The High-Five Corner

[quizzical]

@carrie: I hear you about the dropping by the school thing. I’ve tried volunteering here and there but I also find it tough to talk to the other moms most of the time; I always feel like I’m on some other wavelength, and they can sense it. Probably just my imagination, but wherever it’s coming from, it gets in the way!

The other thing that bugs me is that the other parents are often so busy chatting that they don’t seem to be focusing on the kids. As in, hello, why are we all here in the first place?

The school bus stop is easier, though, because there are just two or three other parents there, and about ten kids. So I’m starting small!

@powcat: High five on getting ready for university! Good luck!

Right now I’m working on getting my household chores on some kind of regular schedule. Right now I can’t tell if this is a Huge Step Forward or Just One More List/System that will be abandoned – that’s a whole separate vent. I suppose actually doing any household chores is progress! But so far, so good – the bathrooms are all shiny! Oooh, shiny!

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[Anonymous]

Hi Carrie, Glad you are ok. I am still riding low. Can’t think of anything to high five at. Had a terrible aniexty attack Wed nite. Had to call ambulance, could not breath. this only happened to me once before in my life. Did call Dr and had Effexor upped and a scrip for some anti=aniety drug are waiting for me. I feel like a pill popper and I am only 55. High fives to you guys though…

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[powcat]

thanks guys for cheering me on! my boyfriend (of a few months) and I broke up yesterday and now I have no plans for the remainder of the weekend. and though I feel kind of sad and empty, I’m actually relieved to have this time and quiet to clean and tidy my apartment before school starts back up, a long-time project that never seems to move forward more than a few inches at a time (I still have boxes of books unpacked from when I moved here in December.) contacted some girlfriends. cooked a big meal today (motivated to eat whole and healthy, at least for now). ON TOP OF THE DISHES, which is huge. my boyfriend, yesterday morning, washed all my dishes yesterday morning to help me out…. I will miss that part.

the thing that’s been working for me: every time I need a dish and it’s not clean, I wash that dish, plus 3 more from the sink. or 5 more, or 10 more, depending on how much time I think I can spare. but 3 dishes actually takes very little time, guys! and it adds up, if you wash more dishes than you use. also, my new rule is, if it just needs to be rinsed, I rinse it out right away – saves space in the sink, saves hassle.

the whiteboard I hung up in the kitchen is working well too. now my to-do list (not my grand to-do, just the most immediate stuff) is right there in front of me. I cross stuff out as it gets done and I don’t actually erase it until I make a list for the next day. that way I see that I got stuff done!

thanks again to everyone for posting in here and encouraging each other. there’s no other place with support like this.

LAKELLY: I hope you feel better soon and figure stuff out. take care of yourself. by the way, calling an ambulance and calling your doctor took effort and motivation and self-care so high-fives for that!! PS: I am only 24 and I take 3 pills every day to feel like myself. ain’t no thaaanngg.

QUIZZICAL: good luck! let me know how it goes. trying to work out the chores thing myself right now! remember guys, little steps, little steps.

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[Anonymous]

HIGH FIVE TO YOU POWCAT! Sounds like you have taken some of these suggestions and made them work for you.

I followed a link someone else posted to the FlyLady’s website, and although I generally dislike reading about people who have systems for everything and are way more organized than me (as if an ADDer could really walk around the house decluttering and not get sidetracked with whatever they picked up or saw while doing it), I did like her suggestion of cleaning up after meals rather than later. I had already thought of that – we’ve been doing that for awhile in our house – it’s the only way I can get my husband to help with dishes on my schedule (otherwise they pile up in the sink). But her suggestion was to do it as part of the getting-ready-for-bed process.

I have you beat on the unopened box that moves with you – I’ve got a box in the garage that has moved countless times with me since 1979 … never opened since.

Whiteboards

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I LOVE ‘EM!

My day was something like your dishes – I did a little of one thing, then did two more, then three more, and before I knew it, I had done much more than I expected I would get done! Congrats!

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[powcat]

that’s awesome, ND! HIGH-FIVE! and I say you get rid of that unopened box. if you haven’t needed it in all these years, you probably won’t need it ever. (my mind is on de-cluttering. )

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[Anonymous]

Powcat, I’m afraid to open it, I might want to keep it, I might think I should have opened it years ago as I could really have used it, etc, so many emotions that are hidden in that box!!!

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[Anonymous]

no_dop, I vote for opening the box. Try to make it fun, and try to toss things/or donate, that are no longer significant to you. Good Luck.

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[Anonymous]

lakelly, that’s a good idea. Maybe we could have a box opening party – my husband has a few that could use purging as well.

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[powcat]

maybe get some bins/bags ready so you can sort it out right away (‘to donate’, ‘to chuck’, ‘to keep’, etc)? but it does sound fun! get a bottle of wine and then it will be like opening presents.

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[Anonymous]

i’m new to this site. I’m so happy to find this thread! There are little things I do day to day that are no big deal (for a person without ADHD) so I don’t really feel so great when i do them. If anything, I’m pleased with the accomplishment but then I think “big deal. EVERYONE cleans the kitchen” I know it’s counter productive. so THANK YOU for allowing me to gloat about these achievmants

I spent all day writing yesterday for an essay contest. Now I am going to edit it and then send it to a friend and then submit by wed. This is something i have been thinking about doing for months. Yay me

sorry “gloat” s the wrong word… I meant celebrate!

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[Carrie]

High Fives for everyone!!

No_Dopamine – When I find a box full of my crap from who knows when, or someone says “Oh I have a box of your things here” I say get rid of it before I see it! I obviously am not missing it! Im always afraid to look inside… Always because I sit there forever wanting to keep all of it.

I AM SO HAPPY!! Today is the first day of school for both my kids! I have NEVER been alone EVER in my life! Was pregnant as a teen, then moved out with a baby and fiancee, then had 2 babies and a husband… So today is the first day im ALL ALONE!! WOW! I did very well!! On Friday I came off a night shift, slept for 4 hours then drove for 6hours to Vernon BC. Then I slept. Got up Saturday and went shopping from 10am – 3pm, got the kids all new school clothes, myself some clothes, my husband some clothes. I even had the kids try on EVERYTHING! I made it fun by making the clothes pass the test. My kids would put on a pair of pants then bend over to make sure their butt wasnt hanging out. Then they would jump to make sure they wouldnt fall down, then sit to make sure they were not too short. It was fun for them. It was pretty awesome. I took all the time I wanted! I didnt rush myself at all! It was nice! Then I left Vernon at 5pm and made it back home by 2am. Sunday, I packed up my kids and we went ATVing! IT WAS SO FUN! I havent done that since I was 12 years old! I took them on all the trails I used to ride on and then down to the “private beach” where we collected snail shells and went exploring! I was looking for toads… I havent seen any all year

Yesterday I went grocery shopping. Bought what the kids need for lunches, and I bought some organizers!!! YAY!! Got home and took all the kids old clothes and threw them in the garbage (I WILL NEVER bring it to the thrift store. I normally have bags sitting for months, so for now, garbage!) I put up their organizers, organized their closets, rooms, the front entrance, and still have a lot to do today.

I now understand how we work all over the place and what everyone means by just pick ONE THING and FOCUS ON THAT ONE THING. I didnt notice it before. I had to put the groceries away, but to do that I had to clean the fridge, so I needed the garbage, but it was full and I saw lots of ants, so I grabbed the new ant poison I bought and tried it out! Watched the ants for some time, turned around and thought “oh I need to put groceries away! Right!” went into the fridge, remembered I needed to clean it, went to the garbage “right its full” went to get a garbage bag, saw the kids new organizers I bought, opened them up, went into the daughters closet, started to clean it out. Needed a garbage bag, went to the garbage, saw all the groceries… you get my point! hahahahahaha I was organizing the kids rooms, the front and back door, killing ants and doing laundry all at the same time! Got lots done though!

I am very proud of myself! I am organizing everything so what I need all the time is right there and easy to see and grab/put back. Example, I put up coat hooks instead of hangers because a hook is much faster than a hanger. All the shoes we use daily are at the front door, all the stuff we use once in a while are at the back door. Kids have a place when they come home to put their backpacks, right in sight so we dont forget homework. Etc!! Im so proud and happy about this!! I am finally getting organized! Keeping it all simple and in sight! Woot!

Brought them to their first day of school!! Wow!! My babies in school!! It was good. I wasnt nervous at all with the other parents. I was relaxed and, well at this time, only talked when spoken to. hahahaha I was with my mom who was rushing me. Shes always in a rush and that I didnt like. But on meds I can now control my own thoughts and dont become a panicked wreck when there are a million things going on. Like today at school, a million kids running around, too much noise, my mom rushing me, my own kids calling me. I just stop myself, take a deep breath and take my time. Was good I hope you all are doing well! You all are so awesome!!

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[quizzical]

High five Cynthia for the essay! Way cool – especially since you’ve been wanting to write it for so long! I’m hoping to start up my blog writing again but still haven’t carved out the time – although I can’t help notice that it’s pouring rain outside; this might be an ideal time to finally get some words down!

High Five to Carrie for getting so much done, and still finding time to play! Enjoy your by-yourself day!

I’m still making progress on my schedule creation. Today I entered everything on my list into my computer calendar as recurring appointments. I decided that, rather than go room by room, I’d just give each day of the week a silly name with a theme, such as “Emptiness Day,” “Wipeout Day,” and “Friday Sweepstakes,” and then I grouped the chores accordingly. So far, so good on actually doing the scheduled chores, too – at least the weekly ones, anyway!

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[Anonymous]

Hi, Went to a Peace Corps Intro meeting tonight. While I already sent in an application I have decided that I am going to go for it. It takes a year for the processing and only 5% of candidates out of some 15,000 get picked. ( Even less for the >50 crowd) but it is something that I have always wanted to do. I haven’t felt this excited about anything in quite some time. Wish me luck!

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[Anonymous]

I have a job interview tomorrow….i’ve been unemployed since july!

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[quizzical]

Good luck job seekers! Wishing you every success! High fives for going for it!

Today is “emptiness day” – the day I empty all the wastebaskets, recycling baskets, and the plastic bag holder. I’m feeling good because I’m sticking to my weekly tasks, and not getting sidetracked nearly as much in the process!

I am thinking that in the spirit of Emptiness Day, I am going to empty my head next: I’m starting up a blog specifically about my ADD adventures. (I’d say ADDventures but I think somebody’s already coined that one.) I’ll let you all know when the first post is up; I’m putting a load of laundry in first! Go me!

I can’t go another minute, though, without telling you all how incredibly happy and proud it makes me that so many of you like the idea of this thread. I only knew when I started it that it was something I desperately needed – a few extra pats on the back for just getting it done! So much of my life is like the line in the confessional: “We have left undone those things which we ought to have done.” It’s just so nice to have a place to say “Hey! I did the laundry!” and hear “Hooray!” and not “Finally!” It’s the “Hooray!” that makes me want to do more, no doubt about it!

HIGH FIVES!!!!!!!

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[Author]

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