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Pride is one thing we likely have in common as ADHD. We are too proud to admit we need help. Then you regret it later. Frasier(TV) which took this from wisdom, “It’s not the things we do in life that we regret most. It’s times where we didn’t even try.”
“Too err is human.”
“%&#@ happens, move on.” unknown
You were to afraid do this and that. You make mistakes. We have all mountain of this baggage hidden away. Some baggage you can get rid of. Most you can’t. So, you have mountain of baggage. Live in the moment. You screwed up. Move on. Who I am telling this too? You, me, or both. ANSWER: both and all
I should listen to my own advice.
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I was really good with computers, but failed badly in getting any job in computer science. I won many awards. It didn’t fit in the corporate drone model they wanted. Later, I realized that the profession was leaving me empty.
So, I took a film class. It like key fitting a lock, a strong click. I was like duck to water. I was at the top of my class. After that, still had the drone problem. My network wasn’t that great back then. Now, I finally have a good network. It took me a while to figure out the specific area. Going through studios was good idea for making money. I was taught the methods. I’d heard about how the studios had the creative control over your project. Your are a paid employee and they can fire you from your own project. ICK, watching them butcher my work and have no say. I’d rather be poor than sell my integrity for money . So, I decided on indie film maker. I make the rules and spend project money on what matters.
For the first time in my life, I was thrilled to be going to a college class. It wasn’t work, it was fun. :]
I have a steady income now, some other money making projects in the works. Soon, i’ll have lower rent apartment. More money!
“Do what you love and get paid for it.” Unknown
What will you choose?
Make a ton of money at a job you hate. Get stressed from long hours at work. Dread every day you have to goto work. Feel depressed and empty. Worry about getting fired due to office politics. Worry about layoffs during an economic downturn, sure your the first person to go. Eat fast food all the time, since you don’t have time to eat healthy. Get worthless junk to keep up with the Jones and get into debt in the process. Worry about how your going to pay your large debt and bills. Later, die early from stress plus unhealthy eating related illnesses like heart disease, stroke, cancer, and others.
Find a low stress job that makes enough to get by. Do your own independent projects and make some money. . Know that studies show you don’t get any happier above 75k per year. Yes, rich kiddies aren’t any happier than you. Most have an emptiness that makes them want more and more money. If they get that money, they are still empty. Today, I get up in the morning, getting excited and thrilled to be doing my job. I’m not going worry much about my moderate bills to pay. If make lots of money, that’s great. If I make some money, i’ll live better. Either way, i’ll be happy.
IMHO, happiness guide:
Do what you love and get paid for it.
Realize true happiness doesn’t come from money.
Live better and happier with less baggage.
Teach others these rules.
REPORT ABUSEI was so busy that I forgot to take it for a few days. I definitely noticed a difference. It was much harder to focus and I was yawning, a lot. I’m not going off the meds again!
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I feel like a fool that I didn’t see job hunting as a futile waste of time. The truth was there staring me right in the face for many years. I feel disappointed in myself. I tried to be like everybody else. When I knew, I wasn’t like everybody else. Trying to be “normal”. I’m trying to let go, but it’s not easy.
I knew I was “different” at an very early age. I was voted “most unique” by my high school class. I saw the world very differently than anyone else. You need to accept your limitations and strengths. Your not “normal” and average. You are extraordinary, get over it!
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dafiloola> The longest job I ever had was 6 months! All the rest three days to three months. Yep, “we are family”.
I have you beat. The longest was three months and that was one time. One month, one time. Three days, one time. That’s a total of three paying jobs in a lifetime. I’m so glad I woke up and smelled the rotten eggs. In 2008, I saw the light and realized job hunting was a futile waste of time. Now and for all time, “I’m done!” Got myself on disability and out my parents house. Wish I had seen the light earlier in life and not wasted so much time trying to be a corporate drone. I’m surviving to the next day, but at least now I have steady paycheck.
FYI, Before my disability paycheck was lowered, I saved up for the computer.
Need get that book written.
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sugargremlin> filmbuff, looking to some free biblio or computer therapy.
The privacy of that method is questionable. No thanks.
billd>Did you get the meaning of “pay as you can afford” ? Apparently you’ve never used such a system.
Low income- pay a little – WHAT YOU CAN AFFORD – meaning if you can’t afford – no pay. If you can afford to pay some, you pay some, it varies based on income, etc.No income- pay **nothing**
Been looking for many years. Never ever seen one like that. All private ones cost something.
>Who said one phone call?? Not me. Hey, I have taken advantage of said services, been there, done that. It was SESSIONS with a REAL person in person sitting across a desk from each other. Trust me, I’m a case myself –
You don’t live in the USA. “We handle only the most severe cases.”(public) Point out one of these low-income(no cost) private services. Referrals to a free licensed psych. Sounds like something out of Hollywood feel good movie.
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munchkin>It is actually possible to learn the basic boxes people use and fit yourself to the box that will be more likely to get you what you want – there’s something yicky about it, but if that’s what you have to do to put a roof over your head, that’s what you’ve got to do. I agree it’s exhausting!
I tried that for 10 years then 7 years. (yes, that hyperfocus made me ignore reason.) DOESN’T WORK! I can’t be packaged for employers, period. I learn that lesson and will NOT make that mistake again. Anyone else who can’t get a “regular job”. Suck in your pride and apply for disability.
One reason people don’t succeed in entertainment they can be packaged. The people who can’t be packaged do succeed often since they think outside the box. Comedy is great. You speak your mind and get paid for it. There are skills, but you likely have them already. Speaking truths that “packaged” people would never utter. Your stuck on disability, what have you got to lose? Try entertainment.
munchkin>I make a spectacle out of myself without even realizing it, and tell strangers way too much personal stuff.
If you think I do those rants on impulse, think again. Those posts take up to 2hrs to enter(a topic for another day). I have lots of time to think about what I want to get across. Some topics in person, I won’t discuss. Most of the time, I tell things as they are, not what people want them to be.
I think were more fearless than most. It’s hardwired as adhd. I remember saying as teen, “I don’t play by the rules, I make the rules.” I think were hardwired to be leaders. We made to stand out in a crowd, not blend into it.
munchkin> I think the “first impression” is unconscious for people – a product of their upbringing and experience.
It’s both. If your parents were racists, a rich person who thinks – “It’s poor fault for being poor.”, and various other forms of being shallow and selfish, you’ll likely be the same unless see yourself as flawed and become a better person. Our hard-wiring(evolution-genetic coding) is geared to fear anything that is different(not of my tribe). In the distance past, they were competition or a threat to you. Simply put we act like apes and don’t realize it.
I was watching this teen kids show studying it(and sometimes enjoying it) to understand why it’s popular. I realized how very shallow, selfish, and lemmings the characters were. TV shows mirror society or what it should be(star trek). Usually, those teens grow up to be shallow, selfish, lemmings. Society feels the impact of these bad personalities.
sugargremlin>sometimes we are wrong about what someone’s first impression of us is
. for me, the first impression depends on the setting and the person. I range almost anything.That would describe me as well. “I am who i’m with.”, star trek – next gen episode about the female metamorph. Watch that episode. I see a lot of myself in her. When I mentioned, “That I have many faces. You never see them all.”, to someone online, I never heard from them since. Clearly, a “packaged” person who couldn’t handle my complex nature.
If weren’t for my volunteer work encounters with selfless people, I’d believe the human race was hopeless. We deserved to wiped out by asteroid hit or gamma ray burst. I go sometimes just to remind myself that there is hope for humanity, social evolution.
REPORT ABUSEI can, see my blog, “first time on meds.” It’s like getting glasses for the first time. You see everything clearly. All these new details to look at. All this beauty to embrace . It’s overwhelming. Where to start? Make your list. What items are your most important first. Create it on a text document in an easy to find directory. As Nike(brand name) says, “Just do it!”
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