[Tiddler]

That sounds just about perfect, kc.

Yes, I’ve let some dear friends slide away through losing phonenumbers, failing to return calls etc etc etc.

On the other hand, I’ve allowed some pretty toxic people to stay in my life at times, because I didn’t have the confidence to step away and risk hurting their feelings, regardless of how I was feeling.

I’m stronger now, and generally better at spending time with the people I want to be with and avoiding those I don’t.

Cyber space helps a LOT.

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[Tiddler]

Oh.

I did take my meds at lunchtime instead of first thing though. Maybe I’m being alerired or tirert (alert tired tired alert)

What happens when you work from 8am till 10.30 pm and try to get some sleep because you have to do the same tomorrow?

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[Tiddler]

Good luck!

We struggle with this sort of thing too – me ADHD, him Aspie – both together ‘can’t you do it?’ ‘I’d rather you did it’, ‘if you do it I’ll…(insert bargaining chip here)’ ‘Still can’t face it. What about you do it and I’ll (insert even bigger bargaining chip here)’…

Late, no sense, must sleep, too much work, random rubbish spout I am…

Where’s Peter been hiding. No hippos anywhere…

Not been drinking by the way…

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[Tiddler]

Thank you, SayWhat. This is why I come to this site – these little things that amount to such a huge amount of support.

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[Tiddler]

I wonder what the stats are for ADHD relationships. I know we’re more likely to have broken relationships behind us. I’m interested to know both what we can do to improve things from our partners’ points of view AND to know how many of us have such low self esteem that we choose entirely unsuitable partners who are either looking for someone to control or someone to belittle. I know that happened to me twice before I met my husband.

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[Tiddler]

I’m glad you have found peace and freedom from your distressing relationship.

However, I must add that your bad relationship does not equate to all relationships where one person has ADHD.

Perhaps you could have said, IF your relationship is a damaging one, then leave.

For you, it didn’t work out. For many, many more of us, we are having happy, healthy, fulfilling relationships.

As an ADHDer who has been physically, sexually and emotionally abused by someone who was supposed to love me, I think it worth mentioning that it is not always the person who has ADHD who is causing the problems.

My marriage is a strong one. My husband is not ignored. We do not have a life of ‘lowered expectations’. We treat each other with respect.

I’m sorry once again that your relationship was so damaging and I’m glad it’s over for you, but please be careful not to tar us all with the same brush.

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[Tiddler]

Love the videos. well done everyone who posted one.

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[Tiddler]

Good article. I agree with the first doctor though, particularly this: Many other problems, such as learning disabilities, anxiety, sleep apnea and child abuse, or a child being gifted, can cause symptoms that may be misdiagnosed as ADHD. Too often practitioners don’t take the time needed to make that distinction.

ADHD needs to be diagnosed or excluded carefully and I know people whose children were ‘diagnosed’ very quickly indeed. I also know a teacher who has had several children in her school whose parents prime the kids to ‘play up’ to get medication and then sell it.

As someone with experience of highly and exceptionally gifted children, I also know that they are being misdiagnosed with ADHD FAR too often.

We all know it’s real and that drugs are a lifesaver. But we have to be VERY careful that this is done properly and, as yet, it isn’t always. Not even nearly always.

However, what he failed to mention was that there are many others who are failing to be diagnosed who are not accessing help and that is as big a problem.

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[Tiddler]

I agree with kc too.

I don’t spend long on here, but I spend every spare moment at my computer. Too much time arguing with people about news stories mainly…that isn’t helping me one bit really!

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[Tiddler]

That’s really hard, larynxa. Always cotton for me – I agree!

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[Tiddler]

I forget to drink – I pour a pint of water, put it down and forget it’s there. My husband finds full and half drunk glasses all round the house.

I’m often dehydrated and have problems with painful bladder syndrome, which is hardly surprising when I think about it…ADHD is pretty far reaching really. I wonder if the ADHD has caused the painful bladder syndrome and the years of UTIs…

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[Tiddler]

Hiya and thanks – some great tips.

I got sick of my kids’ socks getting mixed up but they both need black for school – so one has all black and one has black with coloured toes and heels.

I never understood ‘summer’ and ‘winter’ wardrobes – I have jeans and short sleeved tops all year round and when I’m cold I put a cardie over it. I have a pair of ‘wedding’ shoes, a pair of day to day shoes and a pair of walking the dog shoes.

I keep earplugs next to the bed – I bought a cheap lot of 50 pairs so it doesn’t matter that I keep losing them! They help me get a decent night’s sleep. I have to put them in first time I wake up as I fall asleep with a DVD on. I used to wake up a dozen or more times a night and now I usually just wake up that once. (Remember to put the alarm on LOUD!)

I put fast, loud music on when I want to get some housework done.

I work from the top down when I’m in the shower so I don’t forget anything – I got sick of getting out of the shower with conditioner still in my hair and my face not washed!

I gave up on a handbag – inhaler, cash-card and keys in my jeans pockets and off I go.

I take deep breaths when I wake up to help get me going – and I allow time for my hands to start working by clenching as much as I can until I can grip again, then I get up.

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[Tiddler]

I found out while on a journey to work out what was going on with our eldest son – I started seeing me in the information. Then, through work, I had to learn more and it was like I could suddenly see over the waterline. This site was a godsend. Knowing has literally completely changed my life. (I was 39 when I found out.)

what do you do or have done to better your life and those close to you? What do you do at work to improve?

I got diagnosed.

I gave up teaching and I have started a new career.

I take concerta.

My husband took on the day to day housework and I do the stuff that can be done randomly.

I have more self confidence,

I stood up to a bullying influence in my life.

I spend time doing things I want to do rather than things I think other people want me to do.

I got cowboy’d up and learnt how to get stuff done MY way.

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[Tiddler]

People make that face at me all the time! I love John Cleese too.

Been cleaning all day. Now have piles of crap all over the floor. And dining table.

And now I have to go pick up the kids so the piles will bleed into each other and the charity shop books will bleed into the ebay books and the pile of DVDs with no cases will slide against stuff and get scratched and the library books will get lost in the chaos and I’ll get a big bill for them and…I’m going to TRY not to let that happen this time!

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[Tiddler]

Also, I loved that game so much that my cat was almost named after the creator, but my ex got his own way and he was named after a Starwars character! Geek alert!

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[Author]

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