GAMES! Goals?

[Anonymous]

My husband and I agreed to stay off the computer this morning (we both slept in late, so we had cereal for lunch), and then I asked if we could spend just ONE hour dealing with paperwork clutter ONLY. And that we were only allowed to handle the piece of paper once.

Now I have this heavy recycling box to take outside. I KNEW we had some hidden treasures (like the coffee club card my husband accused me of losing – it was in his pile). I also had a lot of useless paperwork for those really great ideas of mine that never got any further than initial planning. So INTO THE RECYCLE BIN they went!

Somehow I feel like I just lost a few pounds of mental weight. Damn those dust bunnies that were under the paper though! 👿

REPORT ABUSE

[Carrie]

Memzak – Yeah depression sucks. I only get it with my PMDD. I just want to stay in bed and cry and sleep forever. I hate being a chauffeur, mind you perhaps not for my own child. Just with my sister, who was slow getting her drivers license and guilts me into things. But these days I now say nope, figure it out for yourself!

Also… (side track here too, but I really need to vent before I kill somone) her and my dad got into a spat and he kicked her out so she called me balling asking to live with me! ARRRRRRRRRRRG!! Its not like I could say no, she has no where else to go and shes fecking 23 years old!! COME ON GROW UP! Gosh shes already on my nerves! My husband and I stay in bed Saturday and Sunday mornings if we can until lunch and every 5 mins starting at 8am *knock knock* can I come down? Yeah can I borrow your bike? and blah blah blah blah blah blah blah! So I tell her “Please DONT come down here! I DONT CARE if you knock LEAVE ME ALONE! USE MY BIKE WHENEVER YOU WANT!” she bugs us for the most useless things, for NO REASON at all! I dont care if we aren’t “getting busy” and we are just laying there talking (all we do) I DONT want to be interrupted with stupid crap she can talk to me about after! SO I told her IF YOU MUST talk to me TEXT ME DONT COME TO MY ROOM! NO IFS ANDS OR BUTS! So this morning what does she do, walks right down to my room without even knocking! That and shes always in my space. I turn around and BAM run right into her shes right there and asking me dumb questions… ‘uh so what time did you say you could give me a ride?” Ive only told her ONE MILLION TIMES!!! I KNOW she knows the answer she just still asks. I told her, just stay AWAY from my room, and STAY ARMS length away from me and my husband (she crowds him and annoys him too) and I will be okay with her staying with us for a little while. No more than a week! I like my space and my own personal time. Is that so much to ask in my own home? I think having spare rooms is a curse! Since I have them everyone thinks they can just live in them! My parents have extra company “Oh yeah Carrie has 3 extra rooms” NOOOOOOOOOOOO! /end-rant

Sugar – I hate when I lounge around all day too, but im trying to give myself some days and not feel bad about it. Today is such a beautiful day! My husband said hes going to get the boat and maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan I want to go out on the lake too but I have to work!! ((((((((((((((( The only time I hate afternoon shift is when its gorgeous and my husbands day off too!

Im off to do the dishes now and fold ONE basket of laundry, take a shower and get ready for work! Thank goodness weekends are slow and the CA im working with actually works! I dont have to pick up her slack! Wooo!

REPORT ABUSE

[Anonymous]

Well done, No_Dopamine!! That’s how I felt after ditching all the piles of paper from my sewing room. Now I just have to work out how to file what’s left 🙄

Carrie – I feel so sorry for you!! My brother in law visits from interstate every year or so, and while he doesn’t stay with us, we are expected to spent loads of our valuable time with him and his kids. It’s exhausting!! And the kids are cute in small doses but irritating by the time we’ve spent a good chunk of a week with them. Even my patient son, who usually has all the time in the world for young ones, gets irritated by his cousins after a few days. We can look forward to it all again next January, when they are due to visit again…… 😯

I have come to a dead halt! My kids have gone back to school so I no longer have my cheer squad to help motivate me Not that you girls aren’t great at helping, but it’s just not the same as having my daughter saying “can I help, Mum?”, or my son saying “that looks great. I love you Mum”. Plus I am losing sleep because I can’t sleep in when I have to get up to take my daughter to school, so I start the day feeling tired and foggy.

Hmmm….anyone else want to join my pity party?!? I think I just need to get my butt into gear and try to tap into whatever kept me going last week, and get out of my slump. Okay….I will set some goals.

I MUST fix two penguin costumes so I can get them out of my house – rehearsal is tonight so I can dump them off then, if I finish them today.

On the way to picking up my daughter, I will get petrol in the car, and I will go to the bank and put more money on my credit card. It’s very sick 😳

I will hang at least five of the photos that I have been meaning to hang for years. I bought some hooks yesterday, so that’s a start.

I will pack up some of my daughter’s best cast off toys and put them aside to give to a friend I will see tonight, as her niece has two young girls and not much money, and they will love some almost new toys.

I will reward myself with some TV time, but I will unpick a pair of pants while I do so, as they need to be altered to fit my son.

There. Done. Now I have to make an effort. But gees it’s going to be a hard slog today

REPORT ABUSE

[memzak]

Carrie, is you sister ADD as well? Last year my sister told me that at my age (just turned 59) I should have my life together. I feel its is less together now then ever. Part of me wants to give up and just retire from life and sit and do needlepoint forever and watch movies and part of me, very weak part of me today at least, is saying how satisfying it has been helping some friends have a lawyer to help them with their legal problems.

REPORT ABUSE

[Anonymous]

I’m going to try and find out where my 401k is. Right now it’s in limbo.

REPORT ABUSE

[Anonymous]

Spacely – happy looking! Hope you find it.

Memzak – I hear you on the giving up and retiring from life. It would be really nice to not be accountable to anyone for things, and to just do what pleases me, but there is always this impulsive demon inside me who shouts “I’ll do it!!” just for the immediate reward of seeing the pleasure on a person’s face when they can palm off something difficult or time consuming. Then I spend ages regretting it, as the task plays on my mind over and over, until I eventually stress myself into a mess by doing the last minute rush to finish it. I then vow never to do something like that again, but I always do! I must admit that it can be very satisfying to do these sort of things, overall, but I always take on that little bit too much, always leave it till it’s nearly too late, and it’s incomplete state stresses me out until it’s done. I just wish I could motivate myself to start these things earlier, or not take on so much.

I am partway through my list. I have mended the penguin costumes, hung the photos, and packed up the toys. Now I am having lunch.

I feel like a bit of a fraud though. I am picking jobs that I know I am likely to do. I have steered clear of cleaning the shower, mopping floors, tidying the laundry cupboard, and going through our over-full filing cabinet to chuck out what’s not needed anymore. I guess starting with the easy things will help me get into habits, so that I can progress onto the harder stuff eventually. Maybe I’ll add sorting through a file or two to my list over the next couple of days.

REPORT ABUSE

[Anonymous]

Thanks KrazyKat. :

REPORT ABUSE

[Carrie]

Mem – I hear you about the having your life together. I Just feel like I cant get it together. My front yard is all weeds. Some literally as tall as my house! Im still drowning in laundry. Those are my biggest downfalls. Then I have my poor kids who cant ride bikes without training wheels cause mommy is too afraid to go outside in case she runs into someone she knows. I just feel so overwhelmed with trying to figure out how to weed (I didnt even know that you had to water grass), I am embarrassed that I let it get so bad, once again, im scared to go outside in case someone I know sees me! Then my laundry, and my poor kids! Then I just shut down. Once again makes me feel worse knowing Ive been up for hours and could have had it all done long time ago. Vicious circle it is!

Spacely – If you find it, can I have some? hahaha

Krazy kat – I would like to join the pity party! But only for tonight! I too kinda cheated! Did the same thing. Things I knew I could get done (or sucker my husband into helping me hahahaha)

I need to figure out something.. A routine or something to get change out of this. When I went into mental health, the man there gave me a package of a course they run that deals with goals and how to do them quite detailed. Its targeted at those with depression since there is nothing around here for ADD, but I think it will still be good. Perhaps I will find that and try it out. Though time and time again I never stick to it. I need someone right there with a whip 24/7. *sigh* I just wish there was a simple black and white formula to life! Would make it so much easier!

REPORT ABUSE

[Carrie]

Oh. And no my sister isnt ADD. You should see her room. Spotless! She is very organized, focused and soooooooo not a scatter brain like me.

Good news!!!!! The Prozac is working… Well so far. Yesterday and the day before had some pretty bad mood swings. Today I am feeling great, no mood swings at all! I took my Dexedrine and Prozac as soon as I got this morning. I feel calm, quiet, relaxed, and I could actually say happy! I dont think I have felt happy in a long time! NO MOOD SWINGS! I asked my husband just to make sure if I was really having mood swings for the last couple days and he said “OH YEAH! REALLY bad!” Today NONE! And during PMS when they start they normally dont stop and get worse until the day of my period! Woohoo! I just hope this lasts!

Of to fold 2 loads of laundry since I didnt do any yesterday. I need to find that little book thing that guy gave me from mental heatlh.

Oh and I just remembered another thing that happened this morning! My sister wanted to show me something on the PC. So I was standing there, I started to feel inpatient like I normally do… But I was able to redirect myself and be patient and finish listening to her. Normally, and what I wanted to do but didnt, is say “hurry up, get to the point! Hurry! Whats your point???” But I didnt. I stood there calm, without that constant itch nagging at me! Woo!

REPORT ABUSE

[Anonymous]

@Carrie: I do that all the time. My wife says it’s the dagger face. I often need to leave the room if she, or any other muddle is trying to work something out. I need to stop doing that, but it’s soooooo frustrating. Hoping to get cleared for meds soon and hope it will help.

OH–muddles, I forgot to post this to the making up words thread. I was talking to my wife about Harry Potter and meant to say muggles, but said “muddles.” I’m now using that to describe non-ADDers. I realize it may be backwards, but their world is so screwed up with TPS reports, objective setting, individual development plans, zoning approvals, assembly instructions, warning labels….[PRIMAL SCREAM]. They’re the ones who are muddled. Our world would be so much less bureaucratic.

REPORT ABUSE

[Carrie]

I hear you about the whole leaving the room. Reminds me of school or even our staff meetings. It seems to take people forever to understand when I have understood way from the beginning, so I just sit there while everyone else is confused, waiting and waiting and waiting! UGH! who has time for that! In staff meetings, once again, I understand the solution right away yet everyone is still yipping on and on about the same thing, drives me crazy! I have better things to do then sit around and wait for them to sort themselves!

REPORT ABUSE

[Anonymous]

That’s the funny thing about ADHD: we get to the solution so much quicker. It’s what makes it easy to see this as a “gift.” Until, of course, you misplace a decimal point or crash the server with a typo.

I have a similar problem with jumping to the end of a conversation without the pleasantries. My wife is building her business and she has these great ideas. I tend to listen and then go, “yeah, but a per person fee won’t work. You need a flat fee and then…” [Stares at me]. “What?!?” “Sorry, those are all wonderful ideas, and I’m very proud of you.”

Same thing when I say “where are you going,” instead of, “You like nice. I like that dress on you, and I noticed that you did your hair and makeup. You are clearly not staying in the house today. Could I ask, lovely wife of mine, where are you going?”

That beginning stuff is all understood. I just said it in my head.

REPORT ABUSE

[Anonymous]

Pete-puma, depends on the type of ADHD. I am very indecisive and will get lost in thought trying to think of all the combinations of results an action can have. I’ll think of a few things…vary back and forth..space out and then forget what I was weighing.. rinse and repeat. I’m useful if one is curious about all the various options to solve a problem or if one is curious about contemplation of why the problem exists.

I’m better on the meds because I’m having more thought organization, less cognitive useless noise, and not forgetting my original thoughts as much. still don’t want me as your stock broker or ER trauma surgeon.

REPORT ABUSE

[Anonymous]

SG – Even being indecisive can get to the source of a problem, because you don’t get bogged down in the black and white of things. I find that while I am indecisive a lot of the time, the same “think of every possible solution” mentality means I can then try every one in order to find the correct one. Like when a machine at work isn’t working – many staff think about what went wrong last time and constantly try to correct for that error, without thinking of other things that might be wrong. I am like you in that I can brainstorm all sorts of possible solutions but have trouble deciding on a final one, though in an emergency I seem to have a pretty good feel for what is the right thing to do, without vacillating over what I should do – I only get myself in a muddle when I have the luxury of time to think about things!!

Pete – I do the same as you. Hubby always gets annoyed because I immediately point to all the problems with something, or jump to the end of the conversation without hearing it all. He either calls me a pessimist, or says I rain on his parade just to irritate him and stir the pot, or that I disagree just for the sake of disagreeing. I don’t think I do, but I do find that optimists like him can be annoying – in my mind, there are certain realities that should be prepared for, just in case they happen, otherwise something good can turn into something bad. It’s not pessimism, just forward planning!

REPORT ABUSE

[Anonymous]

Well, I had an unplanned “do nothing” day today. A friend asked me to pop by, as she was feeling crappy and wanted someone to help keep her mind off things. Got home at lunch time, ate lunch, then was about to go out to do some shopping when I saw some paperwork I needed to deal with. Got one lot ready to post, so I could post it while out. Made a phone call about another letter, and am now waiting for a call back. Hmmmm. I get all antsy when I am waiting for a return call. I can’t get into doing anything. I pace. I fidget. I HATE IT!! So I am here, killing time while I wait. Betcha he calls back the moment my butt hits the toilet seat, after I have waited till I am bursting to go!!

REPORT ABUSE

[Author]

Posts