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Hello bluestartattoo,

I take Adderall, No time release or anything. I split a 10mg pill and I am good for the day. I take 5mg in the mornings and 5mg in the afternoon, when I have a long day at work. I take it on the weekends, but I do take an Adderall vacation a weekend  a month.

I have never noticed any side effects or anything, and I have been taking Adderall for over 3 years now. I keep telling people this stuff was tailor made for my brain. The people in my life, who know I have ADD, say it is like night and day, when I am taking my meds and when I wasn’t

There are many, many medications for ADD, and It takes a fair amount of trial and error. Afterward, you will no longer be able to say “I have never experimented with drugs.”

We all have different symptoms of ADD we want to reduce, because they impact our lives so much. Each of our brains is a unique construct, with unique chemistry and unique structure. It stands to reason that medications will affect us all differently as we try to deal with ADD (which also is different in everyone).

I started with Strattera which made me feel like I had insects crawling under my skin (Thank you X-files). I took Ritalin and it made my hart race, and made me jittery. Even at extremely low doses, I had facial ticks and insomnia even worse than “normal”. Does that mean you shouldn’t take those drugs? No. It means *I* shouldn’t take them. There are many people on these forums that are very successful on those medications.

Find one that works for you. One that knocks down the symptoms you most want to see gone. Work on the dose that gives you the most affect, with the least amount of side-effects. Then work out the delivery. Sustained or not?

Hope this helps.

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Someone asked me to draw a clock one time, and I drew a digital. I have never learned how to read an analog clock. They are pretty, but completely unintelligible to me.

@Gianmaria, I think Blackdog has it. Get the diagnosis. I would add one thing. Don’t stop trying to get a diagnosis, until someone tells you what is wrong, or can adequately explain why you are going through what you are, to YOUR satisfaction.

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With me, it is difficult to tell where the ADD leaves off and the Autism begins. Neither condition makes relationships easy. I have a wife who is VERY understanding and lives for those moments in time where I am “there”. As opposed to being inside myself. I can go weeks or months without saying a word to anyone, perfectly content with my thoughts. Not that she lets that happen.

I feel much more comfortable inside myself. Perhaps it is the same with ADD. We take chances every time we do something: Is this the time I screw something up? Or is this the time I get it “right”? We understand the importance of people and our relationships to them, but that only means the stakes get higher, if/when we mess up.

Better to do nothing? Better to not risk anything? Perhaps that is what leads to inaction and “intimacy” issues.

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I can’t not solve a problem. If it is interesting to me, and presented in the right way, I will not stop thinking about it, and working through it, until I have a solution.

This problem could be anything, from any subject matter. Remember a show called “The Finder”? I am like that, except with problems.  I once came close to not being able to solve one that was REALLY interesting. I stormed around the house, arranging models, and rearranging them, until it clicked. It was not a pretty sight.

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For me ADD is a curse. If it were a gift, I could return it.

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You have to realize that I am an “in your face” type of person. I have ADD and Autism so I tend to tell people what I am thinking at the time, with very little filtering (unapologeticly frank).

I was trying to explain to a friend of mine, my situation and how my conditions affected my life. He responded to me in almost the exact same words. Makes me wonder if they saw the same documentary.

 

I told him ” Wow! Did you know in one sentence you just discounted over 120 years of diagnoses, and over 4000 independent studies on the subject, by the top minds in the field? I didn’t know you were that smart.”

It took him a while to figure out, I was not pleased with his statement, but we started talking about it.

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There is a product called “Click and Dig” key finder. I found it at Amazon, and it has a sending unit and a receiver. The idea is you hit “find me” button on the sending unit and the receiver starts making noise. That is how it is supposed to work.

Put it in the hands of an ADD/ADHD (me) and this is how it really works:

Spend 1/2 hour looking for the keys. Give up. Grab the sending unit. Oops. Where is the sending unit? Spend 1hr looking for the sending unit. Find it. Hit the button… trace faint noise through the house. (repeat many times). Leave the house. Noise is now much louder. Hit button. Trace faint noise around the yard. (repeat many times)

Find keys stuck in the door.

Put sending unit in pocket.

Continue day.

Now if only I could get two of them, and put the locator on the sending unit…

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[shutterbug55]

I agree with everyone here. You need to find a doc that specializes in the diagnosis and treatment of  adult ADHD – not child ADHD, not teen ADHD… Adult ADHD. Our needs are different. We have learned behaviors that mask ADD.

I think you need to find an advocate. I have my wife, who goes to all my appointments. She and I talk about questions we want to ask, things we want to work through, and she keeps me on track before during and after the meetings.

An advocate could be a close friend, a relative, spouse – somebody who can help you and has an interest in your well being. This is the person who will make sure your questions are not only asked, but make sure they are answered satisfactorily. Advocates are the third party observer that can tell you if the meds have any affect or not, from an outside perspective. They can tell if a doctor is BS’ing you and call them on it.

Doctors are trained to “know it all”, but they really don’t. I got lucky and found a doc that may not know all the answers, but knows where to look for them. “I don’t know” being a perfectly good response to my questions. It just means we all do some homework.

Medications are individual. Docs have to understand that. Some of them do understand, some of them need a little encouragement.  They do have their favorites, and you and your advocate can research other medications that work well. Adderall is mine. It may make your skin crawl and give you sleepless nights. Wellbutrin… well let’s just say it was a failed experiment on me and leave it at that. It works great for a vast number of people on this forum.

Advocates will help you be persistent. Persistence is one of our weak areas. You are going to need persistence to get the treatment you need, not the treatment they want to give. Advocates can help you nudge your doc into giving you the treatment you need. Be it drugs, counseling, or coaching, or all three.

At the end of the day, the medical profession are just like any other. If they can get you out the door quickly and efficiently, great. You and the advocate, just make sure “quickly and efficiently” is on your terms not theirs. The squeaky wheel gets oiled. Keep squeaking, until you get your “oil”.

Hope this helps.

 

 

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I am with doctormikayla.

I don’t hold grudges, in the classic sense. If I have been wronged, or something someone does to me triggers my “wrongness” buttons, I will obsess about it, until that wrong thing is made right.

Every time that person talks to me, I will remind them about the wrong they need to make right. This is one of my Asperger’s things, and I am getting better about it. Letting go of that stuff is difficult.

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Not necessarily circular, but that self loathing, and no self worth is perceived by others. So they tell me. Conversely, the confidence over having something you enjoy is also perceived.

There are things you do better than most people, and derive enjoyment from doing them. I have no idea what they are. That is for you to find. Do you make models? Do you watch stars? Shoot pool? Something out there you enjoy doing and are good at.

Why do I harp on those things you are good at? Because the world is full of people telling us what we are doing wrong, and what we are doing poorly. Nobody is there telling us what we are good at.  That wears us down, because it becomes a tape we run in our heads that gets played every time something goes wrong. We have to  break that tape, or put another message on it. Finding those things we enjoy doing, is part of that. That way, when we hear “What? You failed again? Can’t you do anything right?” The answer becomes: “Yes as a matter of fact I can. I can put a ship in a bottle. ”

It is one thing that is easier for autistics, because we can zone out on something and have fun just learning and exploring. Returning to that thing is like a vacation retreat.

 

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I know what you mean, xephier.

With my difficulties, communicating in general is very hard to do. I am sure I don’t write as efficiently or as fluidly as other people do, but it gets areas of my brain working that would not ordinarily get used. If I had to depend on writing for a career, I would be a LOT thinner!

Writing stories helps me with organizing my thoughts, so I can write papers for work, letters, and even when I am speaking. A lot of my “writing” happens when I speak into a head-set and the computer types. Technology is a beautiful thing!

It is like my woodworking. That helps with my spatial orientation, and organization. I also need to keep things in my head, which forces the use of working memory.

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Hello xephier,

I for one have multiple disorders (Dyslexia, ADD, Autism) which have profound affects on my life. Even after being diagnosed and getting treatment, some of the decisions/damage/do-overs just can’t be fixed. I think people treat us different, because we ARE different. We process information differently. That would be information we are trying to learn (input) and information we are trying to relate to others (output).

As you can guess I am into computers. They have held my fascination, ever since I saw my first one in 68. Yea I’m one of those Old Geezers. When I was a wage-slave, I programed them. Which brings me to my outlook on life. Life is much better, when I am working on those things I like. Generally, those are also the things I am good at. I also enjoy making things with my hands. Woodworking, pottery, metalworking… you name it. While I don’t have a “Santa’s Workshop”, I do make quite a lot of toys and give them away for Christmas. I like doing that.

My secret to finding people? First find something you like doing. Do it. That way there is something about your life that brings enjoyment.  I have found that walking around, hating myself, hating life, and describing my experience in terms of F—ing this and F that, brings me to the question that my mom asked me a long time ago.  How can anyone like or love you, when you don’t like or love yourself?

Hang in there.

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OK. Looks like I didn’t answer your question. I get that a lot. 🙂

First my standard disclaimer: I am not a pharmasist nor am I a pharmacologist. I am just someone who has had lots of experience with lots of drugs. That probably shouldn’t be included on my resume, should it?

OK: Ritalin SR is the sustained released version of Ritalin. Meaning it delivers a continuous supply of Ritalin (Methylphenidate) to your system over time (about 8 hours).  It is a stimulant and there are warnings that it can be “habit forming”. I am ADD. ANYTHING that can form habits for me is a good thing! It took about 30 mg twice a day to allow me to have some control over my ADD. Concentration was still difficult and I was still ruled by impulsive outbursts and actions. I am very sensitive to medication and I found Ritalin gave me headaches and it made my heart race. At 60, that is not something I take lightly. It turned out to be causing high-blood pressure.

Ritalin has been around for a long time. I took it as a child, when my parents discovered I had Dyslexia. Over that 6 month period, my grades improved, I could read, I was attentive, and a “model” student. So say the nuns that were teaching us.

My parents in their infinite wisdom, did not want me labeled as “Different”, so they took me off Ritalin. Of course I was back to “normal” within days. I was labeled “dummy” by my classmates, instead.

 

Vyvanse(lisdexamfetamine) is a central nervous system stimulant. I can’t tell any difference in how they act in my system, but they are supposed to act differently. Again, that is beyond my learning of the two medications (Help Dr J!). I do know that I had to take 50 mg twice a day, for it to have an affect on my ADD symptoms. I only took it for a week, because the side effects for me were terrible. I had tremors, ticks, my heart felt like it was going to beat out of my chest, I didn’t eat much( not necessarily a bad thing), and I couldn’t sleep.

I am now taking Adderall (dextroamphetamine) 5mg twice a day. No side effects, and my ADD symptoms are very much in control.

Here is the bad news: Everyone reacts to these drugs differently and you have to find the combination of drug, timimg, and strength that helps you the most and gives you the least side effects.

I wrote a list of ADD symptoms that sabotaged my life the most. That became my standard. If the drug helped with those symptoms, then it was a possibility. It took me 6 months of experimentation with me as the guinea pig and my wife as the scientist. We took lots of notes. We were both looking for real and positive changes in my behavior and coping ability. Side effects were noted.

 

Hope this helps.

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@Zukosinferno

I think being ADD is like running in a marathon where everybody else is running in the wrong direction. Of course it could be my autism speaking.

I have an advocate. My wife knows me better than I know myself, sometimes and she is a very interested third party, who accompanies me to my appointments. This is part of how I work within the confines of their (the NT’s) world. This also takes away some of the anxiety and fear of seeking treatment for me. It might help with your fear as well. Its OK to be afraid. It’s that fear of the unknown. Believe me the fear is much worse than reality.

My advocate does those things that I have difficulty doing. She will take notes, while I concentrate on what my counselor or life coach is telling me. Both of us together ask the questions and make sure they get answered. I record the sessions for later review.

I get ahead of myself. It all starts with the diagnosis. It isn’t easy, and it will bring up a bunch of emotions as you sift through your past. An advocate can help with that too. The diagnosis is just a way of identifying what you have. That starts the process of treatment. That is where your life gets better. Remember, you are already living with ADD. The only difference between what you are living with before and after the diagnosis, is afterward, you are being TREATED for ADD.

So… Take a deep breath or many. Enlist an advocate. Get your diagnosis. Get treated. It is not fun. It is not easy. It IS WORTH IT.

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It sounds like you do not have an official diagnosis from either the US or Canadian side of the border.

You might want to get an official diagnosis. I think in Canada, you need a referral, and that means convincing a GP for the referral.

If I am wrong, and you have a diagnosis from the US, it should be a matter of having your Canadian doctor request your records.

In addition to that, I would get a friend, spouse, or someone to stand in as your advocate. This person’s job is to take notes and keep you on track so your questions get asked and answered. They also provide a third party perspective on you and your behavior. My wife is my advocate, and she is with me during my sessions with my shrink and my life coach. I have both ADD and Autism (Asperger’s).

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