in a million directions. Get help from a friend or a neighbor if that is what it takes to get results. Your child’s doctor might be a good resource as well.
I hope this helps.
REPORT ABUSEI will be going back to school to get my second PhD, does that count? 🙄
The first couple times I went to college to get a degree, were abysmal failures. I was spending WAY too much time on homework, and studying and still failing. Nothing seemed to work. I was in pre med and the memorization was driving me nuts. I wanted to be a Psychiatrist. It took me 6 months to figure out the only classes I did well in, were the math and sciences. So now I am an astrophysicist. How I got there is a whole long story.
The moral of the story, is to find something you enjoy doing that you can do.
I don’t know about you, but I tend to do things because they are a challenge. In the process I overlook the things that are fun. I hope this helps.
REPORT ABUSEI read this post, and reread it. I thought about it and I have had to wait for a while so I can organize my thoughts. At first I thought you were joking, then I thought you were out of your mind, and now I think you are serious and I am ready to address your points.
In my experience, ADD or not, I have seen people who are completely unfit as parents. These are people who should have NEVER reproduced. Weather I fall into that category, I don’t know. Since my wife and I adopted all our children, we went through several rounds of evaluations to see if we were “suitable” parents who will provide a safe environment for the children. Had we had our own, the only requirement for parenthood, would be if we could fog a mirror.
As far as genetics goes. Yes we pass ADD on to our sons and daughters. Is this a debilitating condition? Sometimes, it would seem so, but there are so many positives that FAR out weigh the negatives. We and society have to adapt and learn how to tap into that vast potential, instead of squashing it by trying to make us conform. We are not like “normal” people out there; we think differently and the world is ordered for the majority of people out there. It is out of sync with how we deal with it.
For some of us, we need coaches and a support system to mesh with society. We take medication, go to counseling and we try to adapt. Society is adapting as well. Not fast enough to suit me, but hopefully fast enough to suit our children.
For us to marry and have children, it is a personal choice. If the government wants to test me and evaluate me as a “good” parent. Great. Let’s do it for everyone. let’s license people for parenthood. Governments don’t want to do that. They don’t want to take away that choice, except in the most extreme cases. Because once they do, it starts them down a very slippery slope.
REPORT ABUSEMay 5, 2011 at 8:29 pm in reply to: The issue of who to tell and who not to tell about my ADHD #103596I’ve been tested and under treatment for the last couple months. I haven’t told anyone outside my wife and my kids, who are older now. They pretended to know, by sagely nodding their heads at all the right spots. If I get to be a “Permanent” employee anywhere, I will consider telling my boss, but I probably will never tell an employer. I will be telling my extended family very soon and I am not really looking forward to that.
REPORT ABUSELoner.
I have lots of people who I know, but nobody I could call a friend. I dislike parties and get togethers. Too many people and conversations that take so much concentration and energy to filter out. That leaves me alone in a crowd. I am uncomfortable that nobody is talking , sitting, or eating with me, and somewhat envious of people who appear to be having fun. Mostly I am watching the clock, and looking for a chance to fade away and escape.
My counselor is adding mild agoraphobia to the list of conditions I have. I am fine with the out of doors, it’s just people that make me uneasy.
I don’t know if it is the ADD that makes it worse, or some other “trauma” I suffered. All I know is I am much more comfortable with my own thoughts, doing my own things. I am working on channeling my thoughts so I can write stories and possible a book.
REPORT ABUSEIf you can, start recording ALL your conversations with your supervisor and co workers. Your situation is a classic Harassment issue. DO NOT tell anyone you are recording. It makes them nervous. In non criminal matters, you don’t need to announce recordings. Turn over your notes to HR and keep the recordings, in the event you need them later. I am a vet, and I have been in a very similar situation.
REPORT ABUSEI feel your pain, TF. I hit the forums button and the hot topics are on the top right. I completely ignore the front page or main page. It changes too much. I have a combination of ADD and Dyslexia, and I have a real problem with pattern recognition. The ordinary rules of minimizing white space do not apply to Dyslexics and ADDrs. Having to drill down several levels to get the information we want, is at times beyond our capabilities. Normal web design practices do not apply as well. Please keep that in mind, when you are adding content to the site.
REPORT ABUSESo… does it go away when we are on meds, or is it unaffected by meds?
I don’t get the “wormy” feelings.. I get the feeling I just stepped on an ant hill and they are crawling all over me.
Great post, Janet!!!
REPORT ABUSEShort answer… Yes.
Sorry, but it’s a genetic thing. It is something you are born with, and it is something you are going to die with. Good news is that along the way, you get to learn more about how your brain works than most psychologists. You are going to be more self aware. and you will learn more skills to help you in life. Look at what you have accomplished so far.
REPORT ABUSEI do the leg bouncing thing, but if I have to sit still for any length of time, I get the “Itchies” where random parts of my body itch. and I start squirming in my seat. It usually starts with my socks which fold up around my toes… then there are shirt tags… Those are the worst, and I have cut the tags out of most of them, My pants fold up behind my knees… that bothers. Of course being inattentive to begin with, any hope of following a meeting is lost. Going to church is pure torture, and I would rather be ANYWHERE than having to endure that. I am not suited for suits and ties. Collar is too tight. Tie flops around. Jacket is stiff and restrictive… shoes are just plain wrong… So people in my church think I am “Less active” in the church and the reality of the situation is I get to the point where I need to leave and walk around.
So to answer your question? Yes.
REPORT ABUSEMy grandfather did that at the Seattle World’s Fair. LOL ADD does run in the family!
REPORT ABUSEWhat do you do for this company?
REPORT ABUSEGryffin,
I get that a lot at work as well. I am constantly being told “You aren’t much of a detail person”. yes I am. I pay attention to every last detail. I work hard at identifying details. I make lists of details. And when it comes time to put it down on paper, I always miss something. I get distracted, have to rush to catch up and something goes missing.
I don’t know what to say that will help, but I do feel your pain.
REPORT ABUSEReading out loud for me is virtually impossible. This may be due to Dyslexia or ADD or both. I have no idea, and I try to avoid it at all costs.
REPORT ABUSE -
AuthorPosts