[Robbo]

Wow @Scattybird, that is really cool. Watching this woman balance all those branches felt like a guided meditation exercise. Real relaxing, thanks for posting that.

 

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[Robbo]

Yep, my problem with authority figures runs deep… very deep. It’s been driving me back out into the deepness of the sea, the blue green paradise where some of us need to go to heal.

I’ll be back though.

count on it

R-

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[Robbo]

Hey, it’s great to see you in and around our forums old friend. Friend of old… And by my estimation it’s about time for you to send me an email too man. It will be good to catch up with ya. Heck I might even send you an enthusiastic high five if I hear from you.

I’m easy to please dude.

R-

 

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[Robbo]

This is one of the better threads I’ve read on this site. And that’s saying a lot!, heck I’ve spent an enormous amount of time here over the last two+ years. I’m gonna quote some of the best stuff I’ve found in this thread.

To keep our mouths shut when we have something “important” to say would be Chinese water torture for an ADDer.

Mhmm, totally. Some days it’s like being 5 years old again, but more painful because I’m surrounded my grown up adults, (well most of them…) and even the less mature folks that I’ve been spending my time with still have the fine art of behaving like a grown up taken to an art-form.  For me it’s usually just   an act.

It’s torture spending too much time with people. (period!)

I bet I’ve been pushing myself way too hard lately. Lot’s and lot’s of social contact. Lot’s and lots of dis-comfort… That’s how I came to write my little novel on that other thread.

 

In answer to the original question, I write stuff down. If I feel the need to share my opinion, I write it down and if it still sounds like a good idea/question after the meeting is over, I put it into an email.

This is the single most important solution to my problem with people. All people. Even my own mind when I’m trying to meditate.

N.T.S. Write it down man!

 

Here’s a quick tip @Babyjo  (you probly thought of it by-now) Right click on the “login” thing, open a new window, log in. Then, when it’s done. Come back to the page you left when you right clicked. Then just right click again, and hit “reload”- presto change oh, yer good ta go gal.

 

Allan, the maniac from the land down under. Well said…

Yes, I do talk too much, rarely listen at all, and it takes unbearable restraint to keep my mouth firmly shut when within earshot of the banal, the boring, or the blowhard!

You are indeed a kindred spirit. I too suffer from a seemingly terminal case of being rough around the edges. Exactly like a large chunk of granite that just fell off the mountain into a raging rushing river. It ain’t good to be bounced around and beaten against the rest of “the rolling stones”, but we are indeed getting all of our rough edges buffeted and broken off and eventually, after a long and very painful journey down this river of humanity.

We can look foreword to being a little bit smoother. Just alil bit. You will still be that same chunk of Rock my friend. Don’t be afraid of a little smoothing of your elbows.

Not that that I have judged you and think you’re afraid. I just know that I am.

The trouble with me and possibly you too. Is that we are made of some extremely hard stone. It’s indeed a possibility that the moniker I used at another forum for many years was more prophetic that I ever realized.

I called myself Marblehead at first. Later… after I started to mellow out some. Or so I thought I was mellowing out… I called myself “Marble”

I never thought about it as the kind of stone that they make statues out of. Maybe I did think of me as the substance that rich folk like to walk on. Good enough for someones floor I suppose.

Mostly it was just short for “Marblehead” that’s because I felt like I had a bunch of marbles up where most folks have brain.

I think I might go ahead and change my moniker here again.

Just to hide out some more from the real world. I still feel like they might not really like me as much as they say.

 

My final thought on this subject is that I’ve realized what will and does work wonders for me. On the advice of a man by the name of Chuck C.

“Whatever we give 100% of our attention, interest, and love, becomes the most interesting thing in the world”

In his book “A New Pair Of Glasses” Chuck says “Even something as mundane and un-interesting as shaving in the morning can become interesting and even entertaining” (not an exact quote) I haven’t read the book in many years.  I did read it more than 7 times. Heck I sorta studied  it back in 1990 when I quit booze and needed something positive to obsess over.

It worked out…

Take it easy you guys.

There’s hope, always.

 

 

 

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[Robbo]

I think it’s called meditation. Way back when I was interested in reading the stuff people like the Dali Lama had to say. I used to also read a lot about TM. Tricky meditation. Actually it was transcendental… and I did indeed transcend (a : to rise above or go beyond the limits of. b : to triumph over the negative or restrictive aspects of : overcome.) many of the distasteful aspects of my particular ADHD madnesses. Unfortunately I’m still dealing with a struggle or two.

Mainly it’s keeping my body in shape because I’ve been taking up some of the goals on my lil bucket list that I made almost two years ago. Just found it on Sat. Heck you guys, I forgot about most of them.

This is why we write so much down. Writing things down has become one of my key habits. When I meditation I even sometimes keep a note pad handy. In the same way that we keep a note pad handy when listening to another person. It’s a good idea to keep on handy when meditating. That’s because I’m listening to one heck of an obnoxious chatterbox when I meditate.

Works for me you guys.

Sorry if I kinda high-jacked your thread, it looks like a good article. And now that I actually went back are did read it… I have to say that I agree with it. In fact, doing nothing is what I have found out that I can do really well too Mr. Wallace. Thanks for sharing. It would be fun to see what you’ve got to say if you decided to elaborate on the “fine are of doing nothing” Sound like fun? 

The truth is that I just get a kick out of your writing style. That’s all.

R-

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[Robbo]

What an awesome community we have here. It’s really cool to have teachers here. We’re all students, but we can also teach each-other too. I bet I do this a lot by making so many mistakes and then telling you guys about them. I teach ya all what not to do just as much as I might show ya how to manage ADHD.

Thanks for sharing you guys.

It’s smart to have an accountability partner. It’s risky too, because I tend to dislike anything like authority in my life. It’s not authority so much as encouragement that a partner can give us. I like to be the encouragement part of the accountability partnership. It’s easy because like a lot of dudes with ADHD, I’m extremely enthusiastic about almost anything. Even boring stuff.

Cuz I’ll get bored otherwise…

Hopefully the female partner I’ve been hanging around with will decide I’m a suitable man to help her with her stuff. it ain’t ADD she’s struggling with. Mostly it’s putting up with me, but…

A romantic relationship is not always the ideal kind of “accountability partner”. Maybe not at all. But It’s a partnership I’ve been working really hard on lately. It’s good to know some men who have experience with romantic relationships.

I wish we had alil more talk about romantic relationships here. It ain’t easy!!!!.

It didn’t look like it was going to work out several times over the last few weeks. It’s been hot and very heavy, and it’s developed really really quickly you guys. As you can imagine… I told her right from the beginning “buckle up Dorothy, Kansas is going bye bye”. But she’s one cool cucumber and seems to handle my seriously radical and reckless ADHD ways with the greatest of ease.

I think… I hope so anyways. Heck, my imagination sometimes goes completely bat shit crazy you guys. But I’m managing to hold myself together…. mostly.

There’s a decent chance I’m gonna finally slow down and even settle down you guys.

But I’m also working really hard and getting some accountability partners of the same sex too. I bet it’s even more important now that I’ve got a woman I want to hang around with.

I can’ depend on her for a  sounding board each and every time I have a struggle in this life. That would simply overwhelm the crap outa her!!!. This is not something I ever want to see…

If you’ve got aspergers then what I said probably came across and totally disgusting. But I’m fortunately not talking in terms of the literal. For crying out loud you guys, get yer mind out of that gutter!. lol

Sorry, I’m just talking about how it’s likely that some of my antics have almost driven this fine fine woman in my life straight away from me as fast as she could travel.

The stuff I’ve learned at this web site, from the videos, and from watching first the video “ADD and Loving It?!, a bunch of times, and lately I’ve watched ADD and Mastering It a couple times too.  Are helping me to actually have a decent romance in my life. It’s been a very long time since I even had any hope at all about finding someone to be in love with.

I think I may have found her. Yep. Mrs Right. I wont tell you her real name just yet. That would be more risk that I’m willing to take. I will tell ya that the video ADD and Mastering It has been really coming in handy, yep!. A lot!. It’s absolutely packed with dense and thorough solutions to just about every ADHD/ADD related struggle the exists. 

Almost too much solution packed into a single video. But it ain’t too much.

We are sometimes too much though.

Ain’t that the truth?.

So I’m gonna go ahead and watch my silly video again. As soon as one of my ADHD friends who borrowed it brings it back. He forgot it again the last time he came over to help me be accountable with all my ADD related drama… I’m super forgetful, so I gotta be patient when other folks do this.. A lot.

DGMS

R-

PS, I think I’m gonna have to buy another one… or maybe I’ll just watch the add n loving it one… ah crap… Oh, I know,. I’ll meditate. Yep. that’s the ticket!.

mhmm.

meditate.

listen to the brain chatter on purpose!!! AACK!

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[Robbo]

Good post @Larynxa, I can’t always relate to everything you say, but I’m definitely glad you’re here so very much. Thanks.

I’ve been away from here for quite some time now. It’s because I went on vacation a while back mostly. And it’s just hard to get myself back into the groove of participating in this community. This community has helped me to find the strength to meet many of my goals.

I’m gonna try to come back more often and share much more of what I’ve been finding on my lil trudge on the road of happy destiny.

If you’re struggling with ADHD, let me tell you that for sure, you definitely will see better days.

Just stick with us. You will indeed go far.

I just posted the next part of this post on facebook. But I like this web site much better than facebook. This is because this is a community, people real people indeed.

Good people.

Thanks very much Rick.

Robbo

——————————————————–

I was gonna put this at the top as a new post, but it got a lil bit long winded so I’ve decide to just stick it down here. Enjoy you guys.

What’s on my mind?
More than just a couple of the good men in my life have been riding a lot, or thinking about buying a motorcycle. People often ask me questions like “if you could be riding again, would you?” and “Do you ever regret riding as much as you did?”

Yep. The answer inside my head before I speak is sometimes yes, and sometimes no. But what I actually say is much more complicated.

The reason we ride is what’s complicated. And the list of reasons could take a long while to talk about indeed.

It’s about freedom of the spirit. Freedom to travel great distances, and to meet interesting people from all around the world. To see exceedingly beautiful country, and most of all to experience the adrenaline rush that we feel during extreme acceleration. It’s also really fun to escape impending doom, and dodge the careless drivers all over the road that fail to see us on a regular basis. Folks simply do not, and will not share the road with us.

Accept this fact.

All the very creatice and interesting posts across facebook, the cool pictures that say things like “share the road with bikers” “I’d rather be riding” yadda yadda blah blah blah… It ain’t gonna happe my friends. You do not have a right to “own the pavement” or do what any other catchy prase you want to post says about your so called right to seek adrenaline at the expense of all the people in your life, that care very much for you. Are they sitting home growing an ulcer while you are out there catching bugs between your teeth?. How do you know if this hobby of yours is causing them to feel fear in a way that ain’t nearly as fun as the fear you love so very much.

Feel guilty?. Well guess what my friend. If you feel guilty then there’s a good chance you are. Ask yourself one simple question.

Do I feel lucky?. Well do ya punk? ***imagine my voice sounding like Clint Eastwood*** Then try to lighten up a lil. Because I’m not here to moralize about you riding a bike. I’m just gonna share a little bit of what’s going on inside me.

I gotta tell ya, there’s not substitute for the joy I feel in my heart when my relationship with Jesus Christ is healthy and strong. But when it’s not. My relationship with other human beings suffers just as much. Probably even more. When I’m not walking with God, I’m not happy. Period.

That’s when I tend to gravitate toward adrenaline seeking behaviors. It’s no secret to the few friends I’ve got that I’m been itching to get my butt back into the sea a lot lately. The truth is that the Pastor in my church has been talking a lot about pride, and humility, and about how the grace of Jesus Chist is sufficient unto all of my needs. A lot the last few weeks. It’ really hitting home too. And not because I’m humble. It’s my pride problem. We all got this.. being prideful as a human condition we all struggle with, and it always has been.

So go ahead and get that bike if you don’t have one. If you’ve got one, go ahead and ride it until your heart is content. Just know this. And know it well.

There is always risk in this life. You don’t get to decide when and where the loving God that made us will take you home. But you can increase the chances of meeting Him. You can and will indeed meet your maker very soon if you decide that riding a motorcycle is the only way for you to feel like you’ve got freedom, to get out and see the country, meet interesting people, and go to interesting places. Do it man!. But don’t be surprised if you end up painting the road with your skin very soon.

Folks just don’t see you on that bike.

It’s much easier to just increase your concious contact with God. Spend a lot more of your time with the members of the body of Christ. They are all at your church. Go spend some time with them, okay?.

And slow yourself down, listen to the Holy Spirit. This is the gut instinct deep down in your gullet. I think we all hear the voice of God in different ways. For most of us in comes in the voice of the church people we’ve got in our lives. There are just a few people in my life you say they actually hear the audible voice of God. I think this can be very risky in and of itself. I know that my imagination can take a simple gut instinct, about what’s right and wrong, and magnify it into the actual voice of the Holy Spirit. Now this is truly flirting with disaster my friend. It’s real danger too.

It’s a mistake to think that I’m so special that The Holy Spirit will guide and direct me in my life. I do know that when I keep my relationship with Jesus Christ as healty as I possibly can. That this is when Gods Holy Spirit will give me some guidence. But it’s also true that I’m a very selfish and self centered individual. I’ve had many years of practice at all my many selfish and self centered habits. Like riding waves.

I feel extremely close to God when I ride waves. Or if I’m just on my belly on the surfboard. Paddling along. All the way across Montery Bay… This has been a goal of mine for a couple years now.

Sometimes when I expecially hard on myself. And trying to convince people just how humble I can be. I call myself a professional narcisist, it can even seem true some days. But if you talk with me, on the very same day, I can do a pretty good job of convincing you that I’m much less self centered than I actually am. I can really do a lot to make myself think that I’m indeed “walking with God” the same way many of the heroes in the Old Testement did. But it’s a long a slow process learning to really hear the voice of God guiding me in my every day life. I don’t expect to get the hang of this any time soon. Nope.

It’s not likely that God wants me to risk my life chasing adrenaline. But it’s also true that He indeed gave me total freedom to do as I please for my entire life. I have spent a large number of my years really thinking that I knew how to enjoy this freedom. I’ve been wrong about this too. A lot. But how many of us really know how to handle the freedom our God has given us?. Not many if you ask me.

There’s some kind of balance that I need to find. One part of me wants to keep on being wreckless with my freedom. The other wants to walk with God. Both are good and strong.

There’s a choice here for me to make. Between Jesus Christ the Son of our loving God. Or the devil. Cuz the devil does indeed exist my friends.

Satan is a very real and dangerous force on this earth. He is in charge of many of the people I have to deal with. The devil tells lies. Lies like “it’s okay to go ahead and live a lil” “you’ve earned this man!, go ahead and partake”. On and on, the lies come. And they will not stop. Not ever.

I’m free to do as I please. But just who do want to please in this world? I know that I’m better off spending my energy pleasing God. But then my flesh and bones comes calling again and I smell that salt air. In my mind I can see the nose of my long board halfway up the blue green face of a wave that traveled seven hundred miles across the pacific ocean. made just for me personally (at least this is what my imagination things…) A beautiful and perfect give from the loving God that made me. Building, rolling, and heaving as it pushes in across the reef.
Here’s a sample of what it’s like to catch a wave. Hopefully you will understand why I crave this all encompassing thrill.
I paddle hard as it comes up behind me, the third wave in a set of half a dozen jems. The horizin slowling sinks down in front of me as I match the momentum of this energy created days ago, half way across the sea. Just for little ol me.

The sound of water rushing under my board is enticing, ripples splash over the nose of the board and I think back to when I was a little boy. Running through the sprinkler. It’s the ocean this time and my eyes are wide open as the drops hit my face.

I just grin because I’m gaining speed… The waves pushes me up dramatically and suddenly the cliffs of Santa Cruz and the entire coastline sinks down before me. I push off and spring to my feet. It’s pure bliss as the wave crests and I’m dropping straight down into the pit.

This is real and pure fun now. In a matter of seconds I’m falling. Tons of water and energy is stacking up, building andchasing me, and all I’ve got to escape is my balance. My momentum. And gravity sweet gravity has pushed me deep into that dark green pit.

I lean back and in towards the wave. I’m a goofie foot wave rider so on a right break my back is to the wave and I can’t see the boiling foam, and the violent danger only a couple feet to my left. But a lean back and carve. I carve deep into the bottom of that monstor, deep into the pit. And point the nose back toward that smooth wall of glass made out of sea. It’s my wave.

I own it. It’s a gift from the loving God that made me and it’s mine all mine now. This is when I get “the stoke”. I’m absolutely stoke man!.

My right hand caresses the face as I squat down and accept the energy I just picked up in the pit. I really traveling now and the wind begins to whistle across my ears. I slap the lip a the top of the wave and grind my left rail deep into the face of my giant. Spring foreward as the board slides effortless under me out onto the face of my precious temporay paradice.

Then as I glide back down my wave I walk out onto the nose of my nine foot three chunk of fiberglass. One foot out over the nose and back into my imagination, I’m back to the front lawn when I was five years old. Running through the sprinklers, and the gentle spray reminds me that God does indeed love me.

He made this, God made this wave for Robert!. And let me tell ya, he did indeed own it.

Agape love. This is the unconditional love of our God. And it’s in the sea that I have felt His love so very many times. This is what it is that I crave so very much.

It’s the sea that allowed me to survive living on this planet long enough to find my way back to His grace and perfect mercy. I found it necessary to depart from my relationship with God many years ago. This got me into a world of pain and misery that I don’t every want to have to tell people about. I’m just grateful the He made the world so very beautiful. Because I could never have survived this planet without all the rich and wonderful creations our God has given us.

To be continued.

R-

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[Robbo]

I just need to find more people willing to pay me for my vast, ADHD-fueled knowledge…

Bingo!

I do indeed think that you have nailed it my dear.

We usually n mostly sometimes get paid in satisfaction and happiness.

But I would like it probably just as much if, and when this web site really starts to make some money. That Rick and friends would go ahead and send me a check every now and then in case I would like some ready made chocolate milk sometimes, and maybe a few more channels from the cable company too. That’s pretty much it though. I ain’t greedy.

I’m happy enough for now with mixing a lil bit of my chocolate flavored protein powder with the milk all by myself. It’s not bad. Good enough for me folks. heck, I like it.

Good enough.

:-)~

Use your imagination and come with me to a Jane’s Addiction concert!

Let’s Rock you guys!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=43iW8oB20Ps

 

 

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[Robbo]

I just got done exercising. And I really really really wish that I did not take stimulant medications.

Yes, it’s true you guys. I had to take a break from exercising and come here to read n write because my dang arms are getting too fat!. Actually it’s not that, I just need my heart to slow down because just like most of the first 46 or more years of my life, as I did my exercises today, my heart started really pounding. I can actually see my chest bumping each and every time my heart pounds. It’s a lil bit creepy.

It’s more creepy givin the fact that I’m a lil bit older, and I’ve got a bunch of heart attack and stroke history in my family history. So there’s more than just one reason for me to think a second or third time about taking any additional stimulant medications.

I just don’t want my heart to jump right out of my chest. That almost happened a couple weeks ago at the home of a beautiful woman I was dating for a while. I think she used to be some kind of exotic dancer of something.

But I’m a good and honest dude who’s not interested in fooling around with a woman unless I’m married.

That’s just the way it is. It’s the way I roll. No other options for this cat… That’s all I have to say about that.  ***Forest Gump voice***

It’s not likely that I’ll be taking ritalin or any other new medication any time soon either. I’m just not under any intense pressure in my life. I’ve got plenty of community things I’m involved in. I’ve got places I need to show up on time at, each and every day of the week accept for Mondays.

It’s likely that since it’s summer time and the warm California sunshine is blazing down upon us, that I’ll be taking off for Santa Cruz this coming Monday. But going to watch folks surf is not exactly a stressful situation. I’ll probably go rolling down west cliff drive and look for a bum or two that I might be able to help out. I can relate best to bums and street people. They think like I do. They are the out-casts of our society. So am I.

We can really relate.

I get made fun of in many of the places I go these days. ADD is a much more talked about malady than let’s say being paralyzed, or disabled in any other way. Folks are much more comfortable making fun of folks with ADD. And guess what you guys!? The things people say about us are almost always true!. We’re impulsive, we make silly mistakes. And we jump to wild crazy conclusions, we enthusiastically go into masterly detail about complicated conspiracy theories about how the rest of the folks in our lives are out to get us. (many times they actually are, huh?)

And we suddenly jump from one topic to another completely un-related one as if we were talking about the second subject the entire time!. That’s when we get that freaked out and amazed look of exasperation from the so-called “normal” folks in the world. We like to call then “linears” cuz they think in a straight line.

Well to me and some of you guys. That’s just plain boring!.

One subject at a time?, One sport at a time?, one adventure at a time?

Boring!.

But it’s not likely that I’ll be suffering from the symptoms of ADHD while I do that.  (jump from subject to subject and go on n on about silly stuff that don’t make sense) 

I’m just a kook.

A happy kook.

Thanks.

 

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[Robbo]

I think we’re always better off being as honest as we can possibly be. I’m a man, and this is what works best for me.

I don’t get to play silly little games with people. This is not to say that I have never done so. It’s just that when I have played silly games with other peoples hearts. I end up getting hurt in the end. Some way, some how. In the end, if I’m not as absolutely honest as I can be. And I knowingly and intentionally mislead people. I will get hurt at some point in the near future.

We do indeed reap what we sew. It’s guaranteed my friends.

Later, I’ve got more to say on this subject. I’m working on it. I’ve also learned by coming to this web site, and many other places that I study in my life. That I should really just take my sweet time when talking about human relationships.

Easy does it. Easy… does it each and every time. Nice and simple.

I’m living proof that going into any relationship in a hurry is just plain silly, foolish. And asking for deep deep doo doo.

Thank you.

Please drive to the next window…

R-

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[Robbo]

I won’t speak for anyone else but myself here. But I think we all just need some kind of connection with other human beings. We need to do things for people who we care about.

I do that here. I share what I’ve got inside my imagination, I share about my spiritual life.

I just plain share. I do that because I have a need to connect with other people. We all have one great thing in common here at TotallyADD. It’s a horrible malady in the first couple years, sometimes more. But later on, each and every one of us has the oportunity to really grow into a person we like to see when we bee bop into the bathroom several times a day.

We don’t duck away from the mirror like we used to. We don’t necessarily sit there and oogle ourselves either, but it’s safe to say that we can easily tolerate the freak staring back at us each time we decide it’s time to brush them choppers. Right?.

Go ahead and grin to yourself, you’ve earned it.

Go ahead, nobody is looking right?

Just smile then.

R-

PS, my lil romance escapade has ended. But I learned some valuable, and very painful lessons. I’m not feeling all that great about me today, but I’ve got a decent amount of hope. That’s something… Maybe in a week, or a few. I’ll be back to my normal happy go lucky self. Don’t hold yer breath though. She was an extra-ordinary woman, fine and fine indeed.

I’ll miss her.

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[Robbo]

Yep, just a little bit of basic psychology 101. And if you’re like me, just practice a little bit more patience.

The only way I can do it is to think about the situation I’m going to be in and firmly tell myself that I will listen and maintain eye contact. Also, I tell myself that my opinion/thoughts are not critical to discussion.

Simple, brilliant. But not easy. There was a great thread a while back about this topic. Similar at least. The solution was to keep a note pad in your lap. Just write down the questions you’ve got. Or any random thoughts you’ve got. Keep em for later, when you’ve got a chance to decide just how important it is to actually say what you were thinking.

Self restraint is golden.

Show the person you’re talking to some respect. Let her finish what she’s got to say.

I wish I could do this more often. I’d be alone much less.

…………………………—————-………………………….

It’s lonely as hell being the worlds fastest interrupter. I have pushed many lovely ladies out of my life just by not letting them complete a freaking sentence once on a while. Some day I hope to get the hang of it.

Some day.

It’s probably too late for “Dorothy” though, maybe not. Heck, all I’ve got is my imagination, and it’s always against me. It’s ridiculous  It lies too. My mom used to, and probably still does say “you don’t listen”. Well I do. I just don’t always remember everything because my mind is going about a freaking million miles an hour and my dang doc won’t let me start taking Ritalin again. I was taking it this time last year. Worked great!. But I listened to my imagination too dang much… It lied to me and said “you’re acting like a dang grown man too much, you’re freaking boring man!!!. nobody will like you if you stay so mellow”. Well crap you guys. I didn’t have anyone to really talk to about this stuff. So I decided on my own to quit taking it.

Now look at me… No, don’t. I ain’t doing very good. It’s the shit you guys.

It’s The Shits!!!

It’s shit.

Ya win some, ya lose some. Losing does not make us a loser. Feeling like a looser don’t make us a loser. But I’m feeling like I should have a dang L on my forehead today.

I’m gonna go check in the mirror just to make sure I didn’t walk in my restless sleep last night and paint one on… Don’t ask me what the heck I’m talking about. I don’t want to get too deep into all my personal crap. That ain’t what I’m here for. I’ll just kinda hint around and the rest is up to your imagination you guys.

Let me know how I did, okay?  :-D~

R-

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[Robbo]

Bingo! @Larynxa,

“You’re not burning up those hormones by running for your life, so they’re just keeping you in a permanent state of stress, raising your blood pressure & pulse rate, increasing your belly fat (and risk of diabetes), and all sorts of other unpleasant things.”

I’m a lil bit over a mile each time I go out for exercise now. At first it was 4 days a week. I think now that… well, since I’ve got way too much time on my hands. I think I’ll start going a lil bit farther down the path next to one of the gazillion canals we’ve got here in the land of milk and honey.

I got some good pictures of a horse today. I’m thinking up a name for the blond one that was out today. There’s a chocolate brown one that always turns around and shows me it’s ass when I take out the camera. Maybe the blond is much less shy about it’s looks. It always looks like it’s posing. Must be the mare. ;-)~

When I get home from blasting the wind in my face I like to work out with a dumb bell. It’s about 3 or 4 pounds with the clamps. I put just one 2.5 pound weight on it. Usually about 2 or 3 sets of 12 or 20 for each muscle set. To me a “muscle set” is any two opposing muscle groups. Like my biceps, and my triceps.It’s all about balance. I used to be very heavy into body building for most of my youth. Weight training. Power lifting. Just all of it. All the dang time. People that actually caught up with me probably might have called me something like “turbo”. But I spent most of my time alone back in those days. It’s not likely that I’ll go back to over-doing that stuff.

But now that I understand my body chemistry a lil better, I feel like it’s a good idea to keep on pumpen iron like I’ve been doing.

I’m a recovering narcissist. It ain’t fun to admit. But it’s honest…may not be the truth, but it’s honest. Lot’s of folks in this camp can probably relate, please don’t take this wrong.

I don’t mean it in a sense of black and white. All the struggle we talk about on this web site are on a spectrum!. Please remember this!. There’s a lot of grey in our world. Get freaking used to it!!!!!.Grey is a colour that means Wisdom. 

The ones with really severe narcissistic tendencies are out chasing what-ever they’re obsessed with instead of trying to plug some of their energy back into the rest of our civilization.

We’re here.

Doing what ever the heck we can to make this world at least a lil bit better. In our own way. It’s the only way we can roll, after all. Right?
R-
PS, The wind was biting hard on my joints this morning. I just tried to think about when I used to paddle out into 55 degree water in the winter. What made it easy was the fact that I was constantly paddling. As long as we’re busy burning calories, and have a decent amount of warm clothing covering us. It’s almost never too cold.

I bet you guys up in The Great White North see joggers all the time buzzing around in the snow in neoprene suits. I’ve bot a 4/3 wet suit. Same thing basically, I would have died of hypothermia without it. The important thing is to have enough real calories Plus Protein  to burn. (I also eat a little bit of creatine if I’ve got any soreness). But protein is actually energy food you guys!. zzzz. I really really like the dopamine buzz I always get when I work out. I’ve read some interesting things about exercise addiction/adrenaline addiction. The truth is that I’ve just got ADD brain chemistry.  I love the way exercise balances out my brain chemistry.
It ain’t a crime to exercise a lot. Too much of anything ain’t good. Huh? Exercise, you’ll feel better. I don’t care if you think you’re fat. Give your-self a dang break, okay?Thanks. 

Dang!, when I press “edit” not, it’s all freaking old school html. I wonder what I did wrong to deserve this crap?.

Can’t please everyone…

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[Robbo]

Sign me up.

I’m a professional guinea pig!

:-D~

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[Robbo]

Yep, I know that “Worthy” feeling… all too well. It was mostly in my imagination though…

@pigmonkey ya know you look exactly like a good friend who was the quarterback in my high school. But I won’t be naming that high school any time soon because I think it’s only fair to let each and every one of the members of this forum hold on to whatever level of anonymity they choose to keep here’ So I won’t call you by his name.

Remember that football game at the beach party? (of course you don’t, but use yer imagination, okay?) The beach party scene at night in Pointe Break always reminds me of that day. Xept it was at night in the movie.

People come into our lives, and they also leave. It all happens for a reason. We don’t always get to know the season. But our imagination sure does make what’s happening now, n here much more fun and even dramatic. Huh?

“I cope by assuming that everyone else is just as terrified as I am and are better at dealing with it, or hiding it.”

I get that same gut instinc all the dang time. For no aparent reason… It’s ugly and not fun. But it helps to know that it’s not likely that I’m the only one feeling it. 

We’re not in trouble. We’re just human.
humans afraid.
R-

PS it’s also true that I’ve been bullied into that “fight or flight” mode much too many times in my life. I was a defensive end. Use to do not nice things to quarterbacks. ***grins*** My friend from high school used to play both ways all dang night. Then we’d go party. He was an inside linebacker.

He kicked ass… took names. Then invited those names to the party after. We all had fun.

 

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