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January 4, 2013 at 3:56 am in reply to: I hate getting out of bed in the morning, but I also hate going to bed at night. #118097
YES, Robbo getting up in the morning is like coming up out of anesthesia, or being drugged. I am clumsy, stumbling in the morning. I can barely line my ass up with the toilet. It feels like my whole body is made of sludge.
REPORT ABUSEScattybird – “but sleeps you focus”
Wow. Somebody else. I wondered if I was the only one who does that.
REPORT ABUSEAnxiety & ADHD
Depression & ADHD
Financial Issues
OVERCOMING Procrastination
Finish PROJECTS THAT You Start!
Mindfulness & Meditating
Sleep Issues
REPORT ABUSEI don’t really feel like I did all that much to help at all, but thanks Rick for this acknowledgement. The whole thing felt like a gift – a sneak peek behind the scenes of a cool new thing. It was kind of like getting a backstage pass at a rock concert. Because everyone that works to put this site together is a total rock star.
REPORT ABUSEOne of my favorites, too, was the rapping bit. I was in stitches!
One of the things I really love about both vids is that they manage to find a perfect balance between “This is really important, serious information about a disorder that, left untreated, has dire consequences.” and “This stuff is so funny we just have to laugh and act silly about it. You can’t make this stuff up.” And what’s interesting, the “funny guys” act as the leads, the hosts, for the film, cutting off to interview tape pieces from the experts. I thought that was really neat about this. If it happened the other way around, if you had some expert act as the host, and then had the expert cut to taped clips of the funny guys displaying ADD/ADHD traits, it will feel very condescending to me. Almost like, “Watch the monkeys go. See what I mean?” with an implied eyeroll. Also, the funny guys are allowed to be comedians, but also have moments of seriousness that show that they’re not really complete baffoons. It really showed all the talent and heart that these two have.
Also, the experts, if I’m not mistaken, many of them were also sufferers. That matters. You trust them. It’s not a doctor who’s just read and studied the problem, they’ve experienced it. That just instills a lot of trust for me.
The “Mastering It” video picks up where “Loving It” left off, so if you felt a little weepy at the roll of the credits on the first one, you can check this one out for another fix.
I’m glad I downloaded it so that I can keep it. On really, really bad days, when I’m feeling down, when I’m feeling Lazy, Crazy, Stupid, I want to have this on hand to go back and watch.
It’s like a little pep talk. It’s like a friend saying, “Don’t forget. You have this. It’s real. Stop beating yourself up. Beat the ADD instead.”
REPORT ABUSEkc5jck – HA!
Thanks for reading!Also, so far as head trauma – I feel off the back of a ride at a fair as a child. I wonder…
REPORT ABUSEHow do you consume the coconut oil? Just spoon it up and take it? Or do you cook with it?
REPORT ABUSEMy whole life goes haywire when I’m getting close to starting my period. Just thought I’d throw in a “me too.” It’s horrible. My impulsivity takes over. I’m much more liable to say silly stuff, buy things I can’t afford and don’t need, get angry and lash out, or enter into a horrible depression. It seems completely unstoppable. Like trying not to vomit.
PMS is my ADD nausea.
REPORT ABUSERobbo, good points.
I do have to say, that “Man up” as it is used to mean “Grow up” is highly offensive to women. It implies that mature, emotionally stable behavior is exclusive to the male of the species.
(Robbo, I’m not accusing you of being offensive, or even of using the term yourself, just reading your post made me think of another thing to say.)
Also, Toofat, regarding “judge not.” This isn’t about judging. This is about what behaviors we tolerate in our workplaces. I think the wrong suggestion here would be to “take the hard knocks without a whimper.” Even the connotation of the word “whimper” implies that anyone who would speak up against what is unprofessional, non-productive behavior is childish, is a crybaby. That sounds exactly like the kind of language and qualifying that would be used by a bully to shut up his target.
Sure, as Robbo said, sometimes you have to be gruff. If the new guy with lesser experience wants to risk not wearing a helmet, I can see a manager or another employee shouting, getting in the guy’s face, same as I can see and understand a parent who doesn’t believe in corporeal punishment rather roughly grasping and pulling their child away from the danger of an oncoming car.
What we’re talking about here, though, sounds like a supervisor speaking to an employee in a way that is out of line. Your post illuminates the reality of the situation as it exists, however I still contend that just because this is what was, and what is, doesn’t mean it should continue to be; it shoudn’t be tolerated, despite what has previously been tolerated in male-dominated trades.
REPORT ABUSEAll of what Toofat said may be true.
My question is, do we want any of this “testosterone driven,” “male dominant” behavior to continue to be true?
So sad how man/men/testosterone was mentioned throughout Toofat’s post in regards to horrible workforce behavior that is lacking in compassion and, in my opinion, sustainability for the future.
Man up? I say, disMANtle.
REPORT ABUSERight, but ADHD is, in a sense, recognized, in that it isn’t just a bunch of “fooey” to them. Ie, ADHD is considered “valid.”
REPORT ABUSEWhy talk to someone who is clearly personality-challenged? That would be your son spinning his wheels, and further exposing himself to this nit-wit’s chastising. There’s a brick wall at the end of that road.
Have your son contact HR with this little basket of goodies:
Every employee has the right and reasonable expectation that they will not be harrassed on their worksite. Violation of those rights would point any clear-minded person toward taking legal action against those persons or companies involved in such violations. Your son, in addition, has a disability that is considered valid under the Americans with Disabilities Act which allows him certain extra, reasonable accomodations and protections that, if ignored, would be of grave consequence to the company that employs him. These rights are pertinent regarding any disclosed OR PERCEIVED disability. Clearly, your son’s supervisor perceived a disability, and instead of taking an attitude of accomodating that, he took on a stance of animosity. If the poor decisions and brash actions of this company’s one supervisor toward a disabled worker were to reach the media and become a blight upon said company, why…..
that would be most unfortunate, wouldn’t it?
REPORT ABUSEI, too, have this fear. Right now, I am single. And sick. I have a cold, but, other than that, I have a blood pressure issue that, along with ADHD, hinders me from getting a whole lot done on my own. Often, I find myself wishing I had someone to help me. Particularly when I’m acutely sick, I wish I had someone to run to the store for me to get medicine, or kleenex, instead of having to just suffer or drag myself, sick, out to the store to get it myself. I find myself thinking “I want my mommy.” She lives four and a half hours away, so I can call her, but she can’t do an errand for me, or fix soup for me. At those moments, I want to beg her to move in with me, even though that would probably be a mistake (We have a much healthier relationship with distance.) I often wonder what will happen to me if I remain single for the rest of my life? When I’m an old lady, will I be alone? How will that work??? Who will take care of me???
I cannot fathom my mother passing. I don’t even want to think about needing, wanting to call her and ask her some cooking question, or just talk to her, or make sure she is okay, and not being able to do that.
I am an only child. I have no other family than my mother. I have very few friends.
I often feel like an astronaut, disconnected from the spaceship, floating alone in the universe.
Ha, was that melodramatic enough? Truly how I feel though!
REPORT ABUSESo glad to see this thread.
It serves as a reminder to me that I shouldn’t get all stressed out about Am I taking the right medication? Should I take a different dose? and that I should at least put equal thought into other strategies and tools to help with my ADD.
And tools that I will actually use, instead of tools that I will admire but leave in the box.
Still, it is difficult.
I’m a perfectionist as well as a procrastinator, and one thing that gets in the way of my starting, other than the ADD paralysis, is my desire to get things perfect. Even my ADD treatment. Even the tools I select to deal with my ADD.
I get all fired up about a new strategy (typically, a schedule), tell myself I’m going to stick to it, and fail to remember that stick to-ing anything is…….kinda the difficult thing with ADD.
The only thing I tend to be able to stick to are unproductive ruts! Television, internet, junk food, etc.
But maybe we can encourage each other to get to it.
ha! Instead of setting a specific alarm for myself, which is a tool I’ve found doesn’t work because I will typically ignore the specific task it is reminding me to do because I’m not in the mood to do that particular task, I could simply set an alarm that says “Get to it!” when it goes off, and it can serve as a reminder, maybe not to do a specific thing, but to get to doing SOMETHING other than my mainstays.
Do something different, something connected, something productive.
It could be write a poem or brush my teeth.
If I have a choice in the matter, I’m much more likely to choose to do SOMETHING. I can say “I don’t want to organize my pocketbook now.” But I’m less likely to say “I don’t want to do ANY different, connected, productive thing right now.”
The alarm would help me get away from the tv and do things that benefit my mind/body/soul. Hopefully!
REPORT ABUSELarynxa – I’m in the same boat with you. My mom doesn’t like the idea of therapy, doesn’t see the point in talking to people about her problems, but somehow fails to see that she does like talking to people about her problems, it’s just that “people” happens to be me, her daughter. I’ve been in the role of therapist for years. So when she says she doesn’t like talking about her problems, I either get frustrated or laugh.
She doesn’t have health insurance and, unfortunately, neither the local mental health clinic nor the free clinic here offer services for ADD/ADHD. The free clinic refers patients with mental health issues to the mental health clinic, which is understandable, but what is really a ridiculous lack is the fact that the local mental health clinic does not offer any diagnosis or treatment for ADD/ADHD. My mom inquired, and they said flat out “We don’t deal with that here.”
Actually, they probably do deal with it, considering the high incidence of co-morbidity that ADD has with other mental health problems, it’s just that they refuse to recognize that they do indeed deal with it, thus are dealing with it really rather ineffectively.
The more I think about it, the angrier I get.
Why are they refusing to treat ADD? Is it not enough of an issue? Not enough of a public threat? Not something scary like schizophrenia or bipolar disorder? Not real enough? Not important enough? Not life-crippling enough?
Granted, this is the same place where I had a doctor try to put me on a diet in response to the 100+lb weight gain I had on an anti-psychotic. Made me feel like it was my fault, like it was something I had to battle, rather than a serious indication that this drug had very dangerous side effects for me. They were convinced that I was bipolar, and that I should be drugged, no matter what. When I stopped having my period as a result of the same medication, this “doctor” asked, “Do you really need to have your period?”
Okay, now that I’ve made myself angry at the lack of effective medical care for the poor….
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