[Monika]

Hi CheesyLove,

You wrote,

“I have looked online and seen the read the same advice or breaking it down, blah blah blah, but that is NOT enough for me!

i need specific, not broad techniques!

– for example, when it comes to papers, i have my outlines done, my arguments set out, but i just cannot fill in the blank.”

So you ALREADY are breaking it down. So you are half-way done.

1. The next step is paragraph formation every paper needs a beginning, middle, end. Every paragraph needs the same.

http://www.behaviordoctor.org talks about the 3-2-8 paragraph. Three ideas in the introductory sentence, two descriptive sentence per idea and a summary sentence.

2. Set yourself up for success, gather all the materials, tools and instructions you need for the task you’ve set yourself. (If you have to get up for a piece of tape, you’ll probably return back to the project a few hours later holding an icee.)

2. USE a timer, to help you focus, allow no interruptions during the 15-20minutes you have set for one paper. Timer dings then you reset it and either “sharpen your axe” ie, give yourself a break to come back re-freshed or switch to a different paper.

3.Procrastination is a real problem and has a reason almost everytime….lack of confidence, lack of discipline-“grasshopper mentality of I have plenty of time to do it later”, lack of preparation.

If organization and time management are skills you lack, peruse the student control journal found at http://www.FlyLady.net

She is an invaluable resource for creative sidetracked souls trapped in a time-conscious world.

Best wishes on your success and future,

Monika

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[Monika]

jlmccarthy,

In case you read this before you leave, this is from my favorite organizational website, http://www.flylady.net

It’s a very special combination packing and reminder list.

http://flylady.net/pages/FLYingLessons_PackingList.asp

If you don’t see this until you get back, Hope you had a wonderful time. , M

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[Monika]

I think the hardest thing for people without ADD to process is the inconsistency. Some days are better than others, at least in my world. This is the best way I’ve ever heard it explained is this.

ADD affects the frontal cortex of the brain which is in charge of executive functions (directing the brain on what to do, how to act, what to say, what to focus on etc.).

In that respect, it’s like the conductor of an orchestra, telling the strings, brass etc. when to play. When the conductor doesn’t have the music or doesn’t conduct properly, the resultant sound is less than melodious and can at times be painful to listen to. However, when the conductor is at his best,timing is together and music is heard.

The inconsistency of this can lead people believe that the behaviors they see are willfulness, disobediance or non-compliance instead of a true brain miscommunication.

I use this analogy alot, I only wish I remembered who told this to me to give them credit.

I hope it resonated with someone. , M

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[Monika]

@kylep Something more to think about. And you can write on the forums anytime you want without the need or fear of “getting it perfect” that freezes you up.

The written word can be tricky. The best example is a simple sentence. “Let’s eat, Grandma!” without the pause of the comma, we could fear for the safety of Grandma and express concern over the dietary habits of her offspring’s offspring, when you read “Let’s eat Grandma!”

I read somewhere that body language and spoken words convey the meaning of the message most clearly (probably why I like Rick’s Rants so much), while spoken words without body language delivers less of the meaning and the written word (especially when interpreted incorrectly) conveys the least.

So, in summary, write whatever you wish. One thing you can rest for sure about being in the ADD forum, if we have questions, like what you wrote or didn’t like it….you’ll hear about it. (Grin).

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[Monika]

Well, I took it twice and both showed this for me INFP.

For me, pretty accurate. Thanks for posting Bill, it was fun and I really like your “Who’s Awesome” Beagle pic.

Just call me Luke Skywalker with pink (rose-colored) shades.

This is taken from: http://typelogic.com/infp.html

“INFPs never seem to lose their sense of wonder. One might say they see life through rose-colored glasses. It’s as though they live at the edge of a looking-glass world where mundane objects come to life, where flora and fauna take on near-human qualities.

INFP children often exhibit this in a ‘Calvin and Hobbes’ fashion, switching from reality to fantasy and back again. INFPs have the ability to see good in almost anyone or anything. Even for the most unlovable the INFP is wont to have pity.

Of course, not all of life is rosy, and INFPs are not exempt from the same disappointments and frustrations common to humanity. As INTPs tend to have a sense of failed competence, INFPs struggle with the issue of their own ethical perfection, e.g., perfo rmance of duty for the greater cause. An INFP friend describes the inner conflict as not good versus bad, but on a grand scale, Good vs. Evil. Luke Skywalker in Star Wars depicts this conflict in his struggle between the two sides of “The Force.” Although the dark side must be reckoned with, the INFP believes that good ultimately triumphs. “

Reference: http://typelogic.com/infp.html

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[Monika]

I also plan to bring it to an upcoming CHADD chapter meeting in my region. Thanks again and thanks for your excellent customer service!

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[Monika]

@Shuz4me If you need some time management/organizational tips, I can recommend http://www.flylady.net she isn’t just for housekeeping. It sounds like you already are discovering “work arounds” for you night owl tendencies such as setting appointments after 11am when you are more productive. That’s very good.

I’ve just listened to Kate Kelly’s, “You mean I’m not lazy, stupid or crazy?” book about ADD, some good tips in there.

Best wishes on your journey,

M:)

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[Monika]

@Nimthiriel

I can tell you that a timer really works wonders if you 1)have trouble self-starting 2) feel overwhelmed. There are a few TotallyADD fans (like myself) who recommend http://www.FlyLady.net too.

She also suggests when you are going into a room to have 1)a garbage bag 2) a giveaway box 3)a put away basket, (doesn’t have to be the exact nouns-they can all be bags you just might not want to get them confused-imagining apple cores mixed with dirty socks) .

Then as you work the room, you stay in the room without wandering.

She has members on her facebook page playing decluttering games by picking six things on their to-do list and calling out numbers randomly to get them done and a new motto for 2011, “Just do seven, in 2011” which immediately calms down the overwhelmed, where to start, panic that is typical when I think about housework.

It sounds like your methods are working, I just wanted to share. Also your Fiance is a wonderful guy, congratulations!

Best wishes, Monika

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[Monika]

I’m just adding a comment, thanks JayBird for liking http://www.behaviordoctor.org she and http://www.flylady.net are my favorite sanity savers for time and behavior management and organization.

I hope Katastrophe sees this and I hope her daughter is doing well.

Happy Thanksgiving,

M

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[Monika]

I was thinking today, yay! one symptom I don’t have, this doesn’t happen to me when the phone rang with a colleague asking after a report I KNOW she handed to me yesterday but which I didn’t remember proofing, signing and forwarding to the next. (Which I actually did.)

As @Nimthiriel so succinctly stated *facepalm*

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[Monika]

Hi Scattered!

Welcome to the family! I enjoy looking at everyone’s clever “nicknames” here and you have a great one.

TotallyADD recommends life strategies always and medicine (if needed).

My personal recommendation is, if you cannot afford the services of a life coach, check out these free websites for tips on organization and planning;

http://www.flylady.net has (self) “control journals” that help you plan daily routines, weekly routines, monthly routines, money management (the Financial Awareness Continually Empowers – FACE journal).

They even have a holiday control journal to help plan for the holidays so we are;

1. Not searching for the Christmas presents we put in a “safe” place,

2. Not wrapping gifts at 2am on the morning of the 25th,

3. Not buying a gift for nephew Jonathan or Aunt Agatha at Walgreens on the way to Christmas dinner

4. Not maxing out our credit cards with the resulting “sticker shock” in January.

http://www.behaviordoctor.org Dr. Riffel (a positive behavior support educator) has some http://www.blogtalkradio.com shows two about ADD with lists of great rewards. While this is geared more to children, I believe it still has value in understanding that with the proper motivation we can be successful.

Finally, Rick and Dr. J also recommend exercise to aid in focusing, and I agree. There’s a reason we have the phrase “Taking a walk to clear my head.” It really works.

Best wishes on your journey,

M

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[Monika]

I’ve marked this as a favorite because Jeaninet I can so relate. I could have written your post and substituted computers for football, except there is no computer season, its year’round.

One thing I hope you do is make time for yourself. If that means a load of clothes doesn’t get washed or the floor misses a mopping, that’s ok. “Housework even done incorrectly still blesses the family.” And if he comments that the house is missing its manic sparkle, then you say, it’s on my list or perhaps you could help me with that.

I know others here have found help from http://www.flylady.net like me, it shows you how to manage life like a single parent (which during football season for you is completely applicable) and still take care of you.

One last note, your husband is who your husband is. You cannot save him from having regrets later in life over the lack of relationships with his children. But perhaps you can remind him that is what he is earning by not engaging now when they are young. And even a meal together, talking about the day can build a relationship. http://www.behaviordoctor.org said that the 100 free rewards for children on her website can be used just for that.

I’ll be sending you positive thoughts and well wishes.

Contact me anytime if you need an ear or support.

M

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[Monika]

Ok, Rick. Just for http://www.totallyadd.com I wrote to them.

I’m pasting my reply here for anyone who wishes to use it or take from it for their responses. You can write to them here: http://ezorigin.csmonitor.com/About/Contact/Feedback/Comments-and-corrections

” http://www.csmonitor.com/Commentary/Opinion/2010/0819/ADHD-Has-this-diagnostic-fad-run-its-course

I saw no references regarding the research disproving the existence of ADD/ADHD. I, however, can list some resources for this academic scholar (an assistant professor of Educational Studies) NOT a LICENSED PHYSICIAN nor a LICENSED PSYCHOLOGIST that prove that it is a NEUROLOGICAL based disorder involving the Frontal Cortex of the brain. He can start with the American Medical Association (AMA), the Canadian Medical Association (CMA), the American Society of Pediatrics and more.

The fact that he is spreading information that stimulant medication used properly is dangerous when in fact it is safer than aspirin is fabrication. And, that this author linked phrenology (the pseudo science of scalp bump reading) and female hysteria (the Victorian Age ‘s excuse for pelvic massage-yes you read that right), is demeaning, disgusting and harmful.

In addition, it’s presence is not solely in “mis-behaving” hyperactive or daydreamy children. Your author conveniently and purposely left out the high number of adults who continue to evidence ADD/ADHD.

Please take this opportunity to have a physician or psychologist (by all means find a Christian one) to share helpful and enlightening information to your readers regarding the benefits and challenges that people with ADD/ADHD face daily.

Thank you for your time,

M. Marcel “

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[Monika]

Hi Walt,

Perhaps we should send them Rick’s latest offering?

“Full Moon”

http://totallyadd.com/latest-videos

He makes a great case.

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[Monika]

Hi Ritchie,

Congratulations on continuing your education. My favorite Greek sayings are “Nothing in Excess” and “Know Thyself”. Ok, well, the first one won’t apply to you but the second quote will.

What type of learner are you?

Think about how you learn best.

Are you a visual learner?

Perhaps color coded lists/charts for the different drugs. You can organize them according to how common they are. Put all the dosages in different colors. ex. normal dose green, higher dose yellow, dangerous dose red or perhaps red for interactions?

An Auditory learner? use your MP3 player to record the drug protocols (only do 5 minutes at a time and make your voice interested and lively or perhaps you may fall asleep) then listen every chance you get. In the car, the shower (if MP3 is waterproof), when brushing your teeth

Tactile/kinesthetic? These learners need to move, so go walking with your MP3 player, or gardening or write it out, then write it again, then again.

If you want some time management tips, do a search for the great and unfortunately late, Randy Pausch’s Time Management lecture, its worth your time.

Also, although most think http://www.flylady.net is only for home management, I was able to get my distance learning doctoral degree using her system and may be of use to you.

Best wishes and keep us posted about your journey?

M

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