[Robbo]

That search idea works great! thanks agen billd.

Are you still the spelling police billd? it’s a miracle I remembered that huh? hmmm maybe it was Toofat, that joked around about giving me a ticket when I joked about my goofie spelling. I think that was my first post here. Wow! I just remembered where too. It’s a miracle! I found it. I better finish proofreading this and get outa here, the ritalin will soon wear off… I think slowing down my brain helps the memory too. I hope that wasn’t just a fluke, flukes happen a lot to me. The fact that I could find it without the search trick, and in less than 2 minutes is proof to me that the methylphenadate works. And I’m not craving more. So I’m not as worried as my GP doctor about it being a stimulant, or addictive. I could complain more about that, but I’ve already done that here.

http://totallyadd.com/forum/topic.php?id=1869 (the first post)

><<Google – use it to search this site only.

sleep site:totallyadd.com

for example, will get you anything on THIS SITE ONLY containing the word sleep.

If you want to focus on sleep disorders, you would type:

“sleep disorder” site:totallyadd.com ><< (billd’s search trick.)

I ran a search for “feedback about this site” and this was the first page on it! amazing! huh? I have a new idea that I want to put in the suggestion box, so to speak. This thread kinda looks like the closest thing to a suggestion box.

my search result.

http://www.google.com/search?client=safari&rls=en&q=feedback+about+this+site+:+search+totallyadd.com&ie=UTF-8&oe=UTF-8

This is the new thread I decided not to start:

______There’s a new sheriff in town, YEAH RIGHT…____

SO, *turning down volume*** Greetings fellow uncomfortably struggling miss-fits, superstars, up n comings and not so thrilled to be here peoples.

That title was just for fun, and attention!. I got the idea from Reggie Hammond. (Beverly hills cop) Ya all be cool, it’s just a joke.

I’ve started feeling a little bit more isolated and lost in the shuffle than my normal state of outsiderness lately. (The Outsiders, great movie!) even here. I don’t like religion, it’s the one word besides politics that makes most people even me, turn on their heels and RUN!. Nowadays a person can get blown up believing the wrong religious dogma. Literally!.

I prefer Darma, rather than Dogma. Look it up if you don’t know what Darma is, even Darma can sound, look and feel too much like control and dictation. It’s one way to live. A choice. I’m not here to preach.

I’m looking for more connection with other people here. There are more than 20,000 folks that have come here to talk, n talk, n talk, I’m one of em. I can really type! On AND ON! huh? please don’t answer that, it’s rhetoric. I’m rhetorical, lot’s of people with add symptoms. PWADDS. put an A on the end and we can have yet another 12 step program! Yikes!’ I hope nobody takes that seriously. ADD anonymous?

I’ve talked once before about a chat room here, I think it could work well. I’m willing to purchase a few of the fridge magnets and maybe an adhd shirt, to help with the additional cost, a chat room is a whole lot of code to write. Way beyond what I’m capable of. I can’t even remember java script.

If not a chat room how about a way for people who have more in common being given a way to interact more on a one on one basis, but still maintain privacy. I’ve been to a website where we could send, and block private messages to each-other, that way it’s more safe to talk to each-other with less risk of misunderstanding, and what can sometimes end up a flamewar on an otherwise very successful web site and recovery place. And removed.

Any ideas? suggestions? is it already hear and I haven’t found it? I’ll be on the edge of my seat with anticipation… Here, there, everywhere.

I are not different, We are! get it?

OI812

all be bok.

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[Robbo]

>>>I wouldn’t advise you take in when in court though – I’d assume you need your mind to be sharp then. I hope things sort themselves out for you.<<>

It’s good to remember that we all react differently to medz, I take other medications for depression that may or may not interact with ritalin and vice versa. So the generic Ritalin (methyphenidate) I take slows me down just enough to not screw up what I’m trying to do, and keeps me from flying off after the next shiny thing that catches my attention, leaving another thing undone. At least less anyway…

Whatever it is I’m trying to do, I do it better. Smoother. The dosage I started at is extremely low, and I’m frustrated when it wares off and I’m back to my “Scattered” self.

I never want to discourage anyone from being helpful here. So Scattybird, please don’t take offense. Your advice just might be exactly right for our new member. I end up regretting it lot’s of times even when I just share experiences in a way that sounds like advice. Or my opinion, which is what this is. JMHO

I ain’t no termite. (figure that one out, just for fun)

PS since this thread started out as a VENT, I want to vent about how much I dislike that dang clock on the wall. ALL CLOCKS, TIME, and especially deadlines… This adhd stuff really is a bad Monster/Dragon/Beast. At least I’m on my way to taming it. Too bad I can’t make it go away permanently.

Vent #2 waiting for the next doctors appointment when I know I just need to take this medication more often sucks like crazy. Too many drug addicts have made doctors paranoid about medications. Waiting is torture… Especially when I can’t focus enough to read the boring magazines in waiting rooms. I’m waiting for help with patience! fortunately I know the medication is only a part of the solution. More important than I want it to be… Acceptance sucks. yADHDayadda onandon… Blahblah crunchcrunch

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[Robbo]

ACK!!!!!

this page is a gut cruncher! hehe. Great idea.

I’m in that 2, or three hour window of time when the Ritalin is working. It’s only a small piece of the whole solution, but it’s making it possible for me to do all the other endless coping strategies that help me live with an AHDH brain. No time to fix dyslexia typos today….

If I remember to come back I promise to bring some short n sweet funny ones. How to remember? hmmmm. to post it or not to post it…

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[Robbo]

I know this is an older page, but I’m glad I found it. Lot’s of great advice that I can use, and I didn’t have to start a new topic about social skills struggles. I never really developed social skills, for a lot of the same nature/nurture reasons that don’t really matter now. I’m into the solution now. Not the cause. My lack of long term friendships has a lot of the same reasons of some of you guys. That’s part of the cause of my depression. ADHD is the main cause of my depression. I may have to always take them, but I’m taking less depression medz and starting (slower than I want to ) on the ADD medz.

I’m also finding that the solution is just as no_dopamine, toofat, and others say. For me to try to keep my focus and attention on the other people, really pay attention, not think as much about what I want to talk about. Or me at all. More listening, remembering names, and common courtesy like introducing people. That helps me memorize names too. I’ll check out those links. I never really learned “social skills” that’s not a crime! It’s part of undiagnosed ADHD and other similar struggles.

So many times when I restrain myself from talking about what seems urgent enough to interrupt someone, five minutes later (If I remember it) it turns out to be not that interesting. Sometimes it helps to have a scratch pad just to doodle a little, n write stuff instead of saying it. But still show real interest in the other person, genuinely have interest too. My planner comes in handy for that, getting the planner out if I’m making plans for later with the person I’m talking to, gives me an excuse to have it there on my lap. And I try to be discreet about scribbling my endless ideas down. Remembering to show up for plans I make with friends would have helped me hold on to a lot of good friends I’ve had over the years. I can relate to Krazy Kat a lot!, that’s where the planner comes in handy. Especially on the phone. I can write down things people say that are important for me to remember. (family, health issues, and worries people have. things I do care about, but forget to ask about next time we talk) I never thought about putting this much work into keeping good friendships. Now that I’m older, it’s more important because for whatever reason, the ADHD symptoms, like being forgetful are more glaring, and work like a new friendship repellent sometimes.

I have to just accept the fact that not everyone is going to like me also. Let that go, don’t trip on it!

It’s a bummer waiting to get the right medication that will make it more possible to actually do these things, restrain myself. Actually use the planner!

In the meantime I’ve got tons and tons of good encouragement to read here.

Thanks gang, some of this is a lot like therapy, really good therapy.

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[Robbo]

Wow, that’s great advice. I’ve just been surfin around and found this old topic. (sorta having relationship struggles too)

Better communication in written form has been a aggravating struggle for me as long as I can remember. Thanks for making it look easy here Dr. J. It’s lucky I found this.

It’s difficult to accept that not everyone is going to accept me as I am here. The stuff about safety and trust are so much more complicated and difficult on the Internet.

I’ll make it one of my goals to be succinct, clear and helpful without tons of words.

Thansk for asking the Q Veronica.

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[Robbo]

What cool people we have here. When it hurts less I’ll tell you guys about a unique and priceless experience I had a few days ago. I’m really gettng close to deciding to adopt a cat. Cat’s are great creatures.

Cool cats billd, thanks for sharing about them. They’re easy to love huh? It’s amazing that I’ve survived this long without a pet. My last girlfriend had 4 cats and a dog. I watched a bunch of videos of them last night from an old backup disc. That’s the beginning of my recent cat encounter that’s still hurting a lil. A stray cat just ran up to me, rubbed up against me until I said “okay cmon, up up!” it jumped on my lap as if it was home at last… waited outside for me… for hours! Ack…

more later.

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[Robbo]

I’m very much the same way Trashman, I have a strong urge to make a joke about it, making fun of myself is fun. But it’s too easy to be miss understood, umm, Little Miss Understood?, No… Mr. misunderstood yeah that’s it! Hmm, I think picking a picture of a squirrel was a good choice for my identity here. My brain runs around like one.

I still like bikes, only a horse is a more comfortable ride than a motorcycle. A horse could never have given me as much pure fun and sense of freedom. Long rides through the mountains alone.

Anyway at least this time I’m pretty sure we understand each-other. It’s a good thing to care about how what we say affects the world. My posts would be much much longer if I actually thanked every single person that said something to help me. Today I’m just writing to make sure you know you’re on the list of people who help me feel less like a weirdo, more like a genuine human being. And actually OK. I’m good enough, I deserve to be here. Please don’t let your brain tell ya you don’t deserve to be here. Mine still tries to think that way. I just let that nonsense slide off into the sea; and I imagine myself surfing the never-ending waves of thoughts, moods, yeah butts, and second guessing that keep pushing me towards a rocky shoreline. Some waves are good n I catch em, ride em well, kick out before I get too far inside. Other times they’re too big, close outs, or too crowded. I’ve caught large dangerous waves(ideas) that nearly killed me. Life is a lot like surfing. I’m glad that surfin analogy/metaphor idea popped into my head… An open mind is like keeping my eyes out at the sea, waiting for the next set of waves, knowing there’s a good long ride in store for me. I choose more carefully now that I’m finding out more about who I am. I’m totallyadd! (we are).

A mind can be a terrible thing to listen to! It’s good to not waste it either.

Surf on Brah…

Hang loose.

PS, I’m glad successful adders pissed off our anonymous friend. He started one of the better threads here. That ain’t easy….. blah blah yadda yadda ….. etc. etc. etc. onandonandon.

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[Robbo]

Better self restraint and impulse control!!

I wrote a big long scattered post that talked about at least a dozen other subjects besides the one at the top of the thread. Decided to wait a while, get away from the computer and relax. Came back, Deleted most of it, then completely re-wrote it. It was much shorter n better, and I felt like it was on caliber with so much of the great writing I’ve been reading all over this site. I think I was helping more than complaining/asking for help. This place rocks! You guys are rock stars.

It’s a wonderful thing to just suffer less from this awful, complicated, and mixed up can of worms that is adhd.

Praying and meditating are a very huge part of why I’m doing/feeling better. I’m grateful to have faith in the loving God that created me.

I wonder how many other people are getting spiritual help, praying and feeling like that really makes a difference? I can’t imagine recovering from anything without God.

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[Robbo]

Tonight success is reading 100% of the first two pages of this thread. All in one sitting! I will look foreword to the next time I experience success.

Feeling comfortable in my own skin, feeling like I’m a valuable member of the world.

Having some way to be helpful to the nearest human being.

Success is the growing capacity to give love, interest, and attention to the thing right in front of you, the now.

Letting someone else finish what they have to say instead of finishing their sentence for them so I can say what I want to say! hehe.

The list goes on and on. I’ve really thoroughly enjoyed reading all the articulate beautiful things people have said on the first two pages. It’s gonna be fun reading all the rest.

Tonight I like humanity. That is indeed a rare and priceless experience, another way to experience success.

I remember one time I farted and it smelled kind-of good. Anyone care to analyze that comment? ***snickering like a schoolboy prankster***

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[Robbo]

This sounds like a great idea to me also. I just got on facebook finally, but I’m not sure I want to stay there, it’s complicated, eats up too much of my time. I can’t really be as honest as I am here about my struggles either, adhd info there. Too many people in my not very close family would be embarrassed if I started telling more about myself. I just finished reading the “Holidays, I hate holidays” thread. http://totallyadd.com/forum/topic.php?id=2043#post-18299 For once in my life I’ve found a very large group of people who all feel that same as me about the holidays. I generally don’t participate. My birthday is right smack dab in the middle of Christmas time… As I get older, I kinda like Christmas helping people forget about my birthday.

I tried for more than 10 years to fit in at a disability focused web site and finally gave up because I just didn’t ever feel like I was accepted, or actually helping much. That site had a few of cyber-bullies and egomaniacs, I did build a few fairly good friendships. But it was mostly a place to clown around at. My untreated ADHD made my writing very easy to make fun of, I had been trying to stick to the “just try harder, apply more discipline”ridiculous way of dealing with it for the las 5 or 6 years, never actually admitted to myself I really had it, just the symptoms, I was much more prideful than I am now. I have yet to see anyone being abusive or mean spirited here. I never did read the rules (it’s not like us to read rules or directions huh?) I just kinda took a gamble that I would be treated with the same respect I try to give. I’ve been here maybe 4 months and some of you, A lot of you are really growing on me. And not like a rash, or some kind of fungal infection either. No itch no scratch ***chuckling***

I can count of people being honest here, because most of us are too forgetful to lie, we won’t be able to keep track of/remember what we said to who. I’ve said a lot of dumb things, and I’m wrong about stuff more than I’d like to really see, but that’s not the same as a deliberate lie. I’m a bit of a dork in addition to having ADHD. and I don’t mean that in a bad way. People have been telling me I’m too hard on myself for what seems like forever. I just like to say/write things that I think are quirky/funny. To me a dork is just a person who is extremely awkward and spends a lot of time with his foot stuck in his mouth. That ain’t no crime! My sense of humor is sometimes more dry than people can understand. A gallery sounds like a fun place to clown around and let my creative juices squirt.

I hope this Gallery idea develops into something we can all be happy with. I have the same concerns as Scattybird, I have even thought about re-registering with a new username. Too complicated probably. It’s too easy for people to figure out it’s me if someone in my life came here after googling me. That would suck. The body builder squirrel is almost too much of a metaphor for me. I’m looking foreword to thinking first more often.

I wish I could just quit trippin about all the extremely wordy posts I’ve splattered all over the Internet the last 14 or so years, mostly just at one web site. I’m happy that I’m less childish than I used to be, and care more about how what I write affects people. The not taking myself too seriously stuff gets very difficult. When I’m not being an impulsive dork that is.

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[Robbo]

Right on!, it worked first try!. Ack!

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[Robbo]

Great info billd, thanks.

“Name of thing I’m searching for” site:totallyadd.com

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[Robbo]

hehehe, I can’t imagine surviving life adhd or not, without a sense of humor. Funny looking people are priceless!.

Goofballs rule!

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[Robbo]

That reminds me of a fad that went around in my daughters high school that she told me about. If someone acted like they were unstable, frustrated, or just out of the ordinary/weird. Just having human problems. It was funny to look at them and say “you need therapy”, depending on how ya said it of course. The same way as when family/friends say “have you been taking your meds?” But it was meant more of a joke. It pisses me off a lot if people question me at all about what medications I take or any other personal question at the wrong place and time. That would piss me off too.

Imagine life without a sense of humor. Ack!! that’s awful!!

Just last night I made the mistake of talking about the ADHD diagnosis in a group of people that didn’t know me very well at all. (I was being impulsive with my mouth, inviting trouble…) Of course I got a few of those same old skeptical questions, opinions and comments from people who consider themselves some kind of expert. Including “are you taking medication?” I felt like saying “opinions are like toilet paper” n then condescendingly explaining what I meant by that. I need to remember to try not to say everything that my brain impulsively wants my mouth to blurt out. Other people do that to me and It pissed me off. Sometimes people just suck. Love and tolerance in extremely hard work some days.

It’s easy to understand how you can be frustrated. Being treated like a mental patient by a so called normal person can be torture.

So called normal people, that’s the thing. So many people have real problems that they should get help with, or at the very least, admit and look at honestly. It’s so much easier to look at what’s wrong with other people to feel less troubled or neurotic. I think what you’re saying helps explain why it bothers me if people look at my life in order to feel grateful that their life is not so bad. That’s not what I’m in this world for, well it’s not what I want to be in this world for. But reality is as it is… I sometimes get pissed off when people tell me to think about people who have much larger struggles than myself and to get grateful. Again, that happens because I’m talking about me/my struggles, so I’ve invited it. I think it’s possible that we all compare ourselves to other people too much, and focus on the differences more than we should. If I compare myself to other people with disabilities, it rarely ends well. None of us experience problems the same way.

Relationships are just too much trouble some days. I give myself permission to take a break once in a while. Retreat a little bit and just lighten up.

It’s good when I can feel compassion about someone else’s problems, and leave talking about/looking at me, and my problems completely out of the equation. Compassion for anyone regardless of how large or small the struggle they’re having always ends well. Even if the problem they have is that they are an ass! It’s still sad hehehehe. I’m better off just listening to music by myself sometimes. I like to be by myself when I’m fed up with fighting my way through uncomfortable social situations. It’s a trick finding the balance between too much time by myself and too much human contact. I love music so dang much! it’s not judgmental, it just is. It’s art. Maybe I should see people as art. God’s artwork. Some entertain, some annoy!.

I’m trying to make talking less, or just less about me! higher on my list of changes I want to make that help me live more comfortable inside my skin.

People are Strange when you’re a Stranger -Jim Morrison-

PS I try SO DANG HARD to keep my posts short, it’s a difficult riddle. I don’t know why I trip on that…

PPS, ah crap! I didn’t realize until I was done writing that this is a year or more old. I found this post running a search for that -Define Crazy- blog by Rick. Now I’m freaked out… (again, lol) to post or not to post, that’s the ?…

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[Robbo]

Wupps! pardon me, Brain flatulation!… hehe, the first time I hit send it took more that 5 or 6 seconds so my busy brain didn’t think it worked. I’ll bet we’ve all done that a few times.

Guh nite

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[Author]

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