[Bibliophile]

Once again, ADHD describes symptoms not cause or degree of impairment.

For example, dogged determination would never make sense to me as an ADHD trait unless it is meant to convey perseveration, i.e. the inability to stop doing a task even when it is logicial or beneficial to do so. This includes those times that one should walk away from something as it is complete, but is unable to do so. The impulsivity of the condition never allows me to stay on something for very long once the “hyperfocus” has worn off. If this is a skill someone has that they can turn on like a switch, I fail to see how I can be considered in the same disorder as them.

I don’t see how being stubborn is an ADHD trait? Does it derive from having to develop coping strategies to compensate for the deficits that leads to a reluctance to change a mindset? It would go against the mutable nature implied by impuslivity. I don’t think it can be attributed to lack of attention or restlessness/hyperactivity. Is it just a personality trait?

I am very good at coming up with a meal from things I find the fridge. Is this creativity? It might be labelled as such given that many culinary endeavours are, but I know that the skill was developed by a desire to eat, not having someone to cook for me since an early age, and a lack of variety of items. We adapt and our coping strategies become our strengths. Other traits are simply that, personal traits, e.g. high IQ, swimming ability, throwing a ball fast with accuracy, etc.

What is important is that you all have found something positive that strengthens your self esteem. I fail to see the value of lumping it in with the mess of ADHD.

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[Bibliophile]

I can’t claim to have any super powers related to ADHD unless you would consider the following gifts:

• a very short fuse;
• difficulty with listening to others due to impatience;
• the inability to complete tasks;
• providing insufficient thoroughness on tasks that have to take in myriads of variables or over a long period of time;
• providing too much extraneous information on topics only tangentially related to the topic;
• constant restlessness; and
• difficulty deciding on something when multiple variables must be considered.

I could go on.

Look, I am glad that you are smart have a high IQ, but those attributes are not related to your ADHD. They are your own personal gifts.

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[Bibliophile]

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[Bibliophile]

I was pleasantly surprised with the article. It was much more honest than a lot of the spin I see on ADHD tauting it as a gift. The fact that Howie said the following brings to light how many of us feel:

My wife and children have been through therapy because of the problems my disorders have caused.

When our children were young, it was hard for them to corner me and to share their day. One of the great pleasures of having children is spending one-on-one time with them. Sadly, I could do that for only a few minutes at a time.

I’d never say that ADD/ADHD is a gift or a blessing. And if someone says it is a gift, I’d love to return it.

His comments on adaptation through job selection and the lack of impulse control also resonate.

Thanks for sharing, Bill.

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[Bibliophile]

@browneyes With DSM IV, the term ADD was replaced with ADHD. There are three diagnostic types of ADHD: ADHD, Combined Type; ADHD Predominantly Inattentive; and ADHD, Predominantly Hyperactive-Impulsive Type. Some clinicians have argued that the difference is primarily a question of the severity of the impairment.

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[Bibliophile]

I found this description of the show:

Are ADHD medications putting your children in danger? Anderson tackles the controversial issue of medicating children for attention deficit disorder. In a heated debate, two moms face off on the appropriate ways to treat children with ADHD. What’s right for your kids?

Why is it a debate between moms? Are they really that qualified to comment on medication? Seems as pointless as having mom’s debate just about any topic of a medical nature, e.g. two moms will discuss whether you should let your aging father with a hearing problem have a hearing aid?

The popular media makes me sad sometimes.

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[Bibliophile]

I didn’t mean to detract from what you perceive as positive, just to impart my own interpretation of my symptoms’ effects. I think too often we associate our personality traits or skills/gifts as stemming from the symptoms, when they may be separate, as you indicated once above, Tiddler, or originate with the coping mechanism.

What I got from your statements is that you have found ways to work within your skill sets and abilities that allow the ADHD symptoms to be minimized or in some cases beneficial.

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[Bibliophile]

@JimC

So many of those are generalizations or could be applied to non-ADHD people as well. Some make no sense at all. For example, we are in no way “STABLE,” quite the antithesis actually.

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[Bibliophile]

I agree with you, Tiddler. I see little positive coming out of the ADHD symptoms.

The impulsivity, especially the emotional impulsivity has cost me friends and jobs over the years.

The inability to self motivate for any sustained period of time (or once the hyperfocus has departed) means that rarely is any skill mastered or anything completed. I am not good at networking because I cannot sustain the interest or motivation. The exception is video games as I only play for set time periods, they remember where I was, and I can take months or years to complete it with no penalty.

The fidgety/restlessness is fairly neutral. I just get up a lot. To compensate, I have become very good at chunking and prioritizing items. This doesn’t mean that I work better than others, just I have to go about it in a more regimented fashion and account for the wasted time.

Hyperfocusing or perseveration, call it whatever you want, is great when it is on something I am supposed to be doing. The problem is that I have little control. I often get fixated on something, not in a ritual way like OCD. I just can’t break away from a tangent. This can last for seconds or be reoccurring over days. When it pairs with my impulsivity, it results in fixation on purchasing an item that I may rationally know is not a good investment or wasting time, including something irrelevant in a report that serves no purpose, etc.

I do work fast, but I don’t think this is a symptom as much as a compensation for a deficit. My attention span is like an hourglass, with a set amount of sand. Knowing this, I work very, very fast to compensate as the task will not be completed if the hourglass runs out of sand before I am finished. Also, I try and complete tasks right away as I know anything pushed to the horizon will either be forgotten or never completed.

I do not buy in to the increase in “creativity” that others espouse about their ADHD. Sure, I think thoughts quickly, blurt them out, love to solve problems, but I cannot compare what is going on in my head with that of another given they may be thinking just as fast, but not expressing it like I feel compelled to do. I am not artistic. I have a good ear for music, but have never been able to master a musical instrument, having tried with different instruments repeatedly over the years. I am great a jerry-rigging IT solutions, but I am not sure I classify that as creative, more good at solving a problem with a quick solution that may not be the best in the long-term.

I am not trying to wallow or blame the ADHD. It is who I am after all. I just wanted to point out that the downside of the symptoms outweighs the odd positive and that the latter are often compensation skills and not the symptoms itself. I was diagnosed very young so this is not a new world for me. This is something I have consciously been fighting against for many years. I know that Ned Hallowell has said that he wouldn’t give it up if given the choice, but I am pretty sure that I would as I think it would improve my quality of life. Treatment has helped. Writing about it is cathartic as long as I don’t wallow in self pity.

The point is to stay positive about your life, even with ADHD. Recognize that your path will be different and keep going forward as best we can.

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[Bibliophile]

The webpage comes off as a tirade against medication. Comparing methylphenidate and other stimulants to cocaine is a hyperbole. I am already on a restricted diet and the only factor that I have found that can make my ADHD symptoms worse is low blood sugar.

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[Bibliophile]

@Sugar_Shane

Dr. Ned Hallowell states very clearly that his kids have benefited tremendously from medication. See for yourself at 16:00 of this YouTube interview with him at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dtU7wGn5PAE

Drugs are not the only solution, but they can be an effective tool that allows us to refine our coping mechanisms appropriately.

I have been on both methylphenidate and amphetamine salts. The latter has been better. Is it a cure-all. NO. I would argue that I don’t even need it all the time if I am having an easy day. The symptoms are worse without it though.

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[Bibliophile]

Some thoughts on what has worked:

For self esteem building, work with him on tasks not for him. Trying to relate the activity to something he likes is important too.

Try to enable him as much as possible to do the work on his own, but do not expect it to be completed or be dismayed by his need of help.

At that young an age, organization and structure are what is most needed to get things done on time. Planners might help, but he is probably too young.

Do not expect any reward system to work if it takes too long to get gratification nor expect to be able to remove the positive reinforcement as motivation will be lost.

As others have mentioned, do not rule out medication as it might be a crutch that will allow other interventions/accommodations to be more effective and empower him to be more self-reliant.

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[Bibliophile]

What you describe is all well and good, TooFat, but what about the nitty gritty of getting ahead or just surviving, e.g. passing in school.

• How did you help them overcome the continual failures at school, sports etc.?
• How did you help them cope with the inability to master a musical instrument because they cannot practice the same thing over and over again, including playing songs, not just scales? or at sports because they did not have the drive to practice drills to the same extent as others with the same innate abilities?
• How did you help your kids cope with rejection from others due to their inattentiveness or emotional impulsivity?
• How did you help them control their impulsivity, both action-oriented and emotional?

Did you just let those go? Did you just say, “that is not your gift”? If so, how does that help them achieve any modicum of success if things are just shrugged off and they are told those are things for linears, not you. you are special. Special at what?

What if everything is hard for them? Not everyone with ADHD is artistic and there is little empirical evidence to support the claim that we have on average higher IQs. We as parents cannot just sit back and watch them get thrown out of school, get rejected by others, fail to pursue anything for any length of time, etc. and say that it is a learning experience for them.

Life stories and positive attitudes do not fix biological problems.

What is necessary is:

• Getting them tutors;
• Ensuring routine
• Being loving and supportive
• Making sure all learning disabilities are being evaluated and accommodated
• Treating the ADHD medically if necessary
• Working with them and in some cases working hard to make sure they complete tasks is necessary.

There must be accommodation, both at home, and at every point of contact for moderate to severe ADHD people to succeed. You could argue that success is in the mind, but what is meant by success in this case is:

• happiness,
• the ability to do what they want,
• enough income to support themselves and their interests, and
• the ability to interact with others, both linears and ADHD people, in meaningful and rewarding ways.

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[Bibliophile]

Another good link. I am not sure that I agree that Cognitive Behavioural Therapy is appropriate for kids with ADHD as they are not likely to complete tasks, work well in a group setting, or follow-through with a long-term treatment. I do like his tip about finding an area that your child excels at to boost esteem. We are trying to do that and have found a modicum of success. The problem does arise though that your child is unlikely to be the best in any area so mitigating blows to the ego must be addressed as well. He explained the use of meds rather well, IMO.

On another note, I liked his bow tie.

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[Bibliophile]

@Sherri27

Perceiving letters or numbers as colours is called Grapheme–Color Synesthesia. Wikipedia has a page on it: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Grapheme-color_synesthesia

I don’t think it is related to ADHD, but another one of your quirks.

@Munchkin

I am the opposite. I have problems dealing with numbers if they are written as words. I need to see the mathematical expression to understand a concept in a lot of cases.

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