[Evelyn]

Congratulations @dithl Having a stash at work is an excellent idea. Your tacking habits on to other activities sound like something I did last year, a study of sorts, called “tiny habits” set up by a guy whose last name was Fogg.

He had us tack 3 new single, quick habits to something we already do. One of mine was to turn on the shower when I went to the bathroom first thing in the morning to remind me to take my shower and get ready for my day before doing anything else, even if I didn’t actually take a shower that day. It worked very well.

I have the time-stealing habit of starting a project, or looking something up on the internet before I’m even awake in the morning.

I still have his info somewhere. if anyone is interested. I’m sure I posted it in the forum at some point before.

dithl good job. Med’s really can help if we let them; I’m finding out.

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[Evelyn]

I didn’t make it, I didn’t get through all my stuff.

I had to move from Michigan, the pressure of unpaid bills and less than unemployed, made it hard to let go of anything but when I am employed and the bills are paid I don’t have time — go figure.

I moved to Missouri, I’m glad I did. My brother checks on me a lot. But there is also more jobs here that I am qualified for. In Michigan there were a lot of people with my qualifications, and no employment gaps.

Here the employment gaps are okay because of the reason, taking care of family, a really tough job that I hope no one ever has to go through alone.

I have another positive, they keep stacking up, I have a family of deer that rests in my back yard once in a while. They go through every day morning and night, but sometimes they rest in the clearing just outside my kitchen window.

When I moved here the windows were all covered with dark tint to keep the sun out. I couldn’t stand it so I’ve started taking it off the windows, very difficult and sticky. It takes about an hour just to clean one 24″x 24″ window.

I need my sunshine!

The clearing is a slight uphill grade, and it looks a bit wild with all natural plant life, if anything was planted on purpose it doesn’t look it. The leaves are laying the winter mulch so bits of green are floating above the tan and brown bed of the clearing. I can understand why the deer would want to rest there it looks very relaxing.

It’s raining today, and I haven’t seen them so I’m wondering where they go when it’s wet out. We’ve had a good steady rain for the last 24 hours, a product of Hurricane Patricia, but folks around here are pleased to make her acquaintance; we really needed the rain. My brother said the ground was dry nearly 5 feet down. We have sand, clay and rock for soil. Not well suited for lush gardens without a lot of work.

Well I think my tangent is over my cat is picking at my shirt for attention, so I think I will pet her for a little while before I take my shower.

Keep strong my friends.
Evelyn

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[Evelyn]

Why not try a computer business. Start slow while you are still working then as you pick up start cutting your own hours.

Videos and podcasts are big, just start giving away content then as your audience grows monetize only the products you believe in.

What do you really like and can talk about for hours?

Do you know how to make phone Apps?

If you play video games talk about your favorite few, give tips on how to get to the next level, or ”3 things you should never do…”

I’m still learning about computers, I have a couple of websites but I think I need to be a little more consistent with my content. I also need to pick just one and give it my best attention.

I wrote this in the friends section first. Seems if you write in the Forum it will go to your timeline but if you write in the timeline it stays in the timeline.

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[Evelyn]

My browser is not working right. I clicked submit, when it didn’t go I remembered I wanted to be notified of replies so I checked the box then hit submit. I still took nearly forever, then I get this courtious little pink box that says ERROR: Duplicate reply detected; looks as though you’ve already said that!

Oops! Bad Browser!

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[Evelyn]

theOutlier, I love the line “Superman is invincible. I’m unconvincible”.

In other topics, I have a lot of things I used to like and some things I sort of like but nothing that get’s me excited enough to “commit” my imagination to. In the past I would create some success by having a committed imagination, where I couldn’t NOT do a thing, Passion is what it’s called in the neurotypical world, but for me I think it must be more. Maybe I’m wrong about that observation and just think I different but it seems right.

I had everything planned a few days ago and now I don’t even remember what it was all about.

this is so frustrating.

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[Evelyn]

I realize this is an old thread but I’d just like to say thank you it has been inspiring. Especially the morning brain, afternoon brain thing.

I cannot get motivated to do anything outside of my brain until after noon, unless I force myself. I get plenty confused though. I have been fighting to stay in the game for quite a while now, and I’m beginning to see positive results, not good at the maintenance part yet but still working on that. There has to be a time of day or some trigger that will make that part work better. If there is such a thing I’ll find it.

I’m 55 too. had a sign business that I kept nursing back to health every time I neglected it. Sometimes for months, sometimes for years. this last time it was about 8 years I had officially retired in 2007 when I went into truck driving, not a smart choice, but I had to try it. I know one thing that I don’t want to do for a company now! …besides work in a factory, deli, or fast-food. None of those are bad choices but they are a terrible way for me to make a living.

I have these moments of brilliance, but fail at the “doing” part of it. I am feeling the pinch of the ticking clock so I get frustrated with myself a lot easier. But what is also getting easier is forgiving myself. Understanding where I fail, and looking for ways to not fail.

I get comfortable in my head and I don’t want to leave it.

I have to say I like having a job though, it isn’t paying much but I know the money will be there in a couple of days. I like knowing that. So I am building on that feeling to pull myself out of the rut I keep treading or falling back into.

I’ve been trying to use writing as a way to make money for myself. That i where some of my flashes of brilliance turn up. When I’m passionate about a subject, and it lends itself to writing about it easily, I turn out some pretty good stuff. I suppose it’s like all writers they have to get primed up to do anything worth publishing.

I have 3 websites which are in desperate need of content that I haven’t been able to deliver beyond my flashes of inspiration. I have temporarily forgotten how to organize my thoughts, or I never knew and just realized it. Not sure which is accurate but I don’t do the work enough to keep up with understanding the process of making a website. So I have to learn it all over again just to get some copy out. That is getting very boring. It would be great to have someone to take care of that part, but I have to get something a little more promising before I can attract that kind of help.

Okay I don’t know where I’m going with this now so I’ll close for now.
Evelyn

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[Evelyn]

I could not take concerta, I just sat like a bump on a log, with my mind coming up with all kinds of stuff that I should and could be doing but didn’t have the ambition for. I did much better with low dose Ritalin.

I only take it when I know I’ll be in a situation where I have to be present mentally, because I can get involved in what I’m doing and hyper-focus. I need people to help me stay grounded, especially when I’m medicated.

A coach would help me learn to self-regulate, and that option is on my list of things to do as circumstances permit.

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[Evelyn]

Spring is my favorite time, I’m celebrating the day after the winter solstice. I know the days are getting longer even if it’s not noticeable ’til the middle of February.  I think it’s because the transformation is so drastic and exciting. You go from bleak dead looking sticks everywhere to vibrant glowing green that just feels full of life and promise. Even before the leaves come out you hear the peep frogs in boggy places, and thunder storms start up again, sound every day. the winter doesn’t have much sound. It’s best for sleeping… the bears have it right sleep the winter away.

I do like the colors and smells of autumn the ripe fruit and long keeping vegetables, harvest, honey, Mead, Beers and Wines all are starting then for the winter festivities, Thanksgiving and Christmas. Those hum drum days between New Year and Easter though best for sleeping.

Summer is good, it’s just a lot of work. It’s a good thing those days are made longer otherwise nothing would get done. The longer days make it easier to have fun even though you have to work most of the day. It’s just that there is also more work to do. I like the gardening part of it though. I have fair skin so I have to be careful in the midday sun. I do however enjoy being warm, better than being cold. Except where breathing is concerned I like breathing cool air. My skin likes warm air.

Okay I think I’ll do a little of that hibernating now.

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[Evelyn]

@blackdog

Rum will do that to you, even a little bit.

I started putting nuts in the blender when I couldn’t have dairy milk because I could make nut milks in place of it. It didn’t taste quite the same but it had the rich quality like milk and tasted good on cereals. Now I can’t have cereal either. Almonds tastes the closest to milk but I prefer Pecan and/or Walnut also you don’t have to soak them ahead of time, Almonds are much harder on your blender so it’s better to soak them. Brazil nuts and Hazelnuts are good too. Actually any nut can be made into milk using filtered or distilled water sea salt and the nuts of your choice. Sometimes you get cream instead of milk so you just add water til it’s right.

Once I made walnuts into cream and decided to make it into a desert dip for fruit. so I added real Maple syrup so it would be sweet. it was very good. and very rich.

Nut milks and creams keep about a week in the fridge similar to milk. Maybe one day I’ll culture the nut cream to see if I can make a nut sour cream for a vegi dip.

I haven’t managed to get the clutter cleared out yet either. I have it all piled in a couple rooms that I’m not living in. I managed to clean the place up enough to show the house but not much else. I went at a pretty good clip for a minute til I saw I was just moving the mess to a new location instead of really looking at what was in my hands and dealing with it.

I lost internet service for a little while. That really made a difference in my productivity, especially since I don’t have a TV either. But I can’t fool myself into thinking I don’t have internet service for the sake of getting things done, when know I do. Google is like a drug. I google everything. Even the name suggests addiction, ’cause it’s fun to say.

Okay that’s it for now.

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[Evelyn]

@blackdog

That is what I thought at first, but then it seemed like a challenge. The dishes have been sitting for three days and I’m eating organic soup with ground beef added for protein. So it’s kind of a trade-off. which inspired the line “Chasing after myself in some areas and pushing myself in others.”

My cats who are usually aloof have started bugging me for attention because I have barely paid any attention to them at all.

…I started this several hours ago, I actually thought I submitted it. Oh well, such is the life…

I am highly distracted today “more than usual” it’s Friday and it seems to confuse me more than any other day of the week, Monday is a close second though. The stress “to do”, and the stress of “haven’t done” those weekday tasks and projects is just higher.

I’ve started making smoothies including raw nuts like Walnuts, Pumpkin seeds, Pecans, and Almonds (after soaking) adding them to fruit and vegetable smoothies as a way to boost the protein; I could get used to this. I get a much fuller richer flavor than just using fruit or vegetables alone. I think I get more of the nutrition too.

Just finished one made with frozen Strawberries, Blueberries, Mango’s, ripe bananas, Walnuts, and pumpkin seeds. The taste was superb, don’t forget the salt though got to have some, even in the fruit.

Okay enough for now.

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[Evelyn]

@blackdog I posted a reply but I think it is on another page or on your… I don’t know where it is. I know I replied though. Anyway I am glad to see the thread. I thought I’d have a lot to say, maybe it’s too much I need some sleep too. been painting artwork on my walls. Wow am I out of practice! Or else I got lazy. I had the hardest time painting hills of grass so that they not only look like hills but also the right greens. I had some flat looking curve topped swaths of bright green for a little while. They still aren’t right but much better.

I might be moving to Missouri in the spring so I wanted to do all the artwork I had planned for so long before I went. I’m pretty proud of myself.

Good night, hope you are sleeping soundly.

 

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[Evelyn]

@Larynxa

Thanks for the Baldy man episode. I never saw it before either. Now I have to reread everything though but it was worth it.

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[Evelyn]

BTW I was diagnosed as a child, but that was ignored, my Dad said that no daughter of his was going to be put on speed. and that was the end of it. I didn’t even know. I always knew I was different, always on the sideline, the butt of jokes, suppressed and depressed. I could not keep friends.

I was overwhelmed by the feelings of comradery, and friendship the first time I was touched by a friend. She was laughing and put her hand on my shoulder then leaned in putting her head on top of her hand in laughter. I don’t even remember the joke, only that very warm joyful experience… I was 25!

I didn’t experience that again until I found this website and the people who understood what I was going through… I was 52!

I was in my early 40’s when I had had enough and thought something was wrong with me strong enough to seek help. I spent $1,000.00 to go to New York back in February of 2002, to see a doctor about Dyslexia and ADHD. I had a list of supplements and medications he recommended… That didn’t last long. I thought I was more crazy to listen to him than I was “disordered” .

Then finally in 2010, I was diagnosed again here, got the meds, but I still didn’t take it seriously until 2013, January. That was the darkest of the dark period I spoke of in the post above. I am doing better.

I still backslide, still offend people, though less often, still disorganized (at the mercy of my own devices), but it is all changing, improving, like I’m finally waking up.

I still love living in my head more than in reality, but I use a timer, (my oven timer) to pull me out about every 30, to 45 minutes. Just when I start to follow one of those sparkly trails, the timer goes off, and I take a reality break for about 10 min. then I set the timer again for about 30 to 45 minutes. It’s working!

There is a PBS program that is supposed to be coming back out this year called “ADD and loving it” I highly recommend that you and your daughter watch it either together or separately, doesn’t matter. It was the same equivalent to my life, as my oven timer is to my day. A sort of wake-up call, but fun! It brought me to this website.

God Bless PBS! And all the great people here at totallyADD. God Bless you too.

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[Evelyn]

All really good posts and answers to your question. These people saved my life after I found myself without a support system. I didn’t realize how much my family and my Mother in particular helped me until they weren’t there anymore.

I took on the roll as caregiver in their declining years. Such a valuable time.

The issues they helped me with daily seemed small seemed like just chit chat, but I later found out that they were my external regulators, because I couldn’t regulate myself. I used our conversations to try out ideas, get advice, and prioritize my actions. Without them I ran around like a chicken with my head cut off.

They didn’t know what their role was, and worse I didn’t know what their role was at the time. But they knew how smart and talented I was, and always told me I could do anything I put my mind to. Be anything I wanted to be. That didn’t seem helpful, so open ended. Had they known what their role was I think it would have been more helpful. They might have known what I was best at and helped me find my path to get there. At the very least they could have helped me see where my strengths were and guide me into using those to come up with solutions to implement structure in a way that made sense to me.

It is so good that you are checking out this website, you will see bits and pieces of your daughter in every story, video and chat. Encourage her to look through this website too. It might take her a while, it was six months to a year before I took this stuff seriously. I was in denial “Big Time” but the loss of my support system gave me no alternative. I was losing everything I had, on top of losing them.

To say that she needs you is an understatement, if she has half the issues I had, and still have, her sanity depends on you.

I am going to parrot the advice already given, but with a twist, watch the little victories she has, notice where she does well, (actually I think someone else did say this, sorta), and try to see her process, even if you are part of her process. then help her to see her own process. She won’t jump right in with recognition and take over her own life but she will begin to see how she can accomplish things more often, stay on track more, and possibly be overwhelmed for shorter and shorter lengths of time.

I spent days and weeks in overwhelm, the whole year after my step dad passed away, the very last of my support system, I was overwhelmed 90% of the time. Lucky for me I found this website in the darkest part of that year. Slowly, I started having moments of clarity, this year I finally found the motivation to take care of myself. I held a job, paid my own bills, felt real confidence for the first time in my life.

With your guidance, and foresight, she may get through to her own self confidence easier that I did. And the lovely thing is, is that you are still here to celebrate the discovery with her. I get giddy when I think about my Mom smiling with pride because she always knew I could do it. My Dad would just lean back in his chair, throw one leg over the arm an put one hand lazily on the back of his head and smile a sheepish, more like a “knowing” grin.

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[Evelyn]

What was the question?

 

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[Author]

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