[ellamama]

I did the FranklinCovey training years ago. Holy smokes! I think it was nearly 20 yrs. ago! I loved it. It was super, BUT wouldn’t work for me today. Now I need to let a lot of other folks have access to my schedule to see if I’m free for meetings and stuff, so I’m stuck with Outlook, but it doesn’t do squat for planning what I (should be) doing. As I see it, FranklinCovey was great for planning and task management; Outlooks for scheduling meetings, etc. I particularly liked the FranklinCovey “journal” feature to jot down notes.

If I were alone on a desert island, I’d use FranklinCovey. As part of a big organization (not including my family!) I’m in Outlook.

Meanwhile, I’m really curious what others have come up with.

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[ellamama]

@Deucedog: You’re not alone. You can give people information; you can make them think. These issues are hard and dealing with parents–especially elderly parents–is even harder. At times like these, I recall a phrase which I’m told is from AA: “Keep what you like and leave the rest.”

As for whether you should hate or love your mother, can you do both? (And, yes, I do. Sadly, I suspect if my kids are honest, one day they’ll do the same…they’re human.)

Peace,

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[ellamama]

Thanks, Dr. J. for checking your sources. Interestingly (at least to me…) there’s an Rx omega 3 supplement (at least in the US) manufactured under the name Lovaza (http://www.lovaza.com/). It’s approved to reduce blood triglycerides, but is apparently being used “off lable” for ADD as well as to augment mood stabelizers.

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[ellamama]

Here’s the “official” information from the Remifemin website: http://www.remifemin.com/Products/Menopause/07500-Remifemin.aspx According to information from my midwife (who’s a CNM and professor in the department of OB/GYN at the University of Maryland) the ingredient, black cohosh, has been used for years and years to treat various “female disorders”. (N.B: black cohosh and blue cohosh are VERY different.) It’s unlike soy-based supplements in that it’s not a phytoestrogen; it’s not estrogenic. According to a friend who’s a German pharmacobotanist, herbal supplements which pass some German screening/testing process (which Remifemin has) is extremely rigourous. This means that when the label says the product has 20 mg. of black cohosh root and rhzome, it contains just that–no more, no less and that’s the part of the plant. This is unlike what you may get from a vitamin shop which sells generic “black cohosh”. According to my psychatrist/neuropharmacologist, she says “it’s good stuff”. I swear, I’m not a schill! It just seems to be a useful product.

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[ellamama]

@lvriniel: I agree this is a great book (I posted about it a while back). Ironically, I haven’t finished it…it’s in a pile somewhere…When I talk to Sarah’s mom, I’ll be certain to recommend it. She has two other, younger kids, both of whom have LDs (I don’t know if there’s ADHD with them, too).

Where we live, the public schools are worse than bad. As a result, anybody of any means sends their kids to private schools. The schools end up being segregated by learning style/need. There’re fabulous schools for kids with dyslexia; great schools for smart “neurotypical” kids, and so on…While it’s nice that kids (with means) can attend schools which supposedly meet specific learning styles, it’s strange. I can’t help but imagine the mess when these kids graduate from these schools where they’ve only been with their “own kind” and land in the “real world” where there’re lots of different sorts of minds.

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[ellamama]

+1 This would be REALLY useful!

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[ellamama]

Welcome to our “club”. I was diagnosed with the LD dyscalcuia in 1979 when I was a young teen. I always wanted to be a pediatrician, so in college I took pre-med courses which included a year of inorganic chemistry. The first time I took it I got a D. I took it again in summer school and got a C. After college (I went from college to a graduate program in public health) I took inorganic chemistry for a 3rd time and got a B.

What’s my point? Well, I’ve two: (1) ADD often is associated with a learning disability. Perhaps that’s an issue for you, too. and (2) here’s some unsolicited advice: don’t spend too long fretting over what could have been. Move on.

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[ellamama]

Your post sounds familar. At age 34, I started on 4 cycles of IVF with LOADS of hormones–including shutting down my system once in a while to “reboot”. At age 38–after birthing two wonderful daughters–I let my system settle down. Now, at age 45 it seems that having produced ~100 eggs than otherwise would have occurred, menopause may be coming sooner than expected. (No, my doctor hasn’t confirmed my suspicion, but I find it hard to imagine that cracking out that many eggs helped…)

At the suggestion of my psychopharmacologist (psychatrist who primarially prescribed and monitors medications), I’ve been taking Remifemin–a brand of black cohosh supplement. While there are a number of black cohosh supplements available (at least in the US) Remifemin is unique in that the dosage is standardized and approved for use in Germany (where herbal supplements are carefully regulated). I don’t mean to push a specific brand, but mention it to explain why that brand may be unique.

I have to admit, I was pretty surprized that I noticed an effect–less fatigue WAY less irritable.

HTH!

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[ellamama]

I left for a family vacation–without our dog! My husband was at work; our daughter was at day care. I was home with our dog and supposed to pack up the car (dog included) then pick up my daughter at day care, husband at work and then head off to our cabin in Maine for 2 weeks.

Our dog–a very energetic, long-haired daschund/German Shephard mix–was a “foundling”. As such, she was always very anxious when folks were packing up the car and would always hanging around by the front door to make sure she wasn’t left behind. Nevertheless, I managed to load up the station wagon sans pooch.

It wasn’t until I pulled into the day care center’s parking lot and started to lower the windows to keep the car from getting too hot for the dog that I realized: THE DOG!!!

I raced back home and opened the front door to be greeted by my poor dog who was–by this time–completely *frantic* with separation anxiety. Poor girl…

I loaded her up; managed to remember to pick up my daughter and showed up to get my husband whereupon I had to explain *again* why I was late *again*.

Thankfully, the remainder of the trip was without incident. (Our dog died this past summer (at age 16) and I still wonder if she ever forgave me…)

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[ellamama]

I agree with Rick with the “acknowledgement” idea. I think–particularly when on the phone and there’re no non-visual means to communicate–that sort of narrating what you’re doing can help. That could take the form of recognizing you’re talking too much and then trying to turn the focus back to them. Another thing which I do sometimes is to explain–at least in part–why I may be so chatty, “I’m sorry if I’m talking too much. As a telecommuter I work on my own. Sometimes I’m so eager to talk with other folks that sometimes I get overexuberant.”

@Rick: Re: your assessment that what I called “blunt”, you called “honest”. I laughed because it reminded me of the whole male vs. female communications style issue. I wonder if it was a man who’d told me what she did if I’d have described it as honest. (Either way, I don’t see “blunt” as an inherently negative concept.)

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[ellamama]

DBTC *snicker*. I could add a Myers-Briggs Personality Type, too!

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[ellamama]

I’m enjoying this string. Fred’s comment reminded me of when I had a psycho-ed reevaluation as an adult. I’d been evaluated ~age 13 and was found to have dyscalculia, an LD. In my 20’s I was applying to graduate programs and in order to get extended time for standardized tests, I need a recent evaluation, so I was reevaluated. At the appointment where we reviewed the findings, the evaluator told me, “You’re GTLD”. I thought for a moment, then replied, “Greater than learning disabled?”

Now I’m wondering if you’ve got multiple diagnoses, which goes first? ADDGTLD? LDGTADD? LDADDGT? Can I add my degrees? GTLDADDPhDMPH? Or MPHPhDADDLDGTADD?

Jeez! Talk about alphabet soup!

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[ellamama]

I couldn’t agree more with Saffron’s comment and hope Dr. J will weigh in *yoo hoo!* I’m among those who appreciate the antidepressant benefit of Prozac, but am challenged by the inertia which can seep in. I don’t know if Celexa is similar to Prozac in that regard. I found Provigil helpful as a stimulant, but it’s not very long acting. Concerta provides me significant improvement with a longer duration. Provigil is more expensive but it’s easier to get (at least in the US). Getting the monthly Rx for Concerta gets rather tedious–especially if I’m traveling and need to get a new Rx.

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[ellamama]

Thanks, wolfshades and ADDled. Reading your responses has made me think through some of my challanges. Among them is balancing my silly, playful self with (supposedly) being in authority. It works fine with some, but I’ve had some others who’ve greeted my apparently casualness with the idea that I’m incompetent (did I spell that right?). I suppose in most instances I need to just be able to tell folks, “I need you to do X.” and not explain “because if I tried to do it the client would have to wait 3 months” or “if I did it, this simple table would have errors”, etc.

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[ellamama]

I, too, have had trouble finding help with parenting with ADD. When I’ve looked on line, I find loads of references on parenting kids with ADD, but not parenting with ADD. What’s worse is that my younger daughter is showing signs of ADD. I know what she needs (structure, consistancy, etc.) but this is a big enough trouble for me dealing with myself–now I’ve got to help her too!

So far, I’m trying to focus on my daughter loving herself. (I tell myself that as I drop her off at school late…)

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